Bad vibes on my new cards?

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 10 Mar 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.

brandi124	10 Mar 2004
Okay, I'm pretty new to the world of tarot but I've just had a weird experience and wanted to see if you all could offer some words of wisdom here. As I said before in another post whenever I do readings on myself I get very negative readings even when I feel great. On that particular point I'm open to the notion that I probably look a little more at the negative aspects than the positive aspects. But then last night my husband decided he was going to use my cards to do a reading on me! Well I just kind of sat back and didn't say anything because I didn't want to seem like a bad sport, like "I'm the tarot reader in the family", etc. Actually I was QUITE annoyed and felt like he was trying to encroach on my territory which I am embarassed to admit. So anyway, he did this reading on me and one card in particular that came up was amusing-- amongst the key words it said that I was suffering from "ego-driven" competition and something along the lines of annoyance in my personal relationships. (I promise I'm getting to a question) I know that lots here feel there are no "hard and fast" rules when it comes to tarot-- but I'll settle for tried and true experience and/or suggestions. I only got these new cards on Saturday-- do you think it's possible I started reading with them too fast? Was it a mistake to let my husband read with them? Should I avoid reading on myself? Any ideas on how to better "bond" with my cards? Again, I know there are no black and white answers to these questions but I'd really appreciate opinions and feedback to give me food for thought. Thanks, Brandi

HudsonGray	10 Mar 2004
I think everyone goes through the 'doom and gloom' stage with their decks at first. It takes a while for that to go away sometimes, even. If you find that you can't read for yourself, just try reading for others, usually that part works just fine. I wouldn't worry about the set of instructions on each card, not all the meanings (or even any of the meanings) will apply, so look at it a little broader range than what the LWB says. It's just there to start you out--when the image on the card suggests something else to you, go with that. You bond by getting to know the images very well. Some say to sleep with the deck under your pillow, but beware of bent cards from that. They're a tool. The more you know the tool, the better it is to work with.

mysticalowl	10 Mar 2004
You could always clense your deck if you feel that it has bad vibes. You can find many ways to reset a deck on the forum. I am not sure I agree that the deck has bad vibes though. Maybe you are just sending energy that is not as positive at the moment. If you can figure out what is at the root of these readings..you could probably fix it. Hope this helps. mysticalowl

MeeWah	10 Mar 2004
Since this thread is more appropriate for the Talking Tarot Forum, it will be moved there.

Centaur	10 Mar 2004
Hi Brandi124, Out of interest, which deck did you purchase? Quote: Originally posted by brandi124 I only got these new cards on Saturday-- do you think it's possible I started reading with them too fast? No. I think that you are only doing what most of us would do if we got a new tarot deck... use it! ;) Quote: Originally posted by brandi124 Was it a mistake to let my husband read with them? No. I don't think that it really matters who reads with them. Quote: Originally posted by brandi124 Should I avoid reading on myself?? Noooooo. That is one of the best things about reading tarot I think... being able to read for yourself and have insight into your own life. Quote: Originally posted by brandi124 Any ideas on how to better "bond" with my cards? As Hudson-Gray said, perhaps you could sleep with them under your pillow. Or even just looking at them: exploring the imagery and making your own connections and associations with the artwork. Yes, the books provide us with interpretations, but I think it is also important to make your own connections and form a link with your deck in that way. As has been suggested, perhaps you could cleanse your cards. There are numerous ways to do this. Some I have heard of include:- * Visualising negative energy dissappearing as you shuffle the cards. * Putting your cards back in order. * Keeping some citrine with your deck. This is a cleansing crystal. * Bathing your deck in moonlight. I have had some similar experiences with some of my decks, and I always find that a good cleansing does the world of good. C

brandi124	10 Mar 2004
Thank you for the feedback. It's a Goddess Tarot deck I'm using-- I'm a little uncomfortable with it because I got to know the tarot initially through a Universal Waite deck with the traditional cards and this one as many probably know has a lot of alternate cards (but essentially very similar) and features a goddess on each of the major arcana cards which is new territory for me. That said I do think bonding with the cards both "spiritually" and by studying them will be necessary before I'm totally comfortable. I'm also glad to know that my husband reading with my cards may have hurt my pride but not my deck. :) And, mysticalowl, I think you are right on point when you say that there are probably some things that I need to work out-- I get frustrated sometimes too because I feel like in my readings they give me a snapshot of my problems but I can't seem to get a feel for finding solutions, kwim?

