Uhhh... a little help here plz?

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 15 Oct 2003, and now archived in the Forum Library.

ShorTerM	15 Oct 2003
Heya, been a while since I popped my head in here, but anywho, I think my sister did something really stupid... Well either that or I just attached myself to much... OK, well anyways, My sister was out in BC during the summer, and she got involved with some people in the drug scene... I mean, she has been smokin pot for years now, but she started to get into way harder stuff like coke and crystal meth, and whatnot... Anyways these drugs really messed with her mind and she is now in a psychiatric ward in a hospital. Now last year for Christmas I gave her the Osho Zen tarot deck and she absolutely loved it. Also she took these cards out to BC with her and in the mental state she was in, she decided that there were certain cards which she did not like and certain cards which she didn't like parts of (ie, she cut the bottom half of the stress card off, where the balloon is about to get pierced by a needle, and she wripped the face off of the miser) and then after that she gave them away to somebody... I don't really mind her giving them away too much, but I'm just thinking what is the point? Is it even still a tarot deck once you start removing cards from the deck?? I fail to see how any good could come of doing such things, I mean the tarot itself isn't out to get anyone, it is just there to help clarify certain things... So by removing cards that you don't like is that not like turning away from your fears and running from your past... Well I guess to get down to the help I was seeking, I was wondering what your impressions of this are... ie. Is there any signifigance to her tearing the face off of the miser? Could it be that she feels that the miser represents her, and she is afraid to face that fact so she has chosen to remove the face of the card??? I really wish I had taken the deck when she offered to give it to me so that I could create a comprehensive list of the changes she made to the deck, but anyways, any opinions that you feel like sharing with me would be great... thanks -ShorTerM

galadrial	15 Oct 2003
Hi ShorTerm, I've never done drugs nor studied psychology, but I am prone to occasional deep depressions, and I do know that when in that state I have a much lower tolerance for negative stimuli. Song lyrics, images, etc. that I might not even notice otherwise can bother me a great deal. I've never cut up a tarot deck, but I once ripped a tape (that wasn't mine) out of an 8 track player to stop a song from playing, and when I was an acned teen I once flicked my fingernail over the face of a model in a magazine ad until it was gone. Of much less significance than what about the lyrics or image bothered me was the underlying depression that caused me to react to them with uncharacteristic force. Hope that helps, and welcome back to the forum.

skytwig	15 Oct 2003
Sounds like the cards somehow represent a part of your feelings in this..... experiencing a loved one's addiction is very painful and very frightening. So glad she is in a hospital... she now has a chance to get sober and achieve a new life. Sounds like she was probably influenced by her addiction when she harmed the cards... people do unbelievable stuff under the influence. But, addiction is a disease, and with help, she can recognize that she has it and make the choices she needs to make to enable her disease to go into a remissive state. You may get some relief for yourself in a 12 Step program called Alanon which is for the families of addicts/alcoholics. Also, the books by Melody Beattie are very supportive for those who deal with the effects of addiction in others. Sending prayers for you and your sister. Namaste. :)

Dark_angel	16 Oct 2003
My flatmate is a drug addict, and refuses to recognise her problem. Like your sister, she started smoking pot (although plenty of other people I know have smoked it and not done anything else) and progressed to harder stuff, and now spends her life either wasted or trying to get stuff. Her degree has gone, her job has gone, her life's a mess, but she refuses to see it. She has often asked me to read for her, and each time, the cards show a very clear message - you're messing your life up, STOP TAKING DRUGS! - but that isn't the message she wants, she isn't ready to hear that, so she refuses to listen. I have put up with a lot of criticism about my readings from her because she wants to hear that she's doing great and everything will be fine, but I can't tell her that. The last time I read for her, the outcome card was the Five of Pentacles, which I took to signify the slippery slope she's on to destitution. I think your sister's customisation of her deck is similar to my flatmate's refusal to see the cards as they are; the negativity of the present situation is too much, and she doesn't want to change the situation, so she removes the evidence of the negativity. My flatmate has done some pretty extreme things as a result of her blinkered vision. I think that your sister saw, through the tarot cards, something about herself which she did not like or want to see, so she removed it from the cards so she couldn't see it anymore. Perhaps it was a moment when she saw how selfish she'd been and how much she'd hurt the people she loved and who loved her, all in pursuit of a high. It could be a sign that she's recognising her addiction, and is starting out on the road to recovery, even though it is a very negative act.

The Uhhh... a little help here plz? thread was originally posted on 15 Oct 2003 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.