Accepting The Reading

LovelyMissAries

This is something I've been muddled on for a long time and finally got the courage to ask. I was wondering if we have to accept the first answer we're given when being read for with Tarot cards, even if it contradicts our feelings. In my case I met somebody I have a strong connection with but the reading I was given didn't convey that. However, the reading wasn't completely inaccurate either. After other readings by different readers on the same subject (but not the same question) the tone of the cards has vastly improved. However, I was wondering if they are now just being sarcastic because I asked about the subject itself too many times and are now just displaying what I think is correct. The cards I'm getting are unbelievably good.

My question is... if we don't accept the first answer because we don't agree with it due to having different feelings about the situation, does that mean the reading is wrong? Does it have more of a final say than further readings on the same subject?
 

Stephys_Cool

Lol! I have this same issue! That's awesome. Hi! I'm a tarot noob. X rune reader. I lost my runes. The only thing I have to say is at times I have recognized connections between others and I've had sooo many misinterprettations of that person, and trust me I am rather sensitive. In being said, I am supporting the first answer you received. The tarot cards get very sarcastic with me as well. What I think you need to do is clear your mind and say (I just recently did this) hey so for real... final time (you have to mean it) what do you honestly think. But I do believe the first is usually correct. But also I would like to point out that cards show us both good and bad and rather you just go find out for yourself but to protect yourself soon as u see the card was showing you the main picture you must move away or you will be punished until you do so. So I'm saying .... in a way.... test out the cards. In order to figure out how they work for you you must experience and see the outcome for yourself. In doing so I'm saying keep that first card in mind because I know tarot. And its right. Just u must now figure out how. I hope you like my advice :)
 

Jes

Sometimes, when we focus too much on a subject or question and we read, argue or disagree with the cards, re shuffle and re read then things can become confusing.
I think its more because we have conflicting feelings and are trying to find the answers we want, not the answer or guidence we need.

Sometimes, doing a reading, and NOT reading it, just pulling the cards, then a few hours later coming back to it with a clear head can help. You wont have to re-do the reading because your mind and body have had time to process the cards without actually 'reading' them. When you DO sit to read them, you may find that you have clarity on things because the cards and fresh insights on the question/focus have sunk in a little, and have not been forced by on the spot intensity. things that may not have made sense on the spot, may make more sense after sinking in and letting the unconcious mind digest it a little... is this making sense to you? lol

Usually suggestions are made not to re read about the same subject too often.... but everyone is different, go with what works for you.... but approach it with clarity and willinginess to see what you are being shown, not what you *want* to see.
 

Suzanne A

If someone does a reading for you and you feel that they really got it wrong, I think that is legitimate. Even the best readers can be off, and the value of the reading is for you to judge. I would agree with Jes and Stephys that you should give the first reading a chance. Let it sink in, think about any possibility that the reader saw something that you were missing. And, even if you feel the reader got it wrong, I would make note of the cards and the spread and think about whether the cards have a message for you that just did not get communicated well in the reading. I'm of the opinion that repeated readings on the same question in a short period just lead to confusion. I don't know if I feel that the cards get sarcastic, but I do think that sometimes they will tell you something like--you know the answer, stop asking and let it rest for a while.

How long a while, well that depends on the circumstances and how fast things are changing.
 

nortytiger

Hi starlight, I have done this myself when I first started reading and I ended up confused and not knowing what the true answer is, which then made it feel pointless asking tarot in the first place. I lost confidence in the cards for a while because of this but the cards were right it was my way of thinking that was wrong and the fact that sometimes I just really wanted the cards to confirm what I believed but often they didn't.

I have re-trained myself to try and ask one really good question on the subject and accept the first answer that tarot gives. If I have other questions in the subject that are totally unrelated to the initial question then I do ask but if any other questions are along similar lines I don't ask. If I find myself obsessing about a subject and start looking at ways to rephrase the question so that I can justify asking the cards again because I want to convince myself that I'm "not asking the exact same question" then I put the cards away and wait until things become clearer in my own mind. Mostly I then find I already know the answer deep down and events unfold to confirm what the cards first said.

Tarot is like my best friend, but it is honest, often brutally so. Yes it often contradicts what I am expecting or wanting to hear. If I can't handle the truth then I don't ask. It is disappointing to hear the truth sometimes, it can crush our hopes and dreams but that way we can learn and grow so that we make better life decisions.
 

nisaba

This is something I've been muddled on for a long time and finally got the courage to ask. I was wondering if we have to accept the first answer we're given when being read for with Tarot cards, even if it contradicts our feelings.