Pagan X	10 Mar 2004
You might want to give your husband his own deck. It would be encouraging for him, and it sounds like you are a jealous Tarotist when it comes to your decks! I hadn't thought about it before, but I can't think of anybody ever using one of my decks to read. Sure, the readee has to shuffle the deck, but I'm the only reader in my cards' lives for thirty years. Sometimes we just need to have our own territory in which to safely psychically expand.

miss_apples	10 Mar 2004
Tell your husband to get his own deck :p I dont think its the cards as it is the way you are viewing the inturpretations. I try to tell myself that no inturpretation is positive or negative, and every negative inturpretation can be turned into a positive and vise versa depending on the actions the querent takes after the reading. Its all in how you are wording the inturpretations that makes it seem bad. At least thats my opinion.

TemperanceAngel	10 Mar 2004
Hi brandi, Welcome to AT :D I would never let anyone (not even my husband) touch a new deck of mine for at least 2 - 4 weeks, I like my energy to enter the cards first.... It's disrespectful to treat peoples card with no respect. What was your husband reading from, a book? If it's the one that came with the deck then throw it out, well I would. Can't stand those little books that come with cards... Keep your deck in some silk or bag or wooden box and look after them, make them your own for your own private space, not for someone to charge in and touch or read them. Most of all, enjoy your journey ;) XTAX

Ilithiya	11 Mar 2004
Quote: Originally posted by TemperanceAngel It's disrespectful to treat peoples card with no respect. What was your husband reading from, a book? If it's the one that came with the deck then throw it out , well I would. Can't stand those little books that come with cards... Keep your deck in some silk or bag or wooden box and look after them, make them your own for your own private space, not for someone to charge in and touch or read them. Most of all, enjoy your journey ;) XTAX I didn't see any mention of disrespect as such in Brandi's post... perhaps what her husband did was in a sincere interest of helping by offering a comparison? If someone in my family decided to pick up doing henna art, I'd feel the exact same way, as if someone were encroaching on my territory. I have decks that my fiance reads better than I do, and if he wants to pick one up and read with them, that's fine. He doesn't mean any disrespect, and perhaps Brandi's husband didn't either. Some decks have a poorly written LWB, and some have good ones, like my Herbal Tarot. I don't think it's fair to make an "across the board" judgement that all of them are worthless, especially since not every deck has a companion book. Just my $0.02... Illy

TemperanceAngel	11 Mar 2004
Quote: Originally posted by Ilithiya I didn't see any mention of disrespect as such in Brandi's post... perhaps what her husband did was in a sincere interest of helping by offering a comparison? I didn't say her husband was disrespectful, perhaps I should have separated the paragraphs?? That's the problem sometimes when reading stuff, it can get taken out of context... All I said was that it's disrespectful....blah blah blah et. etc. brandi, sincere apologies if you think that I said your husband was disrespectful, I didn't mean it to sound that way! I meant it to say what it said, if that makes sense?? Even I am starting to get confused now :laugh: It's great that your husband is interested :) That last part was my rant about the books that come with Tarot, we are all allowed to our own opinion, that's what a forum is all about :D Our opinions :D XTAX

