You want to ask what? You do realize this is my first reading.. don't you?

Last night I was approached in an online world by someone who knew I read cards. I have pulled cards for friends, but of my own wish to help them, they were never sitting with me firing questions at me to ask for them.

So this person corners me, he needs help and guidance. I tell him I'd be willing to try, but I've not read for anyone like that before. So we chat for a bit and get a feel for the right questions. My cards are super responsive.. cutting themselves and listening and telling intently. It was a good knowing it was making sense to him. Then I guess he'd found a trust or connection so he half jokingly said.. ask your cards if I'd be better off with a gun to my head! EEEP. He did not say it with hatred, remorse or any sense of loss, it was just an avenue he felt comfortable enough to ask, half joking but half at his wits end, struggling to cope with life and open to all. Thank goodness I'm okay with some uncomfortable topics.

I considered for a moment side stepping and not pulling a card, but then I thought why side step. I put myself aside, trusted my cards and let the cards work. The card I pulled couldn't have been better. And he was happy with the reading enough to "tip" me. Totally unexpected, not light and easy first sitter, but one that will always linger. I hope he feels a little more hope today.

So now that I'm here (not here as in AT, but here as in this phase of tarot), .. getting tough questions from querents, what's the hardest type of question you've gotten, how did you react? Are there deep/difficult questions best to refuse to answer?

SakuraFae said:

So now that I'm here (not here as in AT, but here as in this phase of tarot), .. getting tough questions from querents, what's the hardest type of question you've gotten, how did you react?

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The weirdest kind of question I have ever gotten was, "what can I do to make sure that he always suffers for what he did to me?" I honestly didn't know what to say or even if I should read such a question. So I told the sitter to ask a different question.

SakuraFae said:

Are there deep/difficult questions best to refuse to answer?

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Yes, the kind you mentioned.

I go to weekly tarot class/workshop. This weeks homework is to ask a serious and highly personal question and it must not be for ourselves. It has to be for someone we are connected with and to so like a friend or family member. This next weeks topic is learning to remove yourself from another person's reading and how to read clearly for a difficult question.

So far my most difficult question was about a friend's husband's health. I really don't care for health related questions because I'm not a doctor you know. For her I did. She just wanted to know if his doctors would finally come up with a diagnosis because they both felt he was getting the run around. I remember so clearly the first card I pulled was Justice reversed and then the other 4 cards were something along the lines of that seemed like they would figure it out and I felt it was an intern (due to the appearance of a page) that would piece the puzzle together. sure enough one night they ended up in the ER and got some intern who said you know I just read this article in this journal about such and such. He was the first doctor willing to actually listen.

SakuraFae said:

Then I guess he'd found a trust or connection so he half jokingly said.. ask your cards if I'd be better off with a gun to my head! EEEP. He did not say it with hatred, remorse or any sense of loss, it was just an avenue he felt comfortable enough to ask, half joking but half at his wits end, struggling to cope with life and open to all.

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olivia1 said:

The weirdest kind of question I have ever gotten was, "what can I do to make sure that he always suffers for what he did to me?" I honestly didn't know what to say or even if I should read such a question. So I told the sitter to ask a different question.

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I've heard these stories but thanfully have never gotten these kinds of questions in my readings. The most difficult question I have gotten was someone asking a yes/no question and I don't do those so I need to help them rephrase it when that comes up.

But if I did get a question like those two above I think my answer would be more or less the same.

I would tell the querent that I cannot ask that question. I would tell them that Tarot is a spiritual tool and it is not appropriate for me to ask something unspiritual of it. In the first case, I would tell him there is no need to do the reading to ask that question as the universe never wants us to put a gun to our heads. Spiritual law is towards love, joy and abundance, never towards fear and pain based reactions. I'd tell them something along the lines of: " Now if you'd care to rephrase that in a way that will help teach you how to solve your problems, and find the love and joy in your situation and within yourself, then we can do that instead. I'll help you if you want."

As for the second, Wow those are both tough questions, again I'd need to tell them that Tarot is a spiritual tool and it is not meant to be used for unspiritual purposes. We live in a love based universe, where the central energy of the all is love. Another spiritual law is karma. And if they take that path they just mentioned the end result is they will ultimately likely cause more harm to themselves than to the other. I would not read on that question, but I would ask them if they would like me to do a reading for them on how to let go of any painful feelings about the other, so that they no longer feel that desire.

