Constructing Questions

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 17 Feb 2003, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Major Tom	17 Feb 2003
I refer to this thread: http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1594&highlight=questions I often find that clients come to me for a reading with absolutely no idea about what they want or what they want to achieve. They’ll say, “Can you tell me about my lovelife? Can you tell me if I’ll ever be rich? Can you tell me about my live? :eek: Or even, “Can you tell me when I’m going to die?” :eek: I can answer those questions, but how is that going to help my client? I always tell my clients, “The more specific your question, the more specific your answer”. Thus, I try to spend some time before I even start the reading helping my client formulate a question. So from “Can you tell me about my lovelife?” I ask if they have a relationship, if yes, I ask if there’s a problem, if yes, I recommend they focus on the problem. If there is no existing relationship, I recommend they ask “What can I do to bring a loving relationship into my life? My strong belief is that tarot provides the information you need to produce the outcomes you desire. Focus on what you want. Find out what you need to do to have it. It’s as simple as that. }) Sometimes people don’t know what they want – from their reading or from their lives - as tarot readers we can help with that too. I’d love to hear any thoughts or reflections on assisting clients with question construction.

firemaiden	17 Feb 2003
Interesting, Major T. Can you tell me about my lovelife? :D:D:D I read the other thread, too bad its all already been discussed. Can we do it again? I really have been wanting to ask questions about questions for a while, but have been to scared to ask :P I am beginning to suspect that nine- tenths of the value of the tarot, is in the asking of the questions, in that it is in asking questions and looking for answers that we can grow...

dolphingirl	17 Feb 2003
Hi Everyone Here is a super article on forming a tarot question at this site written by Greyhound at the Tarot for Life MSN Community. http://www.tarotforlife.homestead.com/TarotQArticle.html I find this article to be very well written and has helped me alot DolphinGirl

truthsayer	17 Feb 2003
i prefer not to know a q's question and allow the cards to free associate about the q (via me aka reader). if the cards don't reflect the question, i ask if the cards addressed any other situations in the q's life. if so, i ask if there could be any link b/t my answer and their question in the big picture of the situation. i can also put down some additional cards to clarify the reading-still prefering not to know the question. why do i do this? as a former counselor, i was trained to read body language. i can gain a great deal of info just by observing postures, mannerisms, dress and hair style, voice inflection, etc. if i know the question on top of all the other info, while the reading may be accurate, i feel like i got the info by cheating--not genuine intuition. i don't need tarot to tell me that kind of info. if the q insists on telling me the question, i prefer to wait until after i do a preliminary reading w/o knowing. just my idiosyncrasy. if i helped a q formulate a question, my concern would be that by helping develop a question i'm also learning valuable info that will affect what i say in the reading. this is my way of trying to be more objective in a reading.

Karenwhe	17 Feb 2003
Here is a link with extensive explanation on how to write/ask questions. It is a worth while read for experienced readers and beginners. http://www.learntarot.com/less7.htm I think I have previously given my thoughts on this subjects in a more detailed manner, however here it goes in a shorter version (I hope I will make it shorter :D :D :D ). It is very true that one has to direct the client to helpful questions that will enable the reading itself to add value. I heard once someone say that directing a question is just a way of the reader to find the right question for themselves in a way that s/he can answer.......... I don't have to tell you just HOW MUCH I disagree with this..... It is very, very important to take time with your querents, tarot is a serious thing, even if not for you (the reader), for your querent/s it is. So, yes.... I personally take the time to know my querent as much as time permits. As I don't perform tarot as a vocation (I don't charge basically), I have more freedom to do so as no one is looking at the clock ticking (of course not everyone has such luxury). I do find that I have become an expert at asking relationship questions (even though I have zero experience in relationship problems - as I never had any (I count my blessings every single day on this and thank God). My approach is to find the root of the problem. Sometimes I just ask the querent "what is it that you want in issue x or y?" (this is in extreme cases) because they really, really don't know what they want and they are “beating around the bush”. Then they start talking........... and then the question formulates itself naturally in the process of the conversation. I think you have to be a damn good listener to help the querent ask the right question. You (the reader) also have to know to ask the right guiding questions to get to the bottom of the problem. If you don’t guide the querent it means you are “telling them” (though querents love this, just dish them out solutions and they will be happy) I don’t like this approach as at the end, it is their life not mine and if I dish them out solutions they probably have learnt nothing and no one can guarantee that my solutions are appropriate for them. I have encountered some rare and very extreme cases where I had to tell the querent what to do (one of them was for a woman to leave a very physically violent husband I had to make her pick up the phone and call the help line). But even in this case from there on it was her doing the rest to get away from the situation. I do not think that there is a specific answer or system to this problem, but I believe that listening to the querent and seriously listening his/her problems will enable you to formulate together with the querent the right question. The querent will love you for it a hundred times more as you listened not only read for them, and having someone to listen to problems without judging, these days it is a commodity. But of course do remember that the all above written is only my opinion and what works for me.

Alex	17 Feb 2003
I am one good example of someone who does not know what I want. Sometimes I read for myself trying to find out what I want; but that's not a good way to start either because the cards can't usually tell me what I want_ other than tell me that I don't know what I want. It's always easier to foccus on something specific with some little help from another but how to make it any easier in self-readings I don't know really. Alex. Quote: Originally posted by Major Tom Sometimes people don’t know what they want – from their reading or from their lives - as tarot readers we can help with that too.

Alex	17 Feb 2003
I'm quite sure it was me who said that. But well... shall we not re-engage that conversation here... may be just agree to... disagree. (Sorry, Karen, couldn't help it but make the joke. I just think I was misunderstood.) Alex. Quote: Originally posted by Karenwhe I heard once someone say that directing a question is just a way of the reader to find the right question for themselves in a way that s/he can answer.......... I don't have to tell you just HOW MUCH I disagree with this.....

Karenwhe	17 Feb 2003
Quote: Originally posted by Alex I'm quite sure it was me who said that. But well... shall we not re-engage that conversation here... may be just agree to... disagree. Thank you Alex for coming out of the woodwork and helping me out with my memory problems............ just kidding. I didn't even know it was someone on Aeclectic, I just remembered clearly the comment. Oh, well I ain't going there again either rest assured.

Kiama	18 Feb 2003
One reason I prefer to help the questioner form their question is because sometimes I get confronted with questions such as 'Can I ask about my car?' So yesterday, becaue I neglected to help my questioner forumlate his qustion and conider seriously what he would like to know about, I ended up doing a reading for a beat-up Beatle. Veeeerry difficult and pointless, thouhg the guy found it useful, so I guess that's okay. You could tell he was a typical male though: 'I wanna know about my sex life, (He wasn't even in a relationship at the time!) my car, and my social life. Oh, and Uni.' Kiama

The Constructing Questions thread was originally posted on 17 Feb 2003 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.