A story I've told before a couple of times since I've been here.

Before I entered a relationship where I was very attracted, I did a quick spread for myself. I pulled a card which told me of lies, deception and possibly violence. I dismissed it, because I knew she had come from a troubled background, and I figured those were issues perpetrated by others towards her.

I was very attracted, as I said. I didn't see the red flag.

I went into the relationship. Within a month, I was surrounded by addicts and thieves, her friends. Within a few years I was stuck in an abusive relationship where I was basically under house arrest for years upon years, unable to leave the house, constantly supervised, having everything from kitchen-knives to claw-hammers and axes waved at me with deadly intent.

I just wish I'd ignored my attraction and my sense of being drawn to this person, took notice of the cards, and bloody run as far away as possible before it ever started. I would have saved myself a lot of injuries, a lot of property-loss, a lot of grief, and a lot of wasted years.

Lesson: never go against warning-signs. After all, Tarot is there to tell you the stuff you just can't see for yourself.
 

nortytiger

Lesson: never go against warning-signs. After all, Tarot is there to tell you the stuff you just can't see for yourself.

this one line sums it all up for me.

and wow nisaba what a story. what a terrible situation to have been in.
my eyes got wider and wider reading it and my mouth too!
 

Amanda

I think you should take the first message you get if it's from a reader you feel you can trust with your personal life.

I'm not condemning anyone, but this site is set up more for practice when doing readings for each other, and it doesn't totally allow someone to build personal trust with any one person. And I think that's kind of important between reader and sitter, if you actually want help, direction, and insight. And so readings aren't taken all that seriously around here in some places and done a number of times on the same thing by different readers, and so then shadow lives and people start to emerge playing on the sitters fears and hopes by their quickly changing thoughts and feelings about the matter from having so many readings done. That's why I've limited myself to monthly offerings... because I'd rather be a guide that can be trusted, and not someone "in the same boat" building "friendships" that are simply enabling to emotional distress.

If one doesn't trust a reader, then, why waste everyone's time and energy? My guess is that it's simply filling space and time to a deeper, emotional void going on... and so the reading is getting sucked into a black hole basically, never to be seen again or utilized properly to build on and actually make the positive changes needed.

So when do you 'accept' a reading? Well, when you can trust the reader. And if you don't trust the reader, I wouldn't suggest simply going to a different one. I would explain your feelings and find out why they got the cards they did and if they can elaborate... maybe they messed it up, and explaining your feelings will help them grow. Or maybe they are making intuitive connections that aren't so easily seen in the cards. If one is getting readings around here, where there are many different people on different levels of learning, one needs to be more discriminating in who they choose to allow to read for them on personal matters.

If you are paying for a reading by a professional, and nothing at all makes sense, ask for a refund.
 

214red

i think this is a good question, sometimes we wish to lie to ourselves because we dont wish to see whats there, we even ignore our feelings and suppress them. sometimes we read the cards wrongly.

it often comes down to how you feel, dont mistake that for your wishes and your dreams, or your own projections. take your feelings away and see how you feel, read your spread like you would for someone else, step away and read it later but from the opposite point of view (if you saw it as postive, see it as negative).

honesty is the most important thing with ourselves.

Sometimes we ask the wrong questions, at the wrong phase in relationships, sometimes at the start of somethiing when we meet someone we ask for their feelings, well they have known us for 5 mins and then we hate the fact the devil comes up.....devil can simply be lust, now you want a guy/girl to be attracted to you dont you? sometimes we should be taking one step at a time, because i do think if we have to learn a lesson in a relationship and we look like we might bail if there are bad cards, they will show us more positive ones so we learn the lesson....they dont lie, but they show the positive things up in the relationship. sometimes they will tell us the opposite of what is true to ask us to trust our feelings rather then a card......

think about what you want to know, ask relevant questions about the right time (dont ask if they are the one when your still only just dating....)in the relationship, accept whats given, and be honest with yourself
 

DownUnderNZer

Starlight09....

You know when someone is OFF...the bells inside ring loud...or you think it and know it.

But...there is a "difference" between NOT wanting to listen openly to a "reader" as unfortunately there are some sitters that only want to hear what they want to hear, or some sitters are too naive to see that some "readers" are "cold readers" that go off body language and the wording of a question, or that some "readers" do not have the right ethics or foundations, so when they "read" they are doing more damage than good.

If you cannot relate to the information given to you at all...you do not have to accept that reading....but if you are "avoiding" an ugly truth because you expected a "fairy tale" answer you should then be looking at yourself and your motives a little more closely.