Help an introvert!

My quandary: I really would enjoy giving more folks a reading, but I find it extremely difficult to translate what I see in a spread into English (or any other language for that matter)! The vast majority of my readings are done for myself, and the few times I've done readings for others things have just turned out kind of awkward. To further complicate matters, I always seem to have a rather difficult time "seeing the story" or the complete picture in a spread when it comes to other people. For myself, I have the benefit of my memories and experiences to piece things together in a spread about me. But for others, I have to go only on the knowledge I can obtain from them regarding the situation and the question being asked.

Normally my verbal communication is very good, and I believe myself to be an articulate speaker. No one has complained thus far at least hehe! But everything seems to fall apart when it comes to readings!

Anyone else have this difficulty when doing spreads for others? More importantly, do they have any tips on overcoming these problems? Thanks much!

Spreads and Questions

Tango said:

Normally my verbal communication is very good, and I believe myself to be an articulate speaker. No one has complained thus far at least hehe! But everything seems to fall apart when it comes to readings!

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Well, these things do take practice and the more you do, the better you will get.

That said, I've two suggestions:
1) Try different spreads. It may not be your trouble is not with the story but the spread. For example, are you using only the CC? That a big, complicated spread where the first seven cards all interrelate--that tougher than, say, a horseshoe spread where each card can be read separate from the others. In reading for others, you should have two or three spreads that you can choose from depending on the question. A spread for love questions, a spread for work/career questions, a general spread; all should be short ones, no more than five or seven cards.

Save the Celtic Cross and other big spreads for long, important readings where you have time to really spend with your reader. Short, focused spreads put less pressure on you; there are less cards to put together, and it keeps the reading on the question.

2) Don't try to get the "story" all at once. Instead, start with individual cards that stand out...and ask the querent some questions so you can warm up to them. Sometimes, the querent doesn't even realize what they're asking for. They'll say, "How's my love life?" when what they really want to know is whether they should quit their job.

The cards will focus on the REAL issue. And you won't know that unless you point to cards that stand out and ask some questions. So you'll say, "The hanged man here in the present position is the only major in this spread. That makes it really important. Do you feel like you're hanging, suspended?" and they'll say, "Well, not in love, but at work, yeah...." And suddenly that 8/Pents in the past position makes a lot of sense, them working so hard and now feeling stuck, like they're not moving up. And the 6/Swords in the future position--moving on, will come clear too...

Don't be afraid to ask questions, to tell them what individual cards are about and find out how that relates to them. When one thing falls into place, usually it all falls into place.

Good advice, thanks!

I had been using rather complicated spreads.

Thirteen's advice is very sound... heed it well, *s*

May I ask... how long have you been reading tarot, either for yourself and/or for others???

Reading tarot is an 'art'... and, as far as I know, there is only one remedy to get THAT good, and that's to practice, practice, practice...

The 'Reading Exchange' here might be of some great help to you... You can take your time with the reading, mull things over, write it out, and get feedback from those you read for... Again, this will afford you the practice you need to master this art...

I agree 100% that piecing together the story, as you put it, is an art in and of itself when you are reading for strangers. You just have to practice at every possible opportunity. I'm still very much in my learning curve, but I have been amazed by how strangers will say, "Oh- that is exactly true!" about something I say to them. These affirmations will increase your confidence in yourself and your faith in the cards. Once you have complete faith that the cards are always telling you something important and true, then you can "let go" of your fears, inhibitions, and all the things you're unsure about, and take the risk of saying exactly what you see. This may not apply in your case, but I am just speaking from my own experience. I do know exactly what you're talking about, because I started out just reading for myself. After a while I realized that I had gotten very good and skilled at seeing all the connections for myself, but I was lost when I read for anyone else. That is what made me realize that I needed to practice reading for others as much as I had been practicing reading for myself... and it evolves naturally from there. I wish you the best, and I hope this helps a little!

And when you do feel like you're ready, you can join in the reading circles in the exchange forum. The Newbie one always uses simple spreads with heaps of room to move, so to speak, and it's a secure, encouraging environment to learn in. You can set up a dialogue with your partner, tossing ideas back and forth, compare impressions, revise, all that. I love the circles, and I hope to see you there soon!

\m/ Kat

I got the same thing can't seem to focus when reading with a person sitting by me, i hope it will change after a while. Trying to find a group in the nieghberhood where i can do this, a sort of tarot course, that should help to get of.

This weekend a person came to my house and ofcause saw the cards lying in a shelf, Oh do you read cards , in my head it went oh no while i said yes.

She asked to see the cards, when she was looking at them she put them all upright , till i said they had a purpose when lying upsidedown.
Then when i read for her, it was just like pieces of paper lying there, no meanings, i talked about the standard book meaning but it went nowhere...
Frustrating, but it wasn't a calm situation for me really.

Like others said training, maybe for people close to me it will stay hard, dunno.

This may sound like a strange question, but do you sit oposite the person you read for or side by side?

When you read for yourself, the cards are always the right way up (reversals excepted if you use them). If you sit oposite the person it will be the wrong way up for one of you. This may be what is stopping the flow of the reading. I've found that when you're next to the person, you both look at the same card and the images mean something to both of you (even if they don't know it), and help focus the other persons mind as well, making it easier for them to relate to what you're saying. Images will do their work with their minds and make it easier for you to ake the connection. Also, if I'm strugling with a particular card, I tend to pick it up to have a closer look. The person can still see it if they are next to me and often, taking it out singels it out and gets their mind focused as well as mine.

I don't think I explained that very well, but hopefully you know what i mean. I find it very hard to explain. But if I look at a reading upside down, I can't make sense of it at all.

FaireMaiden said:

Thirteen's advice is very sound... heed it well, *s*

May I ask... how long have you been reading tarot, either for yourself and/or for others???

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About four years now

I think I'm definitely going to join the circles and exchanges!

Merenwen said:

I've found that when you're next to the person, you both look at the same card and the images mean something to both of you (even if they don't know it), and help focus the other persons mind as well, making it easier for them to relate to what you're saying.

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A nice and interesting point. I find the same to be true. For me, things flow much better when the reader is sitting next to me rather than across from me. At the very least, we can both enjoy the pictures that way