Skepticism and Tarot

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 14 Apr 2003, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Melissa`	14 Apr 2003
The past couple of weeks I've been approached with a few people I work with to give them a tarot reading. The thing is, they are extremely skeptical about it. They tease me about reading.. about buying new decks. Saying its not real or "oh.. you can read my future.. oooh.. " then laugh. So I proceed to explain to them that tarot is a tool for advice, in many other words of course as is my opinion. In the end this frustrates me in my mind. I don't want to do the readings on one hand because I feel that I have to prove them wrong. I feel as if they just want to challenge me. I have done readings for people like this before, but it left me feeling empty. I proved them wrong but I don't want to read for people just to prove them wrong. So I am curious on how others here have reacted to these situations when posed with it. If you did the readings at all and how you felt afterward. Or am I the only one that is uneasy with it? Please keep in mind that I have only done a handful of readings for others in the past... if these questions seem silly to any of you. Blessings, Amaya

divinerguy	14 Apr 2003
I don't usually ask people if they want readings. I let them see me with cards, and if they're curious, they ask me. Most people, I think, are skeptics. We live in a cynical society, which often distrusts anything that is different. A lack of education or religious fanaticism will often turn a normal person into a severe critic. I'd use caution as to where you and with whom you display your cards. I'm not saying its dangerous, or anything like that. I just find that some people's reactions can be quite strong.

Kiama	14 Apr 2003
Hi Amaya, *Hugs* First of all I give you big hugs, because your workmates are being very unfair to you. They are being very rude, and I'm a very polite English person, or so I've been told, so to me, they are out of line. They are making fun of you, and that is something I find deplorable. Maybe they don't realise that they are out of line, after all, to them it is only a laugh, as is Tarot, but if they did that to me I would be very hurt and quite annoyed. I would tell them that to me what they were saying was offensive, and I would like them to stop. They have no right to ridicule you and make you feel less than who you are. I would also be very wary of doing a reading for a person who only wanted it to 'prove me wrong' and 'test me'. Mainly because I would end up being so worried about it, and I would be focussing too much on proving them wrong, that I wouldn't be reading the cards as well as I normally do, thus causing a self-fulfilling prophecy. Usually they are more closed to the reading aswell, and won't necessarily take anything you say in the reading as true. As a psychic in a magazine said once: 'If you are judged to have performed badly everyone says 'see, its all a load of rubbish.' If you perform extraordinarily well you hear, 'it must be a fix! No one could know all that!' A case of damned if you do and damned if you don't.' (Quoting DeAna's article 'Going Public: A psychic comes out of the closet' from Witchcraft and Wicca magazine.) Sorry for being such a downer on this one, but my experiences with 'sceptical readings' have bene very bad. Kiama

Melissa`	14 Apr 2003
divinerguy, Oh. I didn't mean to sound like I asked if I could give them a reading.. They came to me and asked me to give them one.. :( sorry if it sounded the other way around.. Amaya

divinerguy	14 Apr 2003
I agree with Kiama on this. I won't do a reading for a skeptic. Here's a suggestion - if you have concerns about whether you should do a reading in that situation, do a quickie draw to see if your concern is a valid one.

Butterfly	14 Apr 2003
In my experience it can sometimes be a bit of an act too you know "Oh, I'm supposed to be intelligent and rational, better act like I don't believe it", but inside they are just dying for a reading. It helps to work out if they feel they should be a sceptic, opposed to actually being one.

Athara	14 Apr 2003
Quote: Originally posted by Butterfly In my experience it can sometimes be a bit of an act too you know "Oh, I'm supposed to be intelligent and rational, better act like I don't believe it", but inside they are just dying for a reading. It helps to work out if they feel they should be a sceptic, opposed to actually being one. Yep. In those cases they just behave that way to mask their insecurity. Maybe they're a little bit scared, or simply ashamed. But most of them are dying to have their cards read. But don't read under pressure, that's when the self-forfilling-prophecy sneaks in. Simply talk to them about it, explain it, and if they still want to play the sceptic, turn them down. Don't feel obligated to read for them. It's your call. And never let them make you feel uncomfortable! They're not worth it... Good luck! Athara

