Who buys your tarot cards?

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 25 May 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Willow_tree	25 May 2004
i've heard alot of different things and I am having trouble figuring out which was true. First I heard that your first tarot deck had to be a gift, then you could buy your own. Second I heard all your decks had to be gifts. then I heard you arent supposed to buy any for yourself. My boyfriend thinks this because he believes then the cards would give you the answers you want to hear, rather than the truth. then I heard that tarot decks dont have to be gifts at all. That someone has to buy them for you was just a rumor people started. I was just wondering if anyone on here could tell me what they thought about this? It's kind of a silly question but I've discussed it with a few people and never got the same answer! Thanx for yourhelp

Mimers	25 May 2004
I don't believe that your first deck, or any deck has to be a gift. I have bought most of my decks myself, and have not had any bad readings or luck or anything of that nature. The only thing I can say about the ones that were gifts is that they mean more to me and are very special. That does add to the reading. Welcome! Mimi

Rusty Neon	26 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by Willow_tree First I heard that your first tarot deck had to be a gift, then you could buy your own. Second I heard all your decks had to be gifts. I wish all that were true. Nobody would have ever bought me any tarot deck(s) at all. If I weren't allowed to buy my own decks, look at all the money I would have saved. :)

HudsonGray	26 May 2004
Myth! Myth! Myth! It's just like any other item in the stores, you buy your own if you want, or accept one as a present, but there's nothing to all the superstitions. Spend your cash on the decks you really want & make out a Christmas list for relatives to help you get your collection started.

closrapexa	26 May 2004
The way I see it, the cards are just a tool. You are the one doing the "magic" and the caeds only facilitate. Hence the decks do not have to be gifts. And anyway, if we all waited for thers to give us cards as presents, we would never get many wonderful decks!!

Island Dreamer	26 May 2004
No-one I know is ever likely to buy me a deck as a present so I have to buy all my own. But buying your own does have the advantage of being able to choose decks that really appeal to you. I can't imagine anything worse than being given a 'fluffy' whimsical deck if you're really into dragons or dark gothic decks! Besides, you're far more likely to use a deck that appeals to you than one than you dislike. Dreamer

crystal cove	26 May 2004
I don't believe in the myths. I highly doubt the cards know who purchased them. ;) I've done the shopping and purchasing of most of my decks and I wouldn't have it any other way. That was half the fun. :) My husband bought a few decks for me but he knew I wanted them, he didn't just pick out something himself.

Sulis	26 May 2004
Quote: My boyfriend thinks this because he believes then the cards would give you the answers you want to hear, rather than the truth. The answers you'll get with tarot, don't in my opinion come from the cards at all, they come from you. The cards are pieces of cardboard with symbols and pictures on them. You interpret those symbols and pictures - If you like a deck and you want it, buy it - you could wait forever for someone to buy it for you :) Love Sulis xx

Khatruman	26 May 2004
Can we just post a big sign at the entrance of this forum that says, "Tarot decks DO NOT have to be gifts!! Buy the one you want!"????? I'm sorry for the frustration, Willow tree, but I am getting frustrated by this silly superstition that keeps surfacing every week or so. The power is in you to develop! It is not in a magic deck of cards that can only be used if someone offers you them as a gift. Develop YOUR power of intuition. These are stacks of cardboard with pictures that help you understand something deep and meaningful, but the power starts with YOU!

Chronata	26 May 2004
I recieved about half of my decks as gifts, and the other half I bought and paid for. They all work the same way... (well, OK that's not entirely true...my RWS and my TdM don't work the same at all...but it has nothing to do with one being a gift...) Have I just completely confused the matter yet? Agree with everything already said...Cards is cards...and they will only work if you trust in yourself that they will, and spend some time working with them. It has nothing at all to do with how you got them.

diane drizzy	26 May 2004
Mine, mine all mine!!!!! Like Island Dreamer said what if I get fluff?? I love my cards that I get. On the other hand I will accept donations for a new deck. :D I just find it too personal an experience to have someone to choose for me.

crystal cove	26 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by Khatruman Can we just post a big sign at the entrance of this forum that says, "Tarot decks DO NOT have to be gifts!! Buy the one you want!"????? I'm sorry for the frustration, Willow tree, but I am getting frustrated by this silly superstition that keeps surfacing every week or so. Please DO!! In addition, can we post one about reversals, shuffling and all the other ones that have been beaten to death? ;)

Willow_tree	26 May 2004
I've bought most of my decks, and I haven't had any problems. I posted the question to solve an arguement I've had with other tarot readers lately. Thanx

Khatruman	26 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by Willow_tree I've bought most of my decks, and I haven't had any problems. I posted the question to solve an arguement I've had with other tarot readers lately. Thanx Tell ya what... if other