Supporting unhealthy obsessions…

**opens a can of worms**

I have been thinking about this a lot lately as I have decided to read proffessionally and it has been playing on my mind. If we keep reading on the same subject for a person over and over again, especially when we know the answers the same, are we therefore supporting unhealthy obessions…is it like supplying an alcoholic drink?

Are some readers helping people in a vulnerable situation become dependent on them by performing repeat readings?

all discussions welcomed!

Nik

I have refused to read for a client I know goes not only to me but to other readers at least every second day and often every day. She always is interested in the same situation, the message is always the same, she is never prepared to do the recommended work to change the outcome, she always leaves in tears (me and other readers, so it's not my style). The following day, she will have another reading with another reader to try and find a different answer. She *easily* sinks $100 or more a week in readings she disregards, and given that she doesn't act on what she hears and therefore likely outcomes are likely to stay unchanged, it seems to me not only as if readers who accept her busness are pandering to an addiction, but that she has some really serious actions to take in her life first before another reading could possibly be of use to her.

People like that, though, are in a minority, thankfully.

Well yes/no lol

People do become addicted to asking the same question over and over because they are hoping to get the answer they desire--eventually.

It's always a find line to dance along I think.

Do you have responsibility FOR them and what they ask. I used to go with that, but the my truth is that they are responsible for themselves.

My issue with the whole thing is that I just get sick of answering "it" over and over. I've had some so-called friends who don't speak to me any more because I had said, "I'm not doing another reading for you about that."

However, they weren't paying either and I do feel it's different to say forget it. That's a case of using me .

I think it's all a personal thing. I mean the Dr. doesn't tell you not to come back if your ankle still hurts, the chiropractor wants you to come in with your pain 2-3 times a week.

I don't think emotional pain with a reader is really any different.

214red said:

Are some readers helping people in a vulnerable situation become dependent on them by performing repeat readings?

all discussions welcomed!

Nik

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Well, Nik, I do think when you do repeat readings it is helping someone become dependent. Unfortunately, as a professional reader, I dont think the obsession will end with someone simply asking you and multiple readers the same question. I think you'll also meet people who are genuinely obsessed with other people and will ask you EVERY aspect of that person's life. I have read for a few people who had to know every aspect of a specific person's life (from how that person is feeling this very minute to what they'll be doing/ feeling tomorrow, the day after, ect).

it seems to me that when you read professionally it is a good idea to have a stated code of ethics that you present in writing and go over with all new clients. this type of situation could be addressed in this material it seems to me. some people can understand an issue when it is in the hypothetical better than when it is them. if you can refer back to the hypothetical they previously understood they may be more likely to see the problem when it is their specific case. though I wouldn't hold my breath for this, it does give you an out that is objectively stated. "My policy is ..." blah blah blah.

I don't think it is particularly ethical to continue to read for a person who you know is working out of an obsession. it would be like taking money from a baby.

pasara said:

I don't think it is particularly ethical to continue to read for a person who you know is working out of an obsession. it would be like taking money from a baby.

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What does a baby care for money?

And what if they keep coming back and asking the same question because they just don't get it? And this time,....this one time,......they get it. They get the message and all becomes clear.

What happened? Did the sitter wise up? Did you present the answer differently? Or did the Universe decide to give you the message in a way that the sitter could finally understand?

What I think we as readers forget is that you can't really choose the question that pops out. Sure you can have all sorts of policies and crap like that and a *code of ethics* *salutes the code with a raspberry,*, but bottom line it is all about choice. We are there as the messengers, no matter what the question is,....no matter how many times its been asked by the same person that comes in. I guarantee you, they know they are being obsessive.

IMO you can't say to a sitter, you can't ask this or that again, that's like a doctor saying "sorry, you can't have a broken leg", even though you aren't walking, or a psychiatrist saying sorry, you can't have a psychosis even though you are baying at the moon. (Just an example folks, don't get upset). People are what they are and they are going to ask 19,000 times what does he/she think of me as many times as it takes in order to get (understand) the answer.

Okay folks, mileage is gonna vary on this post.

ETA: Code of ethics for me is just good 'ol common sense.

I might be going to make myself hugely unpopular here but I think comparing Tarot reading to medical professionals (doctors, chiropractors, psychiatrist!) is simply ridiculous. These professionals are actually are bound by ethics, rules and regulations.

I don't see how one point can be the sitters are repsonsible for themselves and in no way a readers responsibility and then another compares being a reader as on a par with a doctor. Doesn't make sense to me common or otherwise.

irisa

irisa said:

I might be going to make myself hugely unpopular here but I think comparing Tarot reading to medical professionals (doctors, chiropractors, psychiatrist!) is simply ridiculous. These professionals are actually are bound by ethics, rules and regulations.

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And I make a point of behaving as though I am, too. Better safe than sorry.

irisa said:

I might be going to make myself hugely unpopular here but I think comparing Tarot reading to medical professionals (doctors, chiropractors, psychiatrist!) is simply ridiculous. These professionals are actually are bound by ethics, rules and regulations.

irisa

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Tarot readers are supposed to be, too..but I agree with you. I think its a bit much to compare doctors to tarot readers, too...unless we impact people and play a bigger part in people's well being than I realize? after reading around the forum, I'm beginning to think that maybe being a reader holds more responsibility than I thought...