Umbrae	14 Apr 2003
During my recent gig at the BMS expo – I know a few of those I read for were skeptics – I just don’t care. But I have learned over the 30 year tarot passion, that I don’t flaunt it at every opportunity. I have friends that don’t know that’s what I do…I don’t advertise within my circle of friends… My wife went to a ball game last week with some friends…she mentioned to them I was doing this weekend reading gig. And like Al (the husband) is a fishing buddy (and when we both drank…). He’s a big bear of a man, a cynic. He looked at my wife and said he’d like to have me read for him sometime…and not in the voice of a skeptic… But he knows me as a person…and knows that if I read… But I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut…I’ve also leaned to love reading for skeptics – it’s not about proving – it’s about reading…which is…to be of service.

magpie9	14 Apr 2003
I used to think, years ago, that it was important to prove that skeptics diddn't scare me any. And it really was hard to read for someone if they were 'closed' against it. So it was usually a rotten experience for me. But I had to deal with it, because I was working a lot of Parties in those days, and it made me feel kinda obligated.... So Then I went through a period where if the skeptic was allowing himself to be pushed by his friends into having a reading, I would suggest that he should probably not have one. The reaction, predicably, was often that they would decide to do it. At that point, I kind of felt that it was the skeptic's problem. Before I read for him, I would cut a card and put it face up on the table between us. It was usually telling commentary ON the skeptic, clear for him to see. And the skeptic would, almost always, either relax into a reading or get up and go away. Either was fine by me. Still is, actually. :D

Melissa`	14 Apr 2003
Thanks for the comments and insights, everyone. I think I might just steer clear of this bunch for a while until I am more comfortable and able to let the bs roll off my shoulders. And thanks for the hugs Kiama *hugs* :) Blessings, Amaya

KelarSkye	15 Apr 2003
Amaya, I have some friends who nicely ask me. They may be skeptics, but they still want to see what it does and how it works. I have run into a few people who just make fun of me and brazenly ask for me to draw cards. I will draw a few single cards, tell them what they mean, tell them I can't do a reading for them because of X, Y or Z, but I try to show them that I don't make it up, I really do know the meanings of the cards. I typically find that the people who make fun are typically less educated or less likely to attempt to learn new things once they have left school. I mean to me, even if I didn't believe, I would be impressed that someone has all this knowledge, whether I thought it viable or not, it is still knowledge. That would impress me on a general basis and I know that this is what impresses friends and coworkers of mine who don't beleive but respect me for my beliefs. Advice, showcase your knowledge, refuse to read. :-)

Richard	15 Apr 2003
I'll give a reading to anyone who asks me for one. I've never had a problem with skeptics, except once when I was doing a reading at a cafe, and some jerk kept hovering over the table, chuckling nastily. I finally told him to go away, which, thankfully, he did. generally, during readings, I try to de-mystify it, describing each card as a certain psychological state rather than written-in-stone truth. Some people tend to be disappointed by that, expecting unexpected wealth and fair-haired significant others, but at least they end up with a more realistic view of what the cards can and can't do.

Mojo	15 Apr 2003
The more skeptical they are, the more I enjoy taking their money.

Mimers	15 Apr 2003
Quote: Originally posted by Mojo The more skeptical they are, the more I enjoy taking their money. Go Go Mojo! :) Perhaps to some it would seem unethical, but I have a little of the devil in me and I say go for it and make sure you tell them it cost 50 bucks. Mimi

Umbrae	15 Apr 2003
once again...I gotta agree with Mojo on this one.

azuremariposa	15 Apr 2003
yeah, i gotta agree w/Mojo too! :D that's just too funny...but so true!! many blessings! ~azure

Diana	16 Apr 2003
Skepticism can be a very healthy thing. I understand people who are like this. If they are asking for a reading, but feel skeptical, it shows that they are open to new ideas but that they reserve their opinion until they have explored this new avenue. New ideas should never be gobbled up without serious contemplation and experiment, nor without deciding whether this new "method" of exploration suits us. Tarot is not suitable for all people. Some people are more suited for other methods of self-discovery.

anjocoxo	16 Apr 2003
I have found several skeptics throughout the years, and I've discovered I simply hate to read for those kind of people. If you don't wanna know what the cards say, if you are here just to make fun of me, and you'll make jokes with whatever I say (whether it's true or not) then piss off!!!!! I have more important things to do than to listen to silly little people's opinions, especially if they poking with what I believe. I know I'm very radical with my views, but it's beyond my reach, it's an impulsive thing that I have Anjo PS- I used to do readings for my boyfriend even though he is a bit skeptical and doesn't believe that much. But one day I was with another girl who asked me how did tarot worked, and I gave her the usual speach "it's an inner tool, it shows you your personality, bla, bla, bla" and then he interrupted me and said "jesus, you always say exactly the same things over and over again!" the girl just looked at me with a strange look on her face.... I was so furious... I never read cards for my boyfriend again.

