You, Tarot and family

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 23 Apr 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.

eastarot	23 Apr 2004
When I first began reading up on spirituality, alternative healing and learning Tarot my family members were very skeptical. Some were hurtful as well. Some even called me loony witch. However over time, with a steady flow of clients - many of whom are wonderful people, family opinions have stopped bothering me. In fact, a few family members have even had their cards read and have changed their views. Just curious to know if other fellow Tarot lovers on board have had to face family skeptics along your path?

miss_apples	23 Apr 2004
My brother in law started a fight with me on Easter because of tarot. His girlfriend brought her mom with to Easter lunch and asked me if she could show her mom my Quest Tarot. When I pulled them out he started calling them fake. I tried to nicely explain to him that to me they werent fake and thats when he started attacking me...telling me that I needed to start following "the white mans religion" of Christianity. Totally absurd...I know. I tried to explain to him that tarot had nothing to do with religion what so ever...but of course even though he hasnt studied tarot like I have, he thinks he knows more about it than I do and insisted that it was a religious thing. I cant wait to see what happens when he finds out Im a pagan....lol.

hedgecub	23 Apr 2004
My family don't know I'm into Tarot. Or the occult. Or paganism. Or Satanism. Or anything, really. They're still under the impression I'm the person I was when I left home for University: Christian, conservative, naive. Ah well :)

closrapexa	23 Apr 2004
Well, miss_apples, I haven't had that problem (my problem is I don't have the Quest Tarot! :D ) but my problem with my familly is that they have never taken this aspect of my life seriously enough. They don't understand that it is important to me. For them it is a fad, or a phase. Gee, maybe we should send this thread to a Freudean? :D

miss_apples	23 Apr 2004
Quote: Originally posted by closrapexa Well, miss_apples, I haven't had that problem (my problem is I don't have the Quest Tarot! :D ) but my problem with my familly is that they have never taken this aspect of my life seriously enough. They don't understand that it is important to me. For them it is a fad, or a phase. Gee, maybe we should send this thread to a Freudean? :D Thats kind of how my boyfriend is. He shows fake interest whenever I talk about it but doesnt really take it seriously. However if I dont take his band seriously...boy do I get scolded.

hyatt	23 Apr 2004
Well, I completely understand. I read for some of my family and then the other side has no idea. They have a hard enought time with me not going to their Baptist church. They would pull a huge freak out about my tarot cards. Oh well, I think it is Ok. If you agree with everyone then you probably need to question your ethics.

Jypsie	23 Apr 2004
My sister is the only person in my family who knows I read tarot, and she is fine with that, but she did freak out when she discovered my altar, which is in my bedroom. "Since when did you get into this witchcraft stuff?" My family- they are hard to explain- very ultra traditional Christian overprotective closeminded freaks. *shrug* I am nearly 24 years old and there is so much I can't tell them. I want to just be me, but trust me- I am already the black sheep as it is, when I used to be the good kid. Everything is under scrutiny, they tell me all the time how I'm throwing away everything they ever taught me.... whatever. *sigh* Most of my friends are very openminded and come to me for readings and advice sometimes. There's only a couple that like to TRY and trip me up so they can supposedly prove me wrong.... I ignore those after a lil debate and never read for them again.

VGimlet	23 Apr 2004
My side of the family is pretty open minded - in spite of a few aghast aunt's and uncles, my parents were pretty supportive. I would do card readings for them, and my much older brother and younger sister. My husband knew very soon after we started dating I had tarot cards, and used them. I even read for him and for my friends a few times, although from the time I was about 12 until after I was married I kept my interest in them fairly private. Not because I was uncomfortable, but because it seemed like a very personal thing to me at the time. My husband's mom is mildly interested, and his dad thinks it's hooey (but he thinks all spiritual stuff is hooey, so I don't feel bad, LOL). But even he doesn't give me a bad a time about it - he likes me, and visa versa. Honestly, I don't really care what his extended family thinks, and neither does he. I don't shove it in their faces, just like the really religious ones don't shove that in my face. :D (although I have to say Ken's dared me to bring my tarot cards to some family event sometime....)

ScarabFlight	23 Apr 2004
What a very helpful thread. Thank you. I have to say that there is no way I'll tell my mom about my cards anytime soon. She used to be alot more open, we used to play with them when I was little, but now she'd probably tell me they were satanic or something?! ::shrugs:: She freaked out that I have a tiny stud in my nose! So I'm kinda leery about telling her stuff that may be considered "controversial". Yeah, kinda sad since I haven't lived at home in over 10 years! Maybe one day I'll just say what the heck and tell her, but not quite yet. On the other hand, my husband is very supportive and his mom is too. (He's already told me to make a list so he can get me decks as gifts lol.) His sister and I both have tarot cards so there is at least one person in the family that can understand the wonderfulness that is tarot. :D

