SloughSister
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Helpful, encouraging tips for first not-just-guinea-pigs reading?
Empath111
I have never done this so i don't have a lot of tips, but I wanted to say have a good time!
The one thing I see when I get reads here, is that the reader sets the tone and that seems to make things easier on everyone. For example.."please ask a question that is not in a yes/no format". I guess put your guidelines in place- it will make all more comfortable.
The next thing I would suggest is having a quiet spot in the home..and a prior do a lot of grounding/centering work
Have fun!! Let us know how it goes
The one thing I see when I get reads here, is that the reader sets the tone and that seems to make things easier on everyone. For example.."please ask a question that is not in a yes/no format". I guess put your guidelines in place- it will make all more comfortable.
The next thing I would suggest is having a quiet spot in the home..and a prior do a lot of grounding/centering work
Have fun!! Let us know how it goes
SloughSister
I have never done this so i don't have a lot of tips, but I wanted to say have a good time!
The one thing I see when I get reads here, is that the reader sets the tone and that seems to make things easier on everyone. For example.."please ask a question that is not in a yes/no format". I guess put your guidelines in place- it will make all more comfortable.
The next thing I would suggest is having a quiet spot in the home..and a prior do a lot of grounding/centering work
Have fun!! Let us know how it goes
Thank, you, empath111!
Torkie
Hah, I am a wealth of information If I may flatter myself, I have recently moved out of the early guinea-pig stage and in to the "fairly competent" stage.
• Guidelines are good, as mentioned. You don't need to lay *everything* out (as I have tried to do), but yes, stuff like "no yes/no questions" is helpful. Here's what I tell people:
> Even if it's not a happy answer, I have to tell you. (So if you don't want to have a bad time, don't ask about something you think might end up badly!)
> Some topics I just won't touch.
[you might add,]
> You know I'm new, so there might be stuff I can't figure out at this point.
• Keep the spreads small and manageable, no more than 5 cards I'd say.
> Yesterday I laid out a freeform spread for a friend without knowing the question. It was 10 cards and the whole thing lasted well over an hour.
• Limit how many spreads people get at one time.
> I've had people monopolize my time when others wanted a reading (at a similar party setting, I imagine - I was not charging). So say early on something to the effect of, "I'm only doing 1/2/3 spreads at a time." [also, you may want to put the cards down and take a break! at this party setting I did not limit myself and read cards for 3 hours straight without doing anything else]
• Speaking of spreads, have some ready!
> At a different party, I did not bring my spread notes. I attempted a large spread I created (28 cards), but unfortunately forgot some of the position meanings, and had to end up telling the sitter I just couldn't finish. Urg!
> Take with you a few spreads that cover most situations. If you don't have any, I can provide a very easy 5-card spread that works for almost every situation.
> I can't imagine you will need more than 2 or 3 spreads.
> Be honest if you don't have a spread, or can't put one together, for a certain question. ("Sorry, I don't have a past life spread with me right now, but here's my email if you want to get together later...")
• Don't be afraid to say no.
> Sometimes you need a break, don't feel comfortable with a question, or anything - just say no. People won't be offended if you aren't mean about it.
• Be prepared for...
> People offering you tips. Whether you will accept them or not, prepare a one-liner. ("Oh thank you, but I'm so new at this, I just don't feel comfortable with tips or anything like that right now." or, "Thank you very much! Like they say, do what you love and the money will come." You know, stuff like that.)
> People asking questions you don't have the answer to, and this is always best solved by being honest rather than trying to scratch together an answer.
> Straight up getting the cards wrong. ("Wow, what a surprise! That blindsided me, I think this card warrants a little more studying..." or if you know the card does not relate and it is a "true" mistake, "Wow, what a surprise! From what I know this card doesn't relate at all to that situation. I think this spread is having a go at me!")
> Reading exhaustion. I don't know how much reading you've done or for how long in one session, but you may find out this lovely side effect. Best solution: grounding, if you know how, a nice half-hour break, a non-caffeinated drink, and some (healthy as possible) food.
> There being a line forming for your readings. I suggest not allowing more than 2-3 people to be queued up. If another asks, "I'd love to give you a reading a little later on, sure! I'll find you when I'm ready."
> People wanting a reading, but having NO IDEA what to ask. I find a good solution is to tell them, "Just focus on something you want more information on."
