Phrasing a question well

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 24 Oct 2002, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Riversea	24 Oct 2002
This is something that I know I've been struggling with, and I'd like to hear what others have to say about it. I know a good reading often depends on a good question. How do you go about taking your querant's (or for that matter, your own) "oh-my-gosh-this-thing-happened-and-what-does-it-mean-and-what-should-I-do-and-how-will-it-effect-both-the-price-of-tea-and-my-bf's-final-exams?" question, and get it down to the nitty-gritty, I-can-read-for-this question? (Ok, the above example wasn't an actual question, and would probably need to be broken down into a couple of queries. But you know the type of question I mean, vague and all over-the-board.) I find I have a hard time paring it down to what I (or my querant) actually want to know, and then getting that into the form of a workable question. Does anyone else struggle with this? Does anyone have any hints or tricks in dealing with this? How do you handle it? Thanks in advance! :)

Laurel	24 Oct 2002
Wow, that's a good one Riversea. I'm notorious for asking long statement questions during my Monday tarot sessions with a friend. He's been slowly breaking me of the habit by listening for a while and then saying "So your question is ......." and paraphrasing it in a more precise fashion. I add in, he paraphrases and as soon as we both agree, he starts the reading. Laurel

LadyShallot	24 Oct 2002
I like to complete the phrase "What wisdom do I need for ...." Possible sentence completions: "Today", "in dealing with or understanding my relationship with whoever"," to be bringing healing to xyz problem." When I am reading for others, I like to spend a bit of time talking to them and listening to them talk about whatever the situation is that has brought them to see me. I am usually pretty dialog oriented when giving readings asking the querent what they see in the card, what symbols jump out at them. Initial conversation to the point where we can pinpoint their questions by completing the above phrase leads to a nice dynamic during the reading. I do not usually do predictive readings but focus on dynamics.

kayne	26 Oct 2002
I often don't ask for a question at all... Most of the readings I do are for friends and I do usually ask for a question from people I don't know well. If there is no question or the question is unclear I usually do a Celtic Cross so that many aspects can come through...

divinerguy	26 Oct 2002
I ask about areas of concern. I allow the flow of the reading to determine the response given. By keeping to concepts as compared to fixed questions, it allows you to weave a story with the cards.

catboxer	26 Oct 2002
Riversea: An excellent topic. Arthur Rosengarten in "Tarot and Psychology" says that asking the right question, and articulating it properly, is nine-tenths of the battle.

Mystica	26 Oct 2002
Good advice from everyone! Laurel, I sure could use your friend's help in paraphrasing my questions! This is something I struggle with too. In Joan Bunning's book, "Learning the Tarot" she has some good chapters on forming questions.

Fuzzmello	27 Oct 2002
I find that the question is important because it directs the querant's attention to main point of interest. In other words, asking a question serves to bring the client into the moment, into the present, where their presence will influence how the cards arrange themselves during the cast. If the querant is all over the place mentally, they're probably the same on the gnostic level. The idea is to get centered, somewhat calm, and focus that attention to what it is they really want to find out. Asking the question is a snap after they do that. My role in this is to be as calm and assured of what I'm doing as I can. I find that if I'm centered and open it really helps them. Fuzz

Lee	30 Oct 2002
Just to provide a different perspective, I read somewhere (unfortunately I can't remember where, I think it was a British Tarot newsletter) an article in which the author expressed the opinion that, contrary to the trend nowadays to rephrase the querent's question, that we should simply try to answer whatever question they ask, since, after all, they are paying us (if it's a paying customer) for the reading. She (the author) suggested that perhaps it's a little presumptuous of us to rephrase the client's question, and that doing so may put the client into a less receptive mood. She suggested that we *not* rephrase the question, but instead use concepts from the question to construct the reading, but without saying, "okay, now I'm going to rephrase your question for you into what you should have asked." -- Lee

zander770	30 Oct 2002
most of the time i DO NOT even want to KNOW what a qurent's question is (and, they're almost always "blown away" at the accuracy of my reading)! 770

Jewel	31 Oct 2002
Lee I totally agree with that. It ties in really nicely to what Divinerguy said ... use the concepts. I personally do not do a lot of readings (I am the meditative/bookworm type), but when I do I usually keep it general and let the cards weave the story ... unless I have something specific that has been bugging me for a while. For friends ... I just work with their own questions. Sometimes they share the question with me, other times they don't. I just tell them what I see.

Umbrae	31 Oct 2002
I always ask the sitter to think generally on the subject in question – rather than, “Is this guy right for me?” – I will have them think generally on the their relationship – and take the reading from there. Often, what a person thinks is their issue, is not the issue at all. So if I am concentrating on the question of, “is this guy right” rather than the relationship in general, I miss the point and misread the oracle.

zander770	31 Oct 2002
[quote]Originally posted by Umbrae [b]I always ask the sitter to think generally on the subject in question – rather than, “Is this guy right for me?” exactly! 770

tigerlily	02 Nov 2002
Quote: Originally posted by Lee Just to provide a different perspective, I read somewhere (unfortunately I can't remember where, I think it was a British Tarot newsletter) an article in which the author expressed the opinion that, contrary to the trend nowadays to rephrase the querent's question, that we should simply try to answer whatever question they ask, since, after all, they are paying us (if it's a paying customer) for the reading. She (the author) suggested that perhaps it's a little presumptuous of us to rephrase the client's question, and that doing so may put the client into a less receptive mood. She suggested that we *not* rephrase the question, but instead use concepts from the question to construct the reading, but without saying, "okay, now I'm going to rephrase your question for you into what you should have asked." -- Lee It sure needs some tact to rephrase a question without appearing condescending or controlling, but precision is very important. Quick example: I was doing a "decision reading", laying out cards for both options I had. After my choices of action and their implications were laid out before me, I still couldn't decide which one to choose. So I asked: "How should I decide?" I got the 6 of Coins, telling me, "well, you should carefully weigh your options and then decide for the action that is more useful." Now, that much I had already figured out on my own! What I had intended to ask was, "which option should I prefer?" and when I rephrased the question that way, I got a very precise, clear answer. Tarot trains you to be more precise in your thinking and your choice of words. People who come to a reading without that mental precision will probably ask vague questions and get equally vague answers - and then may decide that the reading wasn't really worth that much money.

MeeWah	02 Nov 2002
I have been interested in the responses because I prefer to not know the concern or the question. Sometimes, too much information can adversely colour a reading. From a reading standpoint, I usually ask that what is needed be given; or what does the person (or I) need to know. I also do as Umbrae & instruct the client to focus or to think generally on the matter but not to tell me of the nature of same. Occasionally, the client has told me the information given was not what was asked, but was still appropriate; related to the concern & offered another view. There is truth that one gets what one asks for, so in dealing with specifics, the wording would be significant. Lee also makes a good point as I have thought about this. In rephrasing someone's question, one can risk imposing one's idea of what "should" be asked. I think using the querent's wording can work depending on the parameters of the matter.

lawguy51	03 Nov 2002
I find that not asking for a question does two things - firstly, it leaves me open and unbiased as I look at the spread. With a question, I am watching every card turn over and immediately trying to relate it back to the question. Secondly, as we all know, people are skeptical of Tarot. Even those who ask for readings. A lot of people feel that, if they give you the question, you can just tailor the answer. It's a lot more fun when there is no question to see the look on a querant's face when you say, 'Is there someone new in your life?'.

The Phrasing a question well thread was originally posted on 24 Oct 2002 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.