I think I have Tarot Bulimia

hunter

Binge and purge. Binge and purge. Ugh!
 

cardlady22

(((hunter))) It's all in how you look at things. You pass a lot of them on to friends/acquaintances, right? And you learn something about yourself with each deck that passes through your fingers. I'm the opposite end: must resist becoming a Tarot Pack-Rat!
 

tarotberry

I guess this means I'm a compulsive over-eater then...I can't seem to purge the ones I don't like! :D
 

thorhammer

It sorts itself out after a while. First you learn not to purge. Then the collection swells (kind of like retaining water :D). Then you panic about the space issue.

Then you start to be more discriminating in your acquisitions.

It's a cycle, trust it and go with it. You learn *stuff* along the way.

\m/ Kat
 

hunter

Why do I feel so much more guilty about tarot than regular books?

If I buy 10 books on assertiveness training, devour them, pass 8 of them on and keep my favorite 2, I feel no guilt whatsoever, especially if I was able to get them used.

But if I buy 3 animal oracles, use them for hours a day for months and then give away 2 and keep one, I feel like I have done something wrong.

Is it because the learning process with tarot is so much more pleasurable than with regular books? The pretty pictures and the bit sized nugget style learning makes learning fun. Where with many of my other recovery studies it is all toil?

Maybe I feel guilty having fun while learning and only think I have the right to spend money on learning/recovery that isn't pleasurable.

My tarot purchases remind me of eating disorders :-( Maybe because some of us relate to anything pleasurable with guilt? That messed up idea that we are not supposed to feel pleasure or take up any room?

I know how much I have learned from my tarot and oracles. I only started in late winter I think, maybe spring, and I know I am not even recognizable, I have changed so much. Yes, some changes are also from my chakra and rituals studies, but even that started with the Bird Signs Oracle and the Medicine Cards. The Way of the Horse oracle and it's bibliography literally changed my life in being able to understand and describe my episodes of dissociation.

I'm very careful to shop around and wait till I get a deck for the right price and I don't buy impulsively except for a couple super cheap decks to fill out an order at discountnewagebooks.

Many of my decks were gifts. I even feel guilty about those :-0 What is that about?

Disgust, guilt, ugh!!!

How do we know when we are on track with our purchases? A long distance runner needs more food than a sedentary one. When we are running marathons, how do we not feel guilty feeding our ravenous appetite.
 

SolSionnach

thorhammer said:
It sorts itself out after a while. First you learn not to purge. Then the collection swells (kind of like retaining water :D). Then you panic about the space issue.

Then you start to be more discriminating in your acquisitions.

It's a cycle, trust it and go with it. You learn *stuff* along the way.

\m/ Kat
This post needs to be a sticky! Kat, you are so spot on. Yes, you learn a LOT along the way.

I love how hunter re-homes decks. Brava!
 

AJ

hunter said:
Why do I feel so much more guilty about tarot than regular books?

great question. Human nature...ain't we odd though?
 

emmsma

My binge purchases are dwindling, but I haven't been able to release much of anything. It feels horrible, but when I look at my decks and/or list to see what I can let go of - I'm unable to go through with it.

I'd happily be bulimic. This compulsive collecting and hoarding is so sad!
 

SolSionnach

emmsma said:
My binge purchases are dwindling, but I haven't been able to release much of anything. It feels horrible, but when I look at my decks and/or list to see what I can let go of - I'm unable to go through with it.

I'd happily be bulimic. This compulsive collecting and hoarding is so sad!
Be careful what you wish for!

If you read around here, nothing is much worse than re-purchasing decks at a premium...
 

Miss Divine

emmsma said:
My binge purchases are dwindling, but I haven't been able to release much of anything. It feels horrible, but when I look at my decks and/or list to see what I can let go of - I'm unable to go through with it.

I'd happily be bulimic. This compulsive collecting and hoarding is so sad!

If you're not able to let go of any decks, then why would you?
I only let decks go which I don't use, and CAN let go without a problem.
Nothing sad about having a nice collection of decks emmsma. I love my decks :D
Just enjoy them!