Getting over the fear and doing your first paid reading.... how did you do it?

I've got to start reading for money.

We are in a difficult financial situation at the moment, and without boring you with the details, we are quite limitied as to what we can do to bring in more money.

So I've got to start charging money for my readings. Because this is something I can do that will ease our financial situation a little.

People come to me all the time for readings. Mostly friends and family, but sometimes it's people I barely know who've found out about me through friends and family. Some people I've been reading for for years and years now, and I can see how much the readings have benefited them, and they tell me that I am complelty accurate.

I love to read tarot. I love to read tarot for others. I find it deeply satisfying to be able to serve as a catalyst for people to change their lives.

And I know I can read. That's not the problem. I read well. If I came to me for a reading I would go away very pleased.

All I have to do is send out a text message or email to everyone I regularly read for, telling them that I am going to start reading proffessionally and to pass the message on to anyone who is interested, and people will come and they will pay.

But I paralysed with fear at the thought of reading for money. I'm not sure why... the pressure of needing to get it right if someone has paid for it? the terror of freezing up and making an idiot of myself? stories of local readers who can tell you how many kids you've got, how old they all are and what they're called - are people going to be expecting that?

I am wondering how people got over their fear to be able to start charging for money?

What was your first paid reading like?

Anna said:

What was your first paid reading like?

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It was a very long time ago. I'd known the woman from my other work (she was a client of the business, not a workmate) and she noticed a Tarot book on my desk. So not compromising my employer, I gave her my home phone number, expecting never to hear from her again. In fact she rang me and offered me money to do a reading. She came over, I made Chinese Tea, and we sat in my living room doing the reading there. I was working with a RW deck - I don't think I had yet really figured out there were options - and I remember it was my mini.

As soon as the Two Pentacles came up, the room was suddenly full of light, and I just sat back and watched while she read the card, a whole, long story about her late father and how he was watching over her and how that card told her that - she could see him dancing in it. She was incredibly grateful afterwards and I felt like a fraud - the most important and memorable thing that happened in the reading, she read for herself while I just quietly sat back and let it happen.

Since then, I've worked out that occasionally it has to be like that. Never forgotten that Two Pentacles in that deck, and it's never been her father since <grin>.

Do a day of reading for strangers, in exchange for money, which you will donate to a nominated charity. Then you get some practice at asking for money and setting a price, but not the fear of worrying if someone will think it was "worth-it", as your client will be doing a good turn for a needy charitable institution (and helping you in the process). Then try it again, and next time, drop the charity and set your prices for youself.

That was my introduction to charging for a reading, at a tarot fair run by a spiritualist church as a fundraiser for a refuge. Best introduction I can think of. Maybe you could send that email to your friends, promoting the charity day, and including all your regular contact details for future readings also. Then hope they forward it to all their friends, as a way to support you and also the charity. Then all their friends would have your number, and even if they don't come to the charity day, might want to call another time. And your friends are getting practice at passing on your contact details too! Always good to give you referral network some training also.

I remember so well the first time I read for money...trembling with fear as I sat at my little table.
Freezing up or not getting it right when money is exchanged was my primary concern too.
But something my husband said to me back then stuck with me...
He said, "Hon if the guy came to fix the washer and he did his best, but he looked at you and said "Sorry lady, but this machine has bit the dust."...would you blame him and not pay him for his time and expert opinion?"

And in a kind of convoluted way this is so true...we are offering a service worthy of pay, but we are offering an ethereal product...words, ideas, flashes, insights, inspiration, hope and the truth as the cards show it....
Getting it wrong is not so much getting it wrong as it is you and the client not being in sync with seeing the message coming through in the same way.
And this usually resolves itself after the client gets home and thinks about it for awhile.
Either they are going to accept your reading and go buy a new wash machine or they are going to get a second opnion and keep trying to fix the old one.

*No one is going to be 100% satisfied everytime....but if you have done your best you are worthy of your wage.

As for freezing...if this has never been a problem for you in the past it probably won't be when you are reading for money either...the energy will flow and you'll just open up and the words will pour out...
If not, if you freeze and can't see anything then you always have the option to close down the reading and give the person their money back...simple as that.
And rather than seeing you as a bad reader...they will see you as honest and sincere about your work and not willing to compromise the message for a dollar.
And they will be back, believe me.

