I am stuck in a loop

I'm stuck! I spinn around and around.. It all makes me feel really heavy in mind. Yesterday I did a tarot reading about my upcomming day. This one that is. A also cast some stones reagarding the same but conserning another personen.
The stones where as accurat as one can ask for. They told me the current status and did not reveal the actual actions for the next day. That made me a bit disappointed.
The cards did quit well, exept for one part. Allrigth, it is more me then the cards.. I know.
But I can't feel good about the reading. It conserned me and my son and a schedule well know from other appointments. I know I must have put in my experience into the reading. So of course it did not come out well. Not at all untrue, but still..

This is what makes me stuck. My own feelings and abillity to know the future can tell me equally amount of information as the cards. This is making me feel to abandone the hole thing. But it is not how it should be.. I should be able to read out more, other things, specified information from the cards. And not just have it like a roundabout way. Because this is how it is today and I do not seem to get loose from the feeling. All I can do is to study the cards themself.. But no readings. And that is no fun.. I wanna start practise along with the studies..

With the upcomming tripp to greece. Stuck a month with my mom and sister.. I really need something else to do but talk to them.. Practising the cards was my thing to do to escape. I've got acess to internet there, but not nearly as much time as I need to ask for help, gidence or informaiton about tarot. So I need it badly now..

Thank you all for letting me write off a little. But I would need some kind words. Something to think about.
I do not like that my gut feeling is better of telling the future then my interpretation of the cards is.

The cards by the way was
2 of swords and 2 of cups.. If anyone was curious..

fantasymoon said:

With the upcomming tripp to greece. Stuck a month with my mom and sister.. I really need something else to do but talk to them.. Practising the cards was my thing to do to escape. I've got acess to internet there, but not nearly as much time as I need to ask for help, gidence or informaiton about tarot. So I need it badly now..

Thank you all for letting me write off a little. But I would need some kind words. Something to think about.
I do not like that my gut feeling is better of telling the future then my interpretation of the cards is.

The cards by the way was
2 of swords and 2 of cups.. If anyone was curious..

Click to expand...

Hejsan, Fantasymoon.

A maxim I would go by is the British medium/healer/psychic Betty Shine's "truism" that "a good clairvoyant can get a reading from a piece of string". Thus you should always trust your gut feeling. Wilma Carroll's book "The Two Hour Tarot Tutor" was one of the first books I read on the subject, and as a psychic she said that the way she developed was to throw away the book and look deeply into the cards themselves.

In one reading over the weekend, I read for my boyfriend and myself. In the near future part of the spread, I drew the (Morgan Greer) Five of Cups. We are planning a short break in Wales in mid- to late June: looking at the specific design on the specific card I saw the location I had in mind - a small island just off the north coast of Wales where I spent part of my childhood and haven't been back to since, so when my boyfriend suggested Wales I jumped at the chance to go back. The card's picture showed me the piece of sea between the island and the mainland - I mean, literally that stretch of coast - but the card is one of disappointment. Sure enough, my boyfriend later emailed me back to say that the particular resort is quite hard and expensive to get at, and there was a better destination on a main train line from his home town, and neither of us drive so it was best that we didn't go too far "off the beaten track". So I went with my gut feeling about the Five of Cups, which regularly comes up for me, since I am prone at times to looking at the glass half-empty rather than half-full.

The Two of Cups and the Two of Swords...it's a tricky one, but let's see.

I suspect that the Two of Swords represents a decision you have to make. Perhaps it is simply that you have to decide whether to trust the Tarot. It is where I started out too: do I throw myself to the wind and surf the waves of time, or do I let the rational parts of my brain dictate what is "possible" and "not possible". After I had a premonition of the death of an MP just by looking at the reflection of a digital clock radio in my bedroom mirror, I decided that I had "progressed" beyond that decision: I had taken the conscious step of being willing to see that even though the cards may only reflect present reality rather than the future.