Cerulean	11 Mar 2004
Sometimes as gorgeous as some designs are, the books that accompany them do not always reflect an enjoyable learning. I believe there is a workbook for the Goddess deck, the one in a blue box done by a professonal artist, Kris Waldner... http://www.artandwords.com/goddesstarot.html unless it is the Triple Goddess Tarot? If it is the Triple Goddess, the box is pink and the paintings can be beautifully abstract and have softer, brighter colorings...the chakras seem to be highlighted. May I suggest something, to perhaps assist in a brighter way, hopefully? Perhaps the pivotal card read can be looked at both positively and negatively. The strong meaning which might be somewhat disturbing can also suggest a positive turnaround as well...let's say the Devil came up and it implies a materialistic nature...it might also imply a need for material comforts, a craving that might need some positive reinforcement. But instead of following a devilish craving to go out and buy the whole store and eating a ten pound box of chocolates, it means be on the lookout for wanting to satisfy a need for material abundance...and perhaps you will encounter this need in a way you can help as well. Instead, perhaps it means going to the grocery store...and stopping at the table of Girl Scout Cookies on the way out, with your grocery cart full of salad stuff, a fluffy magazine and just enough budget and basket room for a box of cookies to help a good cause... Maybe this sounds too silly. But sometimes what we can get from a reading is a means to think and consider what step we might take up from the knowledge that we gained in a reading...even if it feels a little goofy. Best wishes, Mari H.

Pagan X	11 Mar 2004
brandi, there is no handed down on stone right way for you to have a relationship with your cards and your own intution. Go with your feelings. If you have to choke off your emotions to act "grown-up" and "correct" in playing with your own toys, they're not going to be much fun for you! If your inner toddler doesn't want to share, it's ok. For some people, it's the exact opposite, they like their cards to be handled, their cards learn more that way. My husband was the opposite of yours; mine had his own deck and used to read them before I came along, but after seeing me read, he didn't want to anymore because he felt badly about his own skill in reading. That's not right either, and I wish he didn't feel that way. He still has his first deck, from junior high years. Poor lonely deck. I hope he reads it when I'm not around.

Phoenyx*	11 Mar 2004
I wouldn't let the general public handle my cards, especially not shuffling them because I don't know what care and respect or lack thereof they would give my beloved cards. I would however let my bf handle them, at least some of them, but I'm happy enough that he has his own deck(s) (they're buried under 5 feet of Canadian winter-frozen ground in a weatherproof container, so I don't know how many he has.), and I'm happy that he's such an excellent reader. Instead of feeling my ego being bruised by the fact that he reads as well, I take pleasure in the fact that we have another thing in common and can bond over that as well as everything else. :)

mysticali	11 Mar 2004
I have to say that I have found decks where, after loving the art, have bought them and they just didn't work for me. I have a set of the Visconti tarot by Lo Scarabeo, which I love and have used to good effect on every reading but my own. My own are without excepton negative - i can't explain it. Mythic Tarot- USGames - again, loved the art and the idea but found readings confused and 'too much going on'. I no longer use these at all. You bond or you don't i guess with a set of cards. I would never let anyone else use my cards for divination though - not even husband or kids, although i don't mind them handling them. It's too personal.

brandi124	11 Mar 2004
temperanceangel, no need for apologies-- I understood what you meant and took no offense. Thanks all for the food for thought-- that's just what I needed. I think I am going to make it a personal policy to not let others handle my cards because it just feels weird to me. And I think too that I like the advice on not feeling the need to stick rigidly to what the book says a particular card means-- especially with this deck the reverse meanings are usually pretty negative and leave little room for interpretation so I'm going to go strictly on intuition for a while and see how that feels. Actually before I do that I am going to spend a while just studying each card (looking at it thinking about it) so that I can get a personal take on each one before diving back into the reading scene. Also, I like the idea of getting my husband his own deck. He is strangely intrigued and put off by my activities lately. I have been sort of on a "personal quest" lately and have taken to doing lots of reading, writing, meditating, etc and I think he is kind of wondering where he fits into the whole scheme of the things and wants to be assured that in my enlightenment he won't get "phased out". I don't think he needs to worry but I can understand why he feels that way. I just finished reading The Four Agreements and he's going to read it now and I think it will help him to not feel so antsy about what is going on with me. In the meantime, if he wants to read I told him he can use my Rider Waite deck I got on ebay because I haven't really touched them at all. Okay, sorry for rambling on and on but I wanted you all to know that the feedback is much appreciated.