Good luck, I'll be thinking of you...times are really hard financially at our house right now too and the money I make literally brings in the groceries...so it can be a big help...many blessings on this journey and I KNOW you will do just great and knock their socks off!

Maybe it would ease your fear if you set it in your mind that if you DO freeze up, you don't charge them. That way, you probably won't! And I bet the majority of the people you've been reading for for free won't mind a bit paying. You certainly know them by now, some have probably become friends, so you may even want to let someone slide who simply can't pay at the time.

Charge by donation by putting out a "karma jar". Let them pay as they can or as they feel is fair. That works out very well, and that way you're not thinking you've charged them unfairly if the reading doesn't work out as well as you hoped it would.

Put yourself in the frame of mind that you're doing this to provide a helping service to someone. Don't let it be about you. If you let yourself start worrying you're not going to be right and that you'll freeze up and look stupid, you're coming from the place of a false pride. Then it becomes about you and not about the sitter.

You're going to be wrong sometimes. Nobody is always "accurate". We're given to know what we're meant to know and sometimes we're simply not meant to know certain things. Accept the fact that you win some, you lose some. And some you might win or lose but not know it because you'll lose touch with the person before the situation plays out or they refuse to believe what the cards have had to say or they deny it when it's really true or any number of other things. If you accept that you're not always going to be right and that it doesn't matter anyway, then you're good to go.

Anna said:

...And I know I can read. That's not the problem. I read well. If I came to me for a reading I would go away very pleased.

But I paralysed with fear at the thought of reading for money.

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Great post.

And please forgive me for my response.

You’ve actually asked more than one question.

First off – you know you can read.

So can you read f2f for strangers? I may have missed if you can and have; and that’s really important. You really need to cut thy teeth on f2f for strangers first.

Once that’s dealt with…

Then you have to address your relationship with money.

Modern society teaches us some pretty strange (and stupid) things about money, and I’ve found that most people don’t understand it, and they also have a poor relationship with it (and if you don't have any - that exacerbates the whole issue).

Once your relationship with money is more clearly understood – the fear of reading for money vanishes. Then you’re left with the fear of reading for strangers (which – you’ve already addressed).

Grizabella said:

Charge by donation by putting out a "karma jar". Let them pay as they can or as they feel is fair. That works out very well, and that way you're not thinking you've charged them unfairly if the reading doesn't work out as well as you hoped it would.

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BTW, I make killer karma jars.

Yes! My beautiful Karma Jar was uppermost in my mind while posting that and I meant to mention it but then didn't after all. I have a fever and a headache today, so I'm not functioning at 100% at the moment.

canid made me the most beautiful Karma Jar! I don't have a way to post a picture of it at the moment, but it's absolutely gorgeous, with a gypsy dancing and Swarovski crystals strategically placed on it. I love it and can't wait to start using it. Check her thread out in the Advertisement thread.

I remember coming home from my first paid reading so thrilled to have this cash in my hand, so excited that someone thought my readings were worth money. Then I actually counted the money and found that I had not received what I had asked for. I had asked for $20. She gave me $60.

I phoned her to make sure it wasn't a mistake. It wasn't. She felt the reading was worth what she paid, not what I had asked.

After doing paid readings for 6+ years now, I no longer have any problem in telling people what I charge or asking them for payment (in advance, no less). Like anything we're not used to doing, it just takes practice. I would encourage you to think back to anything else you've done that took a bit of practice before you were thoroughly comfortable with it--driving a car, perhaps, or even reading the cards for others. After a while, it becomes second nature.

I'd also encourage you to role-play stating your fee out loud and asking for payment in different scenarios (perhaps with a friend or family member) until you feel comfortable doing so. People will expect you, as a professional, to be comfortable with stating your fees and accepting payment. If you are comfortable, they will feel comfortable with the vibes you're giving out. After all, if you seem uneasy about charging, they may read it as you being uneasy with doing the reading itself!

And even though you are doing this out of financial necessity I would encourage you to purchase something lasting with at least a portion of your first proceeds, so that you have a memento of this important occasion. My husband encouraged me to do this. I bought a tiny oil painting on ebay that I treasure to this day, and I can still feel the joy and the pride I felt when I looked at it and thought, "That is from the reading I did."

Good luck!