to tell or not to tell?

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 08 Mar 2003, and now archived in the Forum Library.

reds97	08 Mar 2003
I have a question on a tarot reading i did for my sister. She asked for a relationship reading and i have done it, will be mailing it to her soon but the question is, since the one i did has advice for him as well, is it proper for me to insist that she include him in the conversation? She is thinking about ending the relationship and the card that i pulled up for him suggests to me that he is more involved than she thinks he is. (she thinks they are at different stages) is this proper for a reader to ask that the other party involved in the reading be apart of it? sandra (ps. i don't read my own relationship because it is not fair that i have a tool to give me insight and he doesn't. I feel like it is not "fighting fair".)

Alissa	08 Mar 2003
This is a sticky one, I can see that. In my experience, I try to keep third parties out of it for the most part. However, there have been just a *few* situations where, like you describe, something directed to a third party comes up in the course of the reading. In most of those situations I knew the third party, and told them a message if I was worried the partner wouldn't. In your case, I think I would've handled it much like you did. Mention the message, and the importance of delivering it to the 3rd party, to the person you are reading. Hopefully they will honor the process, and deliver the message. And, since it came up in their reading, sometimes I feel the cards are trying to give that same information to the querent as well. It may be important to their decision-making process regarding the issue at hand. Other than that, I try to avoid third parties being involved (unless it's a group reading, that's different) as much as possible.

Original Destiny	08 Mar 2003
Mmmm, I guess I would leave it upto the person you are doing a reading for to decide. the third party might not take kindly to having their relationship inspected in a tarot reading. let your siser decide as it is her relationship....

Mojo	08 Mar 2003
It's a Tarot reading, for crying out loud. Which means it is largely the creation of your own mind and nothing more. Treat it as such.

Alex	08 Mar 2003
A relationship isn't a battle, it is a work of two. If you can improve it by reading cards, what is unfair about it? Your friend may feel he can improve your relationship by reading a self-help book on women's behaviour. Is it unfair, once you have not read the book? Alex. << (ps. i don't read my own relationship because it is not fair that i have a tool to give me insight and he doesn't. I feel like it is not "fighting fair".) >>

Kiama	10 Mar 2003
Quote: Originally posted by Mojo It's a Tarot reading, for crying out loud. Which means it is largely the creation of your own mind and nothing more. Treat it as such. Indeed, but what if (A BIG what if there! ;)) there is a reason your mind created that specific interpretation? Your mind has a choice, and an infinite one at that, to create an interpretation... It could create: 'And here I see that your girlfriend is having an affair with your next doorneighbour's uncle', but instead it chose to create something else. Why? Ooooohhh... Tough one! Kiama

Icestorm	11 Mar 2003
Hmmm.... It highly depends on the people of course, and there is this certain amount of "mind your own business", but perhaps you could consider directly contacting the 3rd party and having a confidential talk with him, especially if the cards do suggest keeping the relationship might be more beneficial? Of course, that particular notion could be a bit touchy cos its your sister and her love life we're talking about... but yeh, you never know, you might save the relationship and make everyone happy! :-] (On a sombre note, you could also anger everyone and lose your sister's trust, so only take my advice with a pinch of salt :-] )

reds97	11 Mar 2003
i asked her about it on saturday and i don't kno why i even id the reading... cause she had already made up her mind to end it. *shakes head* so i advised her that it just might not be the right time and to remain friends with him if possible cause the future might give you something else to think about... paths might cross again.

Laurel	11 Mar 2003
I would say a lot depended entirely on your relationship with both parties. It can get messy, sharing insight into someone's personal life when they aren't the querent themselves. I personally would not do it. If I felt like there was advice for my querent's partner/boyfriend, I'd offer said partner/boyfriend a separate reading perhaps. ~LAS

The to tell or not to tell? thread was originally posted on 08 Mar 2003 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.