Bean Feasa	11 Mar 2004
Hi Brandi124, and welcome to Aeclectic. I reckon the unease you felt with using the Goddess deck (after being so cosy with the Universal Waite) just sort of insinuated itself into your readings. The solution to this is to become a taro-holic like many of us here }) :D and have LOTS of different decks. That way you get used to adapting to a range of different imagery - some dark, some light, some fluffy etc. I think you're lucky that your husband's openminded enough to want to participate in any Tarot proceedings - mine's a complete sceptic, and refuses even to pull a single card, never mind do a reading. Btw, off-topic I know, but the Four Agreements is a great book isn't it? It lifted a lot of weight off my shoulders. Mine's all covered with underlinings and coffee-stains. And now that you've mentioned it, I think it could be time for a re-reading. blessings, Kate

Phoenix Rising	11 Mar 2004
Well look at the bright side atleast your husband is showing a interest with the tarot. It can be difficult if family and husbands etc have a problem with the tarot. I like getting reversals with my cards because they give the solution, basically what you need to do to turn that card back up to it's upright position. If I get a negative card say for instance a daily reading. like the 10 of swords, I don't get upset about it, because it's not always as traumatic as what the book says, it can be minor things like maybe a headache. You obviously take the meanings as the very worst that could happen. You're not a drama queen are you?

brandi124	11 Mar 2004
Me, a drama queen? The answer would depend on who you ask, the time of day (or month:)), circumstances, etc. I would consider a drama queen one who starts conflict for the sake of conflict and I don't think that's me but I do think that I tend to think too negatively, especially when it comes to thoughts about myself and I think that is reflected in my readings (been doing lots of thinking on this matter). Oh and Kate, I am enjoying the Four Agreements so much! I got the book yesterday night and already finished it and like you said it's one of that makes you want to read it again and again. I have been trying to see how they can help me with this situation-- For instance, I'm working on not assuming that a negative card necessarily means the worst thing I can possibly think of.

brandi124	11 Mar 2004
Also, yes I've been so glad that my husband is being supportive in my tarot interest. He is EXTREMELY supportive and if I wanted to I think he'd totally support me if I wanted to do this for a living! Someone said on another post that people who come from a religious background actually end up being the biggest believers in tarot and that seems to be true in his case. He was raised in a very christian home-- we are both christians now but not in any entirely traditional sense-- we attend a Unity Church which takes a metaphysical, more inclusive approach to christianity. Anyway-- I do worry a little that I will get shaken by how the rest of my family and his family will respond to this but as my new book tells me (the 4 agreements) I have to remember that no matter what "it's not personal", right? btw, such a good book, highly recommended!

Phoenix Rising	11 Mar 2004
You seem like a lovely person, hope everything goes well for you. You create all of your reality.

TemperanceAngel	11 Mar 2004
Quote: Originally posted by brandi124 Thanks all for the food for thought-- that's just what I needed. I think I am going to make it a personal policy to not let others handle my cards because it just feels weird to me. And I think too that I like the advice on not feeling the need to stick rigidly to what the book says a particular card means-- especially with this deck the reverse meanings are usually pretty negative and leave little room for interpretation so I'm going to go strictly on intuition for a while and see how that feels. brandi, glad that AT has been of help :D It's great that your husband is interested, I gave my husband his own deck, but he just gets me to read with it for him!!!! To me, intuition is very important in Tarot, and I teach my students (when teaching Tarot) a lot about opening up their intuition with the cards :). Of course, that's not the only way and you would find a lot of people on AT who may and will think differently to me. Tarot is such an individual thing ;) XTAX

