How can you tell if you aren't connecting with your cards?

CelestialHorse

I feel like I am not connecting with my new Gilded deck. I don't know they give confusing answers, they don't seem accurate with validations.

Hopefully my Rider Waite I get will be connected to me.

Maybe this is karma for getting rid of my other 2 decks. Oops.

Anyway, how did you know when you didn't feel connected to your cards? What did you do about it?
 

emmsma

How new is your Gilded? If you've only just gotten it, you need to give yourself time to learn it a bit before saying you don't connect. Even if you know RW meanings, all decks are not exactly the same.

Work with it a bit. Get to know it.

When I started out with a new deck I'd try to spend a lot of time just looking at the images before jumping in to read with. I'd go through the deck, card by card, and try to think of all the things I see - all the meanings I could get from each one.

Then its easier to read with.

Just my way. Dunno if it would be the same for you.
 

Trogon

I guess this answers the question of how the new deck is working. ;)

For me, sometimes it does take a little bit of time to connect with a deck. Sometimes it's almost instantaneous. Rarely do I feel like I just have no connection at all with a deck, though it has happened twice. The first time was quite a few years ago ... I had gotten the Unicorn Tarot, just didn't connect & traded it to a friend who was having the same issue with her Dragon Tarot. The second time was with the Aquarian Tarot which was given to me by a very good friend when I gave him a set of Medicine Cars - I just didn't connect with it and recently gave it to someone on here.

Of course, your question is how did I know? Well, for the most part, I just wasn't really attracted to the art work in them. With the Unicorn, I just didn't feel that the images really worked with me for imparting any real meaning for me. The Aquarian, I could see the meanings, but I just wasn't attracted to art.

I agree with Emmsma that spending a bit of time with a new deck, even one you've had before, is a good idea and is likely to help you connect, or in this case, "reconnect" with the deck. This is also something I'll do with a deck I haven't used in a long time. Just going through the deck, enjoying the art connecting with the images, it may help. It helps me. :D

You might also try a "new deck reading". It's a 3-card reading I've been doing with my new decks for quite a while now. It's a 3-card spread, laid down vertically;

#1 - What will you teach me?
#2 - What do you need from me?
#3 - What will our "relationship" be like?

Here's the new deck reading I did on the Unicorn Tarot; http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?t=10596 - I ended up interpreting the reading as the deck not being a good one for me, and ultimately ended up trading it for one I did like better, so it worked out good.

In the case of your Gilded Tarot, since you had connected really well with a different copy of the same deck before, I'd think it might be worth giving it some time. It's a beautiful deck and very good for readings in my opinion (for whatever that's worth ;) ). I like mine anyway. :D
 

Dain

Sometimes it's a matter of "not the right time" for me. There have been decks I liked very much and when I bought them and tried them out, there was a sense of.... "it's just a bunch of pretty cards". (Well, they are, don't get me wrong but... you know what I mean!)
So I put the deck on a shelf and didn't work with it for a long time. Then, next time I tried it something had changed and I could connect with it.

On the other hand, there have been one or two decks that I couldn't connect with at all and I knew because there was no sense of flow or familiarity or a "welcoming" feeling from them. Or maybe it was just me. Anyhow, I gave them away as I knew I'd never be able to work with them or even like them.
 

SunChariot

I feel like I am not connecting with my new Gilded deck. I don't know they give confusing answers, they don't seem accurate with validations.

Hopefully my Rider Waite I get will be connected to me.

Maybe this is karma for getting rid of my other 2 decks. Oops.

Anyway, how did you know when you didn't feel connected to your cards? What did you do about it?

Exactly what you said. I know I am not connecting with a desk when I am not understanding it, it is not readlng well for me, is not being accurate,and is confusing or will only give me very brief mono-sylabic answers.

Of course you have to give it chance. You can't be sure in just one reading. But if it consistently is not working well, by the 3rd or 4th time I admit that it is not working and get ready to move on. It hasn't actually happened to me often, but it has happeend.

What I do about it,if it does not work well after a number of tries, trade it away here on AT so someone who will want it. Then I also get a nice new deck to work with. It's a win win situation.

But what Dain said is also true. It has happened to be twice that I could not read with a deck and no one wanted to trade for it. Then if felt like my destiny to keep it. SO I put it away. Then a year or so later I felt the call to read with each of them and they worked well and have ever since.

Babs
 

beekie

Anyway, how did you know when you didn't feel connected to your cards? What did you do about it?

My experience has been rather... weird. My first deck with also Gilded. I got great readings with it right off the bat, however my interest started to fade a bit. I wanted a deck i could really connect with so i got Pagan Cats. Im such a cat person, and sometimes when I read my cat would jump on my cards or lay on them when i'm reading, so this deck do I not only feel connected with... but it reminds me of my kitty :)

I bought Sweet Twilight earlier this year, and had difficulties reading with it. I put it away for a few months, but decided to dig it out a while back and got a great reading from it!

I think its kind of both. You will either hit it off right away (like my Pagan Cats) or you will connect with an unusual deck when the time is right
 

Padma

I got the Gilded as I loved the beautiful imagery. But I barely used them, as the deck felt to me so very cold. And when I tried to use it to read for others, they would always choose another deck for the reading, saying the Gilded felt cold to them. So it wasn't just me. I traded mine off for another deck.

Some people I know work really well with the Gilded, others not. Same with many decks - I think personally it is the artwork...I have also a Dragon Tarot and while I love the images and the readings are always pretty spot on, I feel - unconnected to the deck, and so I don't use it much. *shrug*

My only other word of advice is to join one of the "difficult deck" reading circles, and use the Gilded. I did that with my Gilded before I traded it, and I found that actually it had many small hints in the cards, tiny bits of images that sparked the intuition quite well. So it can give fab readings if you study every little detail (like Emmsma said) but I still traded it anyways. It may be a good deck, but if you don't like it, well, don't force yourself!
 

VGimlet

Sometimes I connect with a deck right away, and I know I am going to get great readings from it. I have had several decks with an instant connection.

Other times it takes longer, and I need to work with the cards for awhile.

Sometimes I put it away, work with a deck I do connect with and try again at a later date. Not connecting can be a lot of different things - the timing isn't right, my mood isn't right - or just no connection, for whatever reason.

If I try again later (YMMV on how long later is...) and I don't connect, well, I might try again even later, if I love, love love the deck. Or it might end up being a deck in my collection, rather than a reading deck. (If I wasn't a collector, it would end up in the 'to go' pile, LOL.)