CreativeFire	23 Apr 2004
I can respect that some people may not feel comfortable about tarot cards for whatever their religious backgrounds or beliefs maybe or even that they only know what they have heard negative and positive. I am quite lucky that my close family know about my interest in Tarot. My Mum actually gave me my first deck years ago and my husband used to just humour my interest but didn't like me to let anyone else know in case they thought I was some sort of nutter or worse (that would be his strong catholic background coming out). But he is a lot more supportive these days and realises that it is not a passing fad (10 years later!) and he understands a lot more about my interest now. My son has grown up with me being into Tarot so just thinks it is a fairly everyday thing and even often points things out in shops etc that might interest me to do with Tarot - bless him :) I have some friends (and my hubbies family) - (that now know of my Tarot interest) and they are even interested to learn more about it themselves, but I still do have some friends and family that just change the subject (if it ever comes up!) - which is fine too as it is something that I do consider a bit personal and am not always having to talk about to anyone and everyone, especially since I found AT. ;) I don't go out of my way either to hide it anymore as I think of it as just part of me being me and people can either accept that or not - their choice but I am also entitled to freely live my choices as well. :) CreativeFire

Nycelle	24 Apr 2004
My father is unaware of my interest, but he would just brush it off if he knew - a bit like he brushes off my tendancy to collect notebooks or comics. . . another weird thing about the short person in the house. . . :) My mother knows and is very wary of it, but she doesn't try and interfere with it, which is the best I can hope for. My boyfriend is the same - he worries about the effect it will have on me if I get too heavily involved. Considering I can be pretty superstitious, I see why he worries. I've explained the nature of my interest and I think now it's best not discussed. He doesn't want me to stop studying, although I imagine he'd be relieved if I did. My family and significant other are about as cool with it as one could expect - I certainly won't push my luck.

mj07	24 Apr 2004
I would never let my family know about my interest in Tarot. They're all conservative Christians (mainly Baptist) and believe it has something to do with demons and devil worship. I haven't even told them I'm Buddhist (ack!) There are SO many things in my home I have to hide from them when they come for a visit, Tarot is just another one. I even have a couple of friends who slightly freaked out on me when they found out about Tarot, so now I'm careful who I even tell! Sad, but true!

InvisibleSoul	24 Apr 2004
Wow, I am not alone! I was raised in a very strict christian (baptist) home (mostly my dad's forcing, I've found out my mom is not-so-much lol)... my sister in another state knows I read for sure, but that's about it... Dad actually saw my tarot books when he came over once and had a little freak fit about me learning about it (I still don't think it registered I actually READ them LOL) so I was explaining that its more just a personal tool to discover yourself than a thing to tell the future, a physical thing to focus on and help our minds think about our situations more clearly- an ability we already have, most just lack the focus... He asked well does it say anything about jesus or god at all?? and I said "Of course! It is ALL about the truth no matter what, doing the right thing, and high morals!" and he was like "oh, okay..." and shockingly let the subject go! You don't know my dad! That was VERY surprising! I think he's forgot about it though, or just didn't realize I was learing about them to actually do readings LOL But yea... I'm 26 yrs old and very few of my family know of my cards, some know of my interest in crystals and the moon, but none of them know yet exactly how far I am from their christian religion...

Solty Dog	24 Apr 2004
I think my whole family knows that I am into Tarot but are in denial about. Im not the most organized person and most of my books and decks are in plain view to anyone who comes to the house, but there has never been any serious discourse of even questions on the subject. The only person in my family that actually knows is my cousin and only because he was with me the day I picked up one of my decks, he asked a few questions about witchcraft and psychics, but after that the subject just went away. The funny thing is that most of the people I work with know that I read Tarot. To them its just another one of Soltys strange quirks. I say its funny, because family is supposed to love you unconditionaly. So then, why is it so hard to talk about this to them and not to coworkers or complete strangers? I would love for my family or freinds for that matter to show a little interest, even a passing curiousity. As it is now, I only read for myself and occasionally for my wife. Outside of that I havent read for anyone else, and that is what I want to do. Obviously, the universe doesnt think I am ready yet, so I study and learn and when I do my first reading, I wont look like a complete novice (hopefully). B.S. Dog

miss_apples	24 Apr 2004
There are some christian themed decks I believe. I know that my gendron tarot has the virgin mary holding the baby jesus on the ace of pentacles.

DeLani	24 Apr 2004
I am quite lucky - my mom learned Tarot at the same time I did, and she gave me my first deck (the Aquarian). She used to collect decks, and has more than I do. (although I don't collect them - if a deck doesn't work for me, I pass it on...) She used to read for me when I needed it, but she hasn't read for me in a long time - like over 4 years. In a way, I think she's threatened/embarrassed/something that I may have surpassed her, since I never stopped studying and learning, and she kind of lost interest after a while. I can't really have a deep conversation with her about Tarot, because she's convinced that she knows it all, and that whatever "notion" I have isn't correct. To give her her due, she did study quite a bit about the Kabbalah and the Golden Dawn, and took the BOTA course for a while, but on other subjects she's not as learned. But that's just the way my mom is...she's a Leo...

Suriel	24 Apr 2004
my family members don't care if i'm using tarot cards annot.... they just think that i might be doing something on myself, so they don't want to disturb me.... i sometimes read for my sister too.... but of course, she shows only a little interest, like my friends are. the only problem is that, doing a reading needs a lot of my time, so i sleeps very late at night, just to at least do one or tow reading in a day, keep in touch with my tarot cards.... so my mum sometimes scolds me for sleeping so late!

The You, Tarot and family thread was originally posted on 23 Apr 2004 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.