Moongold	12 Mar 2004
Hi Brandi - I read this thread with interest, having purchased the Goddess Tarot by Kris Walherr myself last year. I have only just purchased the companion book she wrote for it. This is a review of the deck published on our own Aeclectic ~ http://www.aeclectic.net/tarot/cards/goddess/review.shtml#149 Is this the deck you own? I think it is a beautiful deck but it would be quite challenging to have as a second deck because it is quite different to the RWS. The Majors have been pretty much all renamed, and the images of Goddesses are very different to the RWS Major Aracana. It might be helpful to get the book just to get information about the particular Goddesses because that information can definitely influence readings. When I first got the deck I looked up information about each Goddess on the internet. And although I am not vastly experienced I know enough about RWS and other decks to be able to bring my knowledge of these to my readings with this deck. I also use numerology, astrology and some knowledge of the major arcana to help me with this deck. Can I make a suggestion? Get to know the deck. :) Perhaps contemplate the meaning of one card every few days until you feel that you know it reasonably well and feel comfortable with the image. It is a good deck for personal spiritual work - personal development work. There is a small study group here which has sort of died off a little. Maybe just wrap the deck in silk and leave it on your altar or in a favourite place to go back to occasionally. The cards themselves are simply images on pieces of card. It is what they evoke in us that matters. They are tools for creativity and intuition, the same as my camera is. I look after my camera because it is a creative tool for me. My mother was an amazing embroiderer and she always looked after her sewing box - wouldn't let anyone else touch it. It was something special to her. People often feel the same way about tarot decks. Perhaps you could do a reading with the deck and post it for comment in Your readings? Many blessings ~ Moongold

brandi124	12 Mar 2004
Moongold, Thank you for the advice! That is the deck that I have and I did just get the workbook and love it. It definitely helps to get background information on each of the goddesses and not just the little blurb on each that comes with the deck-- just to connect more with each card. I took a few days off from reading and just studied the cards-- looking at them, reading info about the goddesses, reading various interpretations of different cards, etc. and I had a really pleasant breakthrough last night. I did a reading about my current weightloss struggles and in the spread that I did the last card was my "overall message" and it came up as the Transformation card (aka Death) and I understood what it meant in a way I don't think I would have even a few days ago-- it can be emotional to see a death card show up at all but I just looked at it and thought about it and realized that I am afraid of changing-- I'm afraid of losing weight because it is kind of like a security blanket to be overweight right now, it protects me from uncomfortable attention and that fear of garnering attention has been blocking me in my weight loss efforts. I can feel my "intuitive vibes" churning, yeah! You're right though-- having the cards be a little different than what I got to know at first was a little off putting at first but I think the book is helping me get past that and I think this will end up being a very useful deck to help me learn about myself.

Moongold	12 Mar 2004
Hi again Brandi, That is really nice to hear. I don't have the workbook - just the companion volume but it is interesitng to know why Kris Waldherr chose the particular Goddessess she did. I have found this deck to be very gentle, perceptive and accurate in readings and I'm not surprised to read of your experience. Since getting the deck I've gotten further material on Isis as I have a particular devotion to her but there is much fascinating material available about the others too. I hope your deck brings you much happines and enlightenment every time you use it :). If you'd like to discuss any aspects of the deck post a question in the study group at http://www.tarotforum.net/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=14 or anywhere really. You are very welcome to PM as well. Moongold

DesertHowler	12 Mar 2004
For my first deck, I was given a Rider-Waite deck. For some reason I couldn't get into it. I tried purifying it by several methods. Nothing seemed to work. I got an Osho Zen and that worked fine. I went back to the Rider-Waite several times and it always seemed uncomfortable. After a few years, I got a Universal Waite. That works fine, but the original Rider-Waite still feels strange. I disposed of it recently. Now I feel much better about the whole thing. My experience, for what is worth, is somethings work and some things don't. I don't know why but this is the way of things for me. I've learned to go with it. DesertHowler

The Bad vibes on my new cards? thread was originally posted on 10 Mar 2004 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.