Diana	16 Apr 2003
Being skeptical and scoffing at people is not the same thing. Skeptical often shows that one has an analytical mind. Scoffing often is a sign of a feeling of superiority which indeed is off-putting for those that they scoff at. Before I started studying Tarot, I too was skeptical. Before I started learning about Bach Flowers, I was too. Now I have decided to further my interest in on-hands healing, although about ten years back or so, I was skeptical too. When I saw not only that all these things work, but understand HOW they work, then I embraced all these things whole-heartedly.

Major Tom	16 Apr 2003
Last year I went to a party with my cards and gave a number of readings to the party-goers. It was all good fun and everyone who had a reading was amazed at the accuracy, especially as I had only just met them. There was one man at the party who said to me, "I'll bet you can't tell me anything with those cards." I just smiled and said, "You're absolutely right. Ever hear of self-fulfilling prophecy?" :laugh:

Trogon	16 Apr 2003
My personal feeling is... if someone asks me for a reading, even though they say they're a skeptic... they'll get a reading. This is what I want to do with the Tarot... do readings for people. However, as several others mentioned, if they're just there to make fun of me, my beliefs or my client they can take a long walk off a short pier. One thing I've learned over the years is that it really doesn't matter to me what the majority of people think of me. I am me and not only can I not change that, I will not change it just to try and please someone else. Or, as Popeye would say; "I yam what I yam and thats all that I yam!" Interestingly enough... I've done some very intense readings for "skeptics". They've come to me wondering what Tarot was about, probably expecting to get something along the lines of the "tall, dark stranger" ilk, then been bushwhacked by insights into some deep feelings.

Alissa	16 Apr 2003
I've rarely read Tarot in public settings, but I have often read palms and encountered the kind of skepticism and disbelief you're describing. One woman walked up to me and said, "Oh so you read palms..." Sitting at my booth, I smiled and nodded. She looked at me down her nose and said, "I don't know if you could read me. I'm pretty complicated." Her tone was condescending, but her body language betrayed her interest despite herself. In response, I shrugged and said, "It's up to you." Inwardly, I felt challenged by her demeanor and words, but I stalwartly refused to be bullied or let her intimidate me. In the end, she sat down and I rocked her socks off. After that, she went around to the rest of the convention go-ers and spread the word that the palm reader was "freaking amazing" and I had a line of people almost all day. I don't care what THEY believe. The point is *I* believe in what I do. And even if I had been off and given a less-than-accurate reading, I still wouldn't have cared. I read for myself, because I believe reading can help people. But, they have to be willing to help themselves, and accept the truth if it comes back to them (even if it's from the mouth of a psychic they distrust). You can lead the horse to water...

Melissa`	16 Apr 2003
wow.. I had no I idea when I postedmy problem that so many of you would reply. Thank you so much. A ton of light was shed on this situation with all of you guys different perspectives. I smiled, I laughed, and nodded my head when reading them all. I will take into account all of your words next time I get teased or what not. Thank you so much.. Blessings, Amaya

Kiama	17 Apr 2003
I feel the need to post aother reply here to clarify what I said originally. I agree with Diana that scoffing and scepticism are two different things. My first post was a 'I hate it when people make fun of it' post. I actually see scepticism as very good. I am a sceptic myself with many things, and will often be the one to cause trouble in religious discussions by giving the most un-mystical side of the argument. (People talk about having mystical experiences, and whist I personally KNOW what mystical experiences can be like from personal experience, it doesn't hurt for somebody to play the sceptic and give the person another side of the story... It helps them learn, helps them confront criticism, and thereby grow.) I have done many readings for sceptics, but only if they are quite serious about it. I hate doing readings where the only reason the person wants a reading is because they want to proove that Tarot is rubbish. Last night however, my scpetical housemate came to me and said that he had a tough decision to make, and whilst he wasn't sure he believed in 'all that stuff', he'd greatly value any input a reading coudl give him. Often once I explain that the Tarot doesn't just tell the future and that it also acts as a way of opening up the querent's mind to exploring the situation properly, sceptics understand. Kiama

The Skepticism and Tarot thread was originally posted on 14 Apr 2003 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.