• Don't be afraid to ask people if they want a reading, if you feel like it and no one volunteers. I've never met a person who was offended if I ask, and most people are happier for the experience.
• If you can't help everyone who wants a reading, write down for them your number, e-mail, or whatever, and offer to set up a reading later [of course, this is only if you really want to and are interested in building up a clientele in the future. I find I get many repeat readers this way, and now I have a sitter whenever I want to read.] Also consider doing this for people who really enjoyed their readings.
This is all just from my experience! Reading at parties is a great time, and a fun experience for everyone involved. If some people are very impressed with your work or how fun it is, offer to appear at their events free of charge - if you yourself liked the experience and want to have more fresh faces to read for.
If I may flatter myself, I have recently moved out of the early guinea-pig stage and in to the "fairly competent" stage.• Guidelines are good, as mentioned. You don't need to lay *everything* out (as I have tried to do), but yes, stuff like "no yes/no questions" is helpful. Here's what I tell people:
> Even if it's not a happy answer, I have to tell you. (So if you don't want to have a bad time, don't ask about something you think might end up badly!)
> Some topics I just won't touch.
[you might add,]
> You know I'm new, so there might be stuff I can't figure out at this point.
• Keep the spreads small and manageable, no more than 5 cards I'd say.
> Yesterday I laid out a freeform spread for a friend without knowing the question. It was 10 cards and the whole thing lasted well over an hour.
• Limit how many spreads people get at one time.
> I've had people monopolize my time when others wanted a reading (at a similar party setting, I imagine - I was not charging). So say early on something to the effect of, "I'm only doing 1/2/3 spreads at a time." [also, you may want to put the cards down and take a break! at this party setting I did not limit myself and read cards for 3 hours straight without doing anything else]
• Speaking of spreads, have some ready!
> At a different party, I did not bring my spread notes. I attempted a large spread I created (28 cards), but unfortunately forgot some of the position meanings, and had to end up telling the sitter I just couldn't finish. Urg!
> Take with you a few spreads that cover most situations. If you don't have any, I can provide a very easy 5-card spread that works for almost every situation.
> I can't imagine you will need more than 2 or 3 spreads.
> Be honest if you don't have a spread, or can't put one together, for a certain question. ("Sorry, I don't have a past life spread with me right now, but here's my email if you want to get together later...")
• Don't be afraid to say no.
> Sometimes you need a break, don't feel comfortable with a question, or anything - just say no. People won't be offended if you aren't mean about it.
• Be prepared for...
> People offering you tips. Whether you will accept them or not, prepare a one-liner. ("Oh thank you, but I'm so new at this, I just don't feel comfortable with tips or anything like that right now." or, "Thank you very much! Like they say, do what you love and the money will come." You know, stuff like that.)
> People asking questions you don't have the answer to, and this is always best solved by being honest rather than trying to scratch together an answer.
> Straight up getting the cards wrong. ("Wow, what a surprise! That blindsided me, I think this card warrants a little more studying..." or if you know the card does not relate and it is a "true" mistake, "Wow, what a surprise! From what I know this card doesn't relate at all to that situation. I think this spread is having a go at me!")
> Reading exhaustion. I don't know how much reading you've done or for how long in one session, but you may find out this lovely side effect. Best solution: grounding, if you know how, a nice half-hour break, a non-caffeinated drink, and some (healthy as possible) food.
> There being a line forming for your readings. I suggest not allowing more than 2-3 people to be queued up. If another asks, "I'd love to give you a reading a little later on, sure! I'll find you when I'm ready."
> People wanting a reading, but having NO IDEA what to ask. I find a good solution is to tell them, "Just focus on something you want more information on."
• Don't be afraid to ask people if they want a reading, if you feel like it and no one volunteers. I've never met a person who was offended if I ask, and most people are happier for the experience.
• If you can't help everyone who wants a reading, write down for them your number, e-mail, or whatever, and offer to set up a reading later [of course, this is only if you really want to and are interested in building up a clientele in the future. I find I get many repeat readers this way, and now I have a sitter whenever I want to read.] Also consider doing this for people who really enjoyed their readings.
This is all just from my experience! Reading at parties is a great time, and a fun experience for everyone involved. If some people are very impressed with your work or how fun it is, offer to appear at their events free of charge - if you yourself liked the experience and want to have more fresh faces to read for.
Torkie
Ah, a PS for you:
I learn traditional card meanings, spreads, and lore at home. I learn everything else when I read, usually for long periods of time.
