Oh no, it's me!

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 08 May 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Osher	08 May 2004
I gave some reading last night to some people. One of the readings I realised was about my relationship to the querant. It felt very peculiar, as I tried to be as objective as possible, and use neutral language, but it was quite apparent I was describing myself. Has anyone else had this problem, and if so, how did you deal with it?

Ruby7	08 May 2004
I had this happen once. I was doing a reading for a very close male friend that I was very attracted to. He was leaving (moving back to his hometown very far away). I don't remember the question (probably something to do with his leaving and how it would work out for him), or the spread, or the cards that came up (this was 7 years ago), but the card that was me was sooo me that it was very obvious. I didn't tell him the card was me since it was something to do with a gentle, quiet , caring person who had helped him a lot (which I had), and the other qualities that I read in the card were very complementary and I would have felt conceited and full of self-importance to say hey that's me! But like your experience it really was quite apparent that I was describing myself also LOL. Wish I could remember the card, I think I will go take a look at my cards, might have been one of the Pages. Was it a positive reading, Happiness? Ruby7

Osher	08 May 2004
Positive? Interesting question, and one that I can't really answer. I'm not trying to be obtuse, it's just that things happen, and happen for a reason. Basically, the cards showed me in a good light, but also showed her conflict about me, and indecision about if to advance along side me, or not. The result was that she chose not. Positive or negative? Only time can tell, but if fate determines that we are on different paths, then it can only be for the positive, if the actual situation was negative. Pity though, I really liked her! The time there is negativity is when there is an open situation where one party is not privy to the other, and does not know where they stand. For a week I was in that boat, but at least I know now where I stand.

ribbitcat	08 May 2004
Hi Happiness :-) Yes , this happened to me - I did a reading for someone just soon after we started dating , and the cards were talking *all* about us LOL It made me feel awkward , I just kept saying "I *promise* this is the cards , not me , remember you shuffled them yourself" and other stuff like that . It didn't help me that he's kind of like a brick wall in terms of reading for - minimal feedback ... He is now my DH though ....and just as challenging to read for :-) ribbitcat

lawguy51	08 May 2004
It always happens when I read for my wife. ;) Lawguy51

Woof	08 May 2004
I'm afraid I'm just not that important to people! Woe is me...... Woof (Just goofin' folks!)

zoso	08 May 2004
This has happened to me, too. But, never in a way that is directly an issue about me, just as myself as an aspect of the issue. I try to remain objective because the reading is for someone else, so no need in clouding it with my opinions on the matter. Plus, I figure if the person came to me for a reading and I have a minor role in the question, then I give them an honest reading from the heart instead of some advice from my mind's point of view. Otherwise, they would have asked for my thoughts without the cards!

Ariana	08 May 2004
What I remember happening to me sometimes was to make a reading and found the message I was giving the person fitted exactly for me as well!! And then I questioned myself, am I reading for this person or am I reading for myself? Am I confusing things here? Is Tarot confusing characters? Well in any way I think that we read for specific persons for a reason, and that persons get us as readers for a reason as well. Hope to have been clear here! Ariana

Kahlie	10 May 2004
When I just bought my Tarot Cards, my Ex asked me to do a reading because he was interested and curious about the Cards. I warned him that I didn't know how well a Reading would go and that he should ask a neutral question. His Question was: "What do I have to do to improve my chances of happiness" I did a CC spread and among other things I drew on position 7 (How I see myself) Princess of Cups (reversed). My immediate thoughts on seeing the Spread where: "I shouldn't have agreed on this"... His Reading showed to me that he needed to let me go. That he saw himself as trying to patch up the broken relationship, while it was not possible to fix it. He had to move on and have more hope and strength to move forward in life. (Both the Star rx and Strength Rx showed in his reading) He also drew 6 of Disk RX and 5 of Swords, showing me that he thought he had things worked out, while in fact that was not completely true. While is was hard for me to tell him what I really felt about the Spead, and he accused me of already thinking that in my mind, it did improve how we interact. At least now I know that he has trouble letting me go, because he's afraid of losing me for good. (Not even having a friendship) We had a good talk afterwards. So all in all it wasn't that bad....

gareth.	10 May 2004
I think Ariana is right to guard against confused messages.Surely we must all know that tarot can draw in our emotions. If we read for others with whome have emotional links we simply take that on board. We read with that awareness.

Dark_angel	10 May 2004
I did a reading for my flatmate's girlfriend, and it was all about how she saw me. Basically, she didn't like the fact that her boyfriend was living with me, and saw me as a threat. The reading was all about how she wasn't sure if she could trust me or not. In the end, she decided she couldn't, and we don't really speak much anymore. :(

TemperanceAngel	11 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by Happiness I gave some reading last night to some people. One of the readings I realised was about my relationship to the querant. It felt very peculiar, as I tried to be as objective as possible, and use neutral language, but it was quite apparent I was describing myself. Has anyone else had this problem, and if so, how did you deal with it? Yes, I have years ago when I was reading for a male (gulp) friend, I just pretended it was someone else I described....it was weird, really weird.... XTAX

closrapexa	11 May 2004
I had that once not long ago. I started developing feelings toward my best friend (which I have since gotten over) and in her reading I saw myself smiling up at me. Completely freaked me out. I started humming and hawing, and then moved on to other things. One of the few instances I allowed myself not to tell the querent everything I saw, since I saw that the reading was too heavily influenced by my own perspective.

Kahlie	11 May 2004
Quote: One of the few instances I allowed myself not to tell the querent everything I saw, since I saw that the reading was too heavily influenced by my own perspective. Don't you always see a reading in your own perspective? I felt really wrong not telling everything I saw, because I didn't want to upset him. So in the end, I did tell him everything, but I wrote it down after the Reading and Emailed it to him.

closrapexa	11 May 2004
Of course, but what I meant was that the reading was too heavily influenced by my feelings toward her. I tried to disconnect myself from my feelings toward her, but couldn't. Hence the reading wasn't a "real" reading, but a projection of my own feelings, not her's. I've heard a theory that when you read for a loved one, or use readings as a substitute for talking, the cards will often rat on you.

Kahlie	11 May 2004
Well, it was a real reading alright. I saw his face when I told him what I saw. He turned possibly white, and then became very upset. Which told me that I did indeed hit the mark. The Cards ratted out on him... But I guess I took it a bit differently then most people from this Thread did. I didn't see "me" as a love interest for him, nor was I interested in a relationship with him again. I just wanted to help, and it was kind of a shock when I realised that he had lied about letting go of me. And that he should really work on that to become happy himself. Later on we had a good talk about what it meant for him. So it was not a subsitute for talking at all. It was a good tool for understanding though.

LaLa	12 May 2004
i did this just recently in a reading for a new workmate. there was strong indication (can't remember the exact cards) that someone he relied on would let him down but he would ultimately prosper if he focused on the creative aspect of his work. It was confusing for me at first because I got a strong sense it was me this was talking about and worried that I wouldn't be able to support him in his work (which IS what my job is about) It finally became apparent a few days later when I made a firm decision to leave my present job. It's not a decision I regret I think it will be a good thing for him and the company in the end it's just a bit of an awkward transition. The sensation of recognising yourself in someone elses reading is disturbing but like Ariana said there's a reason why things happen the way they do (even if we can't figure it out for a while) La

The Oh no, it's me! thread was originally posted on 08 May 2004 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.