Reading for others without consent

Niti

Hi all,

I know that, morally, a lot of tarot readers prefer not to read for people without their consent - particularly in cases where a person is asking the reader about a third party. It is not our place to tell one person information about another who is not present. I fully understand that.

However, I had two ideas today and I wondered where they would be placed on the morality compass when it comes to readings.

My first idea was about the reading exchange here on AT. I thought, if a person wanted to practice reading for others without the added pressure of having someone rely on their answers...they could just leach of other peoples' threads. Questions, readings, and feedback are often posted publicly on the boards, so a person could privately take a query, read for it, and then compare their results to those of the designated reader *and* the feedback posted by the querent. They would take no active part in the reading, but it could prove valuable as a learning experience because of the multiple layers of feedback/comparison.

I was intrigued by the idea....but then I wondered whether it would be immoral to read for a querent who is not asking *you* for advice. In this case, the querent is obviously okay with having his/her cards read about the matter, but is it wrong if they are not asking you? Is it wrong, as well, to read through the things they chose to divulge to their designated reader? A bit like standing at the door eavesdropping for the purpose of "learning", no?


A similar type of situation came to mind when I was browsing some old threads. I found a thread in which Umbrae suggested to someone that they practice a certain type of reading (I believe it was a time-related thread) by doing readings for friends. He suggested that this person read about situations of friends, enclose the readings into envelopes without telling anyone the results, and open them up months later to find out how accurate they were. I would assume, in cases like this, that the reader would not inform his subjects of the readings - after all, if he did, the they would surely want to know the results and foil the plan! So then...is it moral to read the cards for said freinds without their consent...as long as it is purely for educational purposes and not to be repeated to others? Or is it still an unacceptable invasion of another's privacy?


I guess what this all boils down to is....is it ever okay to read for others without their consent? If so, under what circumstances? Where do the moral lines blur? Please discuss.
 

celticnoodle

yes, i agree that reading for others w/o their consent is not very moral, but I must admit, I do it on occasion myself. I have two sisters who have nothing to do with the family, (in my opinion as a result of their significant others, who are both very very controlling), and because I am concerned with their well being, I do readings on occasion to see how they are doing. How life is treating them.

It's funny, because the one sister still lives near other family members and friends, (an area where we were raised), so alot of information tends to get back to us on how that sister is doing, and it matches up with what I've read about 95% of the time, if not more. The other sister.........well, she doesn't live close by and though we do get information on occasion through the grapevine about her, it's maybe once a year that this happens. I have never really been able to tell if the readings I do on her are anywhere near the same accuracy as with my older sister, but I'm pretty sure they will be.

So, my opinion here on reading for others w/o their consent, may not be ethical, but at times it is necessary. if for nothing more then allowing us to know what may possibly be going on in their lives.
 

UrbanFool

It seems like in every tarot or astrology book, they've got charts on someone famous. I don't understand why they don't think that's an invasion of someone's privacy. I think, celticnoodle, that that type of reading for your sisters is one thing. It's another to use it for "gossip".

"Is my spouse cheating on me?" would be another one that would fall into gray area.
 

Niti

UrbanFool said:
It seems like in every tarot or astrology book, they've got charts on someone famous. I don't understand why they don't think that's an invasion of someone's privacy. I think, celticnoodle, that that type of reading for your sisters is one thing. It's another to use it for "gossip".
But...but...celebrities aren't humans like us! They don't need privacy! :eek: :rolleyes:

Honestly, though, I don't get it either. Half of what we hear about celebrity lives is fabricated bullcrap made up by sensationalist quasi-journalists. Sometimes they get it right because, well, you're bound to find out some correct information when you are *stalking* someone day and night...but still. I hardly see how you can trust that your readings are/aren't right, purely by celebrity magazines. Highly flawed way of practicing imho.
 

Seafra

If you aren't going to use the information you get to do them any harm then I see no harm.
 

Pook

I think that tarot readers should be afforded the same luxury as say doctor/patient privacy, or lawyer/client priveledge, and if thats the case, since there is no reason, why a doctor cant call up and order a patients latest medical chart to see how they're doing, or a lawyer can't check the court records to see that his client is sticking with his court orders.

The gray area comes in when you seek to use the information you learn to affect the person in question.

I might be pretty upset if someone said to me "Well, I did a reading on you, and I tihnk you should do this...."

But that's just me.....
 

Niti

Pook said:
I might be pretty upset if someone said to me "Well, I did a reading on you, and I tihnk you should do this...."
What if, instead, the person told you after the fact?

You are sitting down to tea one day with your friend, telling him your latest relationship/career endeavors...and a slightly knowing look comes in his eyes, with a smug sort of smile.

"What?" you say, wondering what could possibly cause that reaction.

"Oh...well, uhh...I did this tarot reading about [insert said situation here] a couple of months ago, and...it all makes sense now! I was right!"

He's not telling you what to do. He never tried to influence your actions. He never would have even told you, but you asked. How would you feel about it?
 

willowfox

The general rule is; do whatever you want as long as it does not harm anyone.
 

Keigh

I try not to do it. It's hard. Here's how I handle it when querents ask about their spouse, significant other, or ex...I try to refocus the question - for example:
What does Querent need to know about X's feelings for her. - that's one way to refocus the question. I try to bring it back to being "about the querent" - especially since that's the person whose energy I feel I am accessing.

As for the threads on AT - this is a public forum - reading through the posts is a learning exercise and should be encouraged. If something is too private, readings and feedback often get PM'd and anyone who feels their posted reading is too personal can ask to have it removed. I wouldn't worry about that. If you're planning to do readings on other people's posts and then compare your answers (all in private) to the feedback, etc. that's seems okay, though I'd suggest getting out there and taking some real risks. Do real readings for real feedback...you'll find you learn much better that way! If you're looking in the "personal readings section" I think that those situations are more "personal" and I'd suggest you make the decision on your own whether to read for it or not. I don't think I'd do it, unless I was prepared to post my reading or my thoughts on their interpretations...but that's just my opinion. Since this section is also a members only area, some level of discretion/privacy is implied - albeit only a bit.

The circles, I think, are fair game. Those are intended to be educational/developmental and open to all eyes for reading.

I'm not sure if I answered your questions or not....or if I've been clear (or just clear as mud :D). Thanks for listening.

Keigh
 

Niti

Keigh said:
I'm not sure if I answered your questions or not....or if I've been clear (or just clear as mud :D). Thanks for listening.
Like many of my threads as of late, it's not so much about me. I'm asking because it interests me to hear peoples' takes on the matter.

As for the behind-the-scenes readings on the Reading Exchange...I haven't actually done this yet. The idea came to me accidentally when I discovered that someone had asked the same question to me and another reader and I found myself comparing notes.

Personally, I would never practice on anyone in the Personal Readings section. I would see that as an invasion of privacy. They are asking you to help them see the message in their cards, not asking to be read for anew.

As for your bit about how I should "get out there" and practice...yes, I am aware ad nauseaum that live readings are the best way to practice. It is repeated time and again on these forums. However, I don't feel comfortable in a university environment full of impressionable young girls and diehard skeptics, to run around pulling out my freak flag and reading about peoples' messed up relationships all day long. It's annoying and I'm not quite sure that I'm skilled enough to convince the skeptics, nor secure enough to deal with their endless mocking later on. Most of my friends that I would otherwise read for are living on another continent so *shrug*...online practice will have to do.