In either case they can agree to a more spiritual topic of not that will help heal them, not bring them more pain. But I can't force them They have the free will to choose a path that is going to lead them to more pain if they wish. I can just warn them that is where they are heading, but they can take me up on a more spiritual reading or walk away. It's their choice.

But yes, I would refuse to answer either of those questions as is.

...Oh wait, I remember what my most difficult question I got was. It was for a friend at work. Her son-in-law had a brain tumor and was going soon for an operation. They were not at all sure he would survive, as it was a hard operation. She wanted me to do her a reading to ask if he was going to survive his operation and heal.

My first thought was the operation was coming up on two weeks, what if the answer was no. How would that make her feel, would that make her feel better or worse to know that first. I felt like she'd be happier having hope. Not to mention suppose it said no and things changed and it was wrong!

I sat her down and told her the Tarot cards WILL tell her the answer but that once I pull the cards I am not responsible for what they say. They could say that he would thrive or that he would not make it through. I told her I do not know in advance what they will say and that it is just my job to tell her what they say when the come up. I asked her "Are you SURE, really sure, that you want to know, no matter what the cards say?" If you are I will do you the reading. Then she got really scared and told me she did not want to know.

And I think I did the right thing. Because they could say he would die and she had in the end say she was not yet emotionally ready to hear that or to deal with it. So I think I did the right thing. I think before we lay anything very emotionally heavy on someone, we need to make sure they are emotionally ready to handle it.

Babs

I've gotten, will I cheat on my wife? Strange..

SunChariot said:

I would tell the querent that I cannot ask that question. I would tell them that Tarot is a spiritual tool and it is not appropriate for me to ask something unspiritual of it. In the first case, I would tell him there is no need to do the reading to ask that question as the universe never wants us to put a gun to our heads. Spiritual law is towards love, joy and abundance, never towards fear and pain based reactions. I'd tell them something along the lines of: " Now if you'd care to rephrase that in a way that will help teach you how to solve your problems, and find the love and joy in your situation and within yourself, then we can do that instead. I'll help you if you want."

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This is great advice. This is exactly what I would do.

I've never gotten a question like that. Lots of "should I leave my husband/wife" though. Sometimes the answer is YES! Sometimes it's no. I don't answer health related questions. Against my better judgment I've done readings on the outcome of pending court cases and custody disputes. I had to tell a querent once that the father of her children would soon be in jail... THAT was tough. But it turned out better for her in the end.

Had an elderly lady want to know who was going to die first, her or her husband. You see, she wanted to go last, not because she was afraid of dying, but because if she'd spent X years being slobbered all over by this guy she damn well deserved to inherit his money, which was substantial, and she earned all her own money (which was also substantial) herself before she married, so she didn't want him to outlive her and get to spend her money.

I squirmed.

LavenderMist said:

I've gotten, will I cheat on my wife? Strange..

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That is strange as the decision is totally in his hands.

Some people (non-readers) seem to think that whatever the cards say is destined to happen and cannot be changed. They seem to think that there is only one future that is destined to happen and that that future cannot be changed or avoided no matter what you do. ..that there is a set future they are heading towards and that they can't get away from it any more than a train can leave its tracks. Your querent seemed to be one of those. But our the perspective of being a reader and knowing how the future really works, it does sound quite strange.

That is one reason some people are so afraid of having Tarot readings. They are afraid of being told something terrible that cannot be changed. What I find strange is when I tell them it is not like that and they can change their future, and that predicted future can be changed that scares them too and they would rather hold onto their old view of life.

Babs

LavenderMist said:

I've gotten, will I cheat on my wife? Strange..

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They were asking for permission. They already had it in mind, maybe even had a particular person in mind, and wanted you to tell them stuff like: will they get caught out, will it be fun without any complications, etc.

nisaba said:

They were asking for permission. They already had it in mind, maybe even had a particular person in mind, and wanted you to tell them stuff like: will they get caught out, will it be fun without any complications, etc.

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I had that thought too. Because if you say yes they will cheat on their wives...they can do it with a free conscience and tell themselves it was destiny, it was in the cards, and as such could not be avoided, so it was not their fault. Then maybe in their minds they do not have to feel guilt as they likely beleive they can't escape their destiny.