Connecting with the deck...

..is much harder than I thought!! Lately I've been pretty..insecure or stressed when reading. I get a quicker heartbeat and a strong feeling of uneasiness. Is it because I chose a deck that wasn't so much suited to me?? Did this ever happen to any of you and what did you do to get rid of it?

Hey, welcome to tthe forum!

How about starting out with 3 cards (for a reading) and then making only one sentence?

You can go to the readings forum here, and also, are you familiar with the podcasts? Those are great to listen to.

All the best to you!

First may I ask if you are new to tarot? Perhaps you are nervous to use a new deck, maybe a new deck is more intimidating to you than it seems. If you like the cards and the art, take some time alone, take 3 deep breathes, I mean deep slowly inhale and exhale so you can clear your mind and focus your intent.Then begin to shuffle, shuffle until they are comfortable in your hands, until they are starting to feel "yours" you can feel your own energy throwing off the cards back at you.....and then have a play, relax and dont be too serious get to know your new deck, yes you may not always be able to read with a deck you like, some decks may have only certain topics they will give you info of, I have a deck that reads only for love, but spend time with them, get a feel for them and enjoy your cards!

NQ

You could also possibly be afraid of what you anticipate the cards are going to tell you. If you feel this is the case, don't be. Tell yourself that if there's anything you're not meant to know, it will not be shown to you.

Sounds like a case of stage fright. Maybe you're anxious about performing in front of your cards. Take it easy, take deep breaths, do some meditation, etc.

If you're worried about something bad happening to you as a result of the cards, you could look into protection magick, if that's up your alley.

Thank you so much for the answers!
Yes, I quite new to tarot! Well I'm glad it's only "stage fright" or anxiety, I was afraid my deck would be rejecting me or some sort of thing.
NightQueen, what you said is intriguing me, how could I see if my deck is only fit for one topic?

The cards don't have power of their own. The power and magic is within you. So don't be nervous with them. Just relax and play around with them. Get to know them. There's no reason to be nervous or afraid of them.

Schnee said:

Thank you so much for the answers!
Yes, I quite new to tarot! Well I'm glad it's only "stage fright" or anxiety, I was afraid my deck would be rejecting me or some sort of thing.
NightQueen, what you said is intriguing me, how could I see if my deck is only fit for one topic?

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I also agree that it is just nervousness, stage fright, anxiety. If a deck were not working well for you and you two were not connecting well or on the same wavelength, the most you might feel is confusion, or nothing at all. Instead of feeling the answer you might just feel nothing. Not worry or anxiety though.

What I do most want to say is that a deck cannot reject you. A deck is not alive and has no feelings. It is a pack of cards, cardboard with printed images, that is massproduced in a factory. Pops out of a machine with hundreds like it everyday. It does not have a mind or soul. It can't think of feel anything, much less rejection.

As Grizabella said so well, the magic in readings comes from inside you, not from inside the cards. Imagine it like if you are sitting at home one day and have a brilliant thought that you want to save so you could remember it. You go take out a pen and write it down so you can save it.

Now the pen may have just written something wise, but there is no wisdom in the pen itself. YOU used the pen to write down your inner wisdom. In the same way the cards are a just a tool with which you can focus and effectively use your own inner magic.

While the cards, when used can feel like more than the sum of their parts, they are still not alive or able to feel anything.

They are just a tool, like a hammer. You can build beautiful furniture with it, you can have beautiful memories of things you created with it, you can feel love when you see it, and even wonder in amazement at what you have accomplised with it. But at the end of the day, it has not feelings back for you. It's just your tool. It can't feel.

I can understand why you felt nervous sometimes though. If you were worried a deck might reject you, that would make most people nervous just to think that. No one like to be rejected. But in short, that's not possible.

Babs

I think you're fine starting off with the Aquarian. It's one of the great decks of the Seventies, and was the first deck for lots and lots of people. Folks have used it for all sorts of readings, so I doubt you'll find it a one-topic deck.

To help you connect with it, you may want to do lots of make believe readings. Make up a question and a querent (an actress wants to know if it would be a good idea to move to another city) and do readings for your imaginary customer's imaginary question. Just finding your answers and advice in the cards, without the pressure of wondering if you're getting it right, may be a help in connecting with your deck. It's just you and the cards that way, not you and the cards and the querent and the outside world.

nisaba said:

You could also possibly be afraid of what you anticipate the cards are going to tell you. If you feel this is the case, don't be. Tell yourself that if there's anything you're not meant to know, it will not be shown to you.

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Thats how I felt when I got my first deck a few weeks ago. I was so scared it was going to say something bad. But then I read on this one website that there really arent any "bad" cards. Even if some little booklet that came with you deck says so and so, you need to be able to get your own sense of what a card means, especially in the context of the question and its location in the spread youre doing. Dont be scared of the cards.

Also, I looked at each and every card really closely every day. Youll make observations about each card, how the person in the card looks and feels. Once you are able to get a sense of each card and be able to get somewhat of a "story" from them, youll feel more connected.

One more thing, if you feel like you got off on the wrong foot reorder your cards the way they were when you got them, then meditate, shuffle them really well, and do an interview spread.