So, consider taking a small note pad with you and make notes of common trends. ("It seems like when I do present/past/future spreads, it doesn't work out nearly as well as when I do cause/effect spreads," and so on.) This is also an excellent time for noting differences in your decks, if you have more than one.
Early on, doing a string of readings all day here on AT, I retired my Robin Wood from all relationship questions. And at my last party I finally realized that my RWS simply isn't suited for anything more than generalizations, and I retired an experimental spread that wasn't working out.
Also, if you have more than one deck, take them all with you and let the sitter choose which. Not all sitters appreciate all decks (especially if you have a gothic/dark deck, or one with a theme not everyone might relate to).
[PPS: No offense meant to your reading skills, but this is a problem I often ran in to: I would read the cards individually and as a group, but I often forgot to summarize the whole spread, even if it was small. Now whenever I finish reading the spread, I offer a summary and ask if they have questions or comments.
To create a more interactive experience, I ask the sitters to comment on cards that stand out to them before I start reading, while I am also taking a look at the layout. I encourage my sitters to comment on my narrative if they so desire.]
I learn traditional card meanings, spreads, and lore at home. I learn everything else when I read, usually for long periods of time.
So, consider taking a small note pad with you and make notes of common trends. ("It seems like when I do present/past/future spreads, it doesn't work out nearly as well as when I do cause/effect spreads," and so on.) This is also an excellent time for noting differences in your decks, if you have more than one.
Early on, doing a string of readings all day here on AT, I retired my Robin Wood from all relationship questions. And at my last party I finally realized that my RWS simply isn't suited for anything more than generalizations, and I retired an experimental spread that wasn't working out.
Also, if you have more than one deck, take them all with you and let the sitter choose which. Not all sitters appreciate all decks (especially if you have a gothic/dark deck, or one with a theme not everyone might relate to).
[PPS: No offense meant to your reading skills, but this is a problem I often ran in to: I would read the cards individually and as a group, but I often forgot to summarize the whole spread, even if it was small. Now whenever I finish reading the spread, I offer a summary and ask if they have questions or comments.
To create a more interactive experience, I ask the sitters to comment on cards that stand out to them before I start reading, while I am also taking a look at the layout. I encourage my sitters to comment on my narrative if they so desire.]
veniteangeli
This was an incredible post IMO and I'm glad I found it and read it. Would you be okay with sharing the 5 card spread you mentioned? Something that size sounds perfect for what I'm looking for - a little more depth than my three card forays, but less intimidating than a Celtic Cross!
-venite angeli
SloughSister
Torkie, how incredibly kind of you. That is exactly the kind of experience I was looking for you. You had so many good ideas!
I had planned on taking my whole meager collection of decks (okay, without the beautiful Feng Shui, which is still in hiding or in some other being's hands somewhere), laying out guidelines, asking for their impressions, remembering to drink and snack, and taking several breaks. I had been going to limit to 7 cards but yes, you're exactly right, I'll use 5 as a limit. Questions I won't or can't do, saying no, tips, having a line, or bringing a notebook I simply hadn't thought of so I'm grateful you brought those up. And, of course, I'm worried about getting it wrong - but that's the great thing about old-time 12-step groups = people are pretty understanding and those I already know understand my tarot naivete.
For me, this a four-fold exercise - to practice, to see where my strengths and weaknesses lie, to gain confidence, but, most importantly, to pay back and pass on what was freely given to me - my first reading in January that started me on this adventure. I wish there were a smilie to wai you with - instead, thanks again.
I had planned on taking my whole meager collection of decks (okay, without the beautiful Feng Shui, which is still in hiding or in some other being's hands somewhere), laying out guidelines, asking for their impressions, remembering to drink and snack, and taking several breaks. I had been going to limit to 7 cards but yes, you're exactly right, I'll use 5 as a limit. Questions I won't or can't do, saying no, tips, having a line, or bringing a notebook I simply hadn't thought of so I'm grateful you brought those up. And, of course, I'm worried about getting it wrong - but that's the great thing about old-time 12-step groups = people are pretty understanding and those I already know understand my tarot naivete.
For me, this a four-fold exercise - to practice, to see where my strengths and weaknesses lie, to gain confidence, but, most importantly, to pay back and pass on what was freely given to me - my first reading in January that started me on this adventure. I wish there were a smilie to wai you with - instead, thanks again.