When reading for my boyfriend it was a bit of an anti-climax for him as well: his response was "Well, nothing there I didn't know". But the beauty lies in the fact that the cards spelled out exactly what he was doing: cheating his employer by staying on sick leave longer than he really needs to with the collusion of his doctor: he drew the Four of Swords reversed (which is supposed to be a healing, restful card, but reversed...it suggested he wasn't giving his injured arm the rest it really needed, and thus was exacerbating the injury), followed by the Seven of Swords: which is the biggest hint that the cards knew what a double-dealing, cheeky, barefaced liar he can be at times. I was concerned that the Tower which came next in his spread predicted disaster for him, so I secretly asked the cards who would betray him. Up came the Two of Swords, which in my deck shows a picture of me: a woman with long dark hair, blindfolded to "reality" and trusting in her intuition to guide her, wearing lilac and blue, my favourite colours. (In fact I liked that card so much it was the whole reason why I bought the deck in the first place rather than more fancy ones like the Druidcraft or Goddess tarots!) And so it came to pass: I was in the bath the next morning when his employer rang. She could hear me sploshing about and asked him who was with him in his flat. Luckily he was such a cheeky liar that he managed to persuade her that his mum had come up to help him clean his flat!!! He also drew the Three of Coins, an indicator of study. In the post the morning afterwards he got a flyer for a management course his employers want him to go on (when he finally gets back to work!!!). So although the cards told him nothing new as such, the amazing thing for me was that they knew what was going on, both in the present and in the immediate future.

The Two of Cups - intimacy - might suggest that you need some time alone to think and get to know your cards well. Since you work well with your intuition, I really recommend Carroll's method: chuck out all your books on Tarot, take your favourite deck, and go through each card in turn and look at them in detail: what is in the card? - focussing on detail. Who is that? What does it remind you of? That's basically the "two hours" of the book's title - although it might seem a bit cheesy I recommend the book as Carroll goes into depth about her psychic experiences.

Similarly two is the number of beginning in the "progression" of Tarot. Thus for me I made the leap from Two of Swords to Queen of Rods in the space of a few weeks: when I get a new deck I always look for the card that pleases me most, take a colour photocopy of it, and stick it into my notebook. The Queen of Rods is a confident, serene woman who has overcome the original dilemma and has decided to put her faith in her intuition, rather than emotions (Cups), intellect (Swords) or material earthiness (Coins). The Twos show the beginning of a journey.

Let us know how you get on - and enjoy your holiday. I wish I could be going to Greece for a month, it is very very very miserable and wet here in the UK - only a week or so ago we were talking about a drought, and then right on cue the heavens opened and it hasn't stopped raining since Wednesday!!!

((((fantasymoon))))
Hey, what really ails you? The 2 of swords and the 2 of cups show that there is a decision in front of you, but it will be a decision with benefit, so no need to worry.

Now enjoy your holiday and when you come back, you can think about another approach more suited for you with the tarot or maybe to join the reading section.

fantasymoon, yes, I can see your frustration. Maybe stop for a while trying to get the cards to tell the future, and for now build your skills by having them illuminate the present.

By that I mean use them to dig into why things are happening as they are, what past events a present event came from etc. Foretelling the future is tricky and defnitely the hardest way to go for a beginner.

One way to judo-chop those doubts and problems with forecasting what you already know... but it takes a guts... you ready to hear it?

Go read for a complete stranger. You don't have to do it for money if you feel you aren't ready for that level of commitment. But read for someone you *don't* know, not just yourself, or friends and family.

It will scare the bejesus outta you, and yet it can provide the most illuminating of Tarot experiences there are.

And if it makes any difference, I can rarely read for myself. It's one thing I find pretty sucky about the whole Tarot thing, but I have extreme difficulty reading for myself, and often will find another trusted Tarot reader for advice for myself.

Lastly, while in Greece, instead of "studying" the cards, why don't you shift your perception as "playing" with them? Look at a flower, or a color, and then ask your deck, what card would this be? Pull the card and see... just *play* with them, enjoy thier company.

fantasymoon,

So sorry to hear you are feeling stuck, going around in a loop and feeling heavy of mind. I know that feeling and please know that my thoughts are with you.

I can't give any sage advice, as I am a rank beginner. I did think to mention about asking a different and/or more specific or pointed question to the cards, but I feel pretty sure that you know all about how to ask questions for a reading.

So, maybe this will cheer you up some? I have found your posts in the scrying for beginners thread in the divination forum to be of immense help to me. I can't thank you enough! They touched my heart and spirit, and I had quite an experience recently trying the eyelid scrying technique. All thanks to you, fantasymoon! I will post about it at some point, but right now I am still processing it.

While it is true that I don't know you, it seems to me that you are a natural at all this sort of stuff and that if you feel stuck and heavy of mind, it is probably equal to my own inspired moments. But however that may be, trust that this will pass and things will flow again. You will figure this out and get beyond it.

And besides, from a purely selfish angle, you simply HAVE TO, because I need you to continue to lend you knowledge and inspiration to the scrying for beginners thread!

Seriously, though, I'm really sorry that you are having a tough time of it! I hope it has already passed even as I post this.

Take care fantasymoon and have a GREAT trip!

Crowqueen said:

Hejsan, Fantasymoon.

A maxim I would go by is the British medium/healer/psychic Betty Shine's "truism" that "a good clairvoyant can get a reading from a piece of string". Thus you should always trust your gut feeling.

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I would agree with this wholeheartedly!!

Go off and have a good trip....

Interesting you pulled two "two's." One a "thinking" card and one a "feeling" card you might say...no wonder you got all tangled up...do you decide with your thoughts or with your feelings???

Go with your gut, as Crowqueen has suggested and when you come home, practice more with the cards as a tool for guidance ....our fate isn't written in stone...we have choice and free will.....journal the cards, and practice rather than trying to find a "hard" and "fast" prediction using Tarot or stones.

Good that you posted your ideas and feelings here. This is what AT is all about!! ....and always some wonderful input so you can take what resonates with what you need at the present time....

terri

to all of you

Crowqueen, catlin, Marion, cheekyinchworm, tmgrl2.. you all have giving me some wounderful ideas and points of view.
I like this playing with the cards.. start looking at them instead of studying them.
This is absolutley what I am going to do this comming month. Just band and getting closer to the cards. Throw away all of this that I allways have felt on like a burden. I have allways been a person of feelings, intuition.. the moment kind of girl. Not numbers and facts. Remembering real hard fact allways makes me feel a bit less. And that is not what I need.
(Well non of us need to feel less.)

So during my holliday I absolutley will just look at the cards, in detail. Maybe lay a card or so for just that flower and so on.. Exellent advice!
Yes, I have a lot to think about and so this comming time. Wich I now know how to approach. So I will return in about a month letting you all know the results.
I have allways decide with my feelings and not with my thoughts, so way start now.. As you asked tmgrl2..

Thank you all.. this really helped me. And it also helped to hear your uppdate cheekyinchworm. And it is good that you have something to work on/at. Process. I have that thread on watch and will not put it away.

You will hear from me again. And again, thank you.

tmgrl2 said:

....our fate isn't written in stone...we have choice and free will.....
terri

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Ah, the biggest lie in psychic studies...if this was true, there would be no possibility of predicting the future. Watch "12 Monkeys" if you don't believe me - that is not just a cracking great movie, but based on sound philosophical principles which I learned at university - ironically on a course I never meant to do but the other one just happened to clash with my compulsory modules in my first year.

However, like most environmental propaganda, it is a convenient lie, since it stops people from being lazy and just sitting at home waiting for the future to happen.

But that is a whole other thread waiting to happen.

tmgrl2 said:

....our fate isn't written in stone...we have choice and free will.....

Click to expand...

Crowqueen said:

Ah, the biggest lie in psychic studies...if this was true, there would be no possibility of predicting the future. Watch "12 Monkeys" …based on sound philosophical principles which I learned at university …

However, like most environmental propaganda, it is a convenient lie…

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“12 Monkeys” as proof that there is no self-determination?

Environmental propaganda?

How about this…Fate – or ‘set in stone’, only works – if time is linear.

…modern physics disputes that…

Did they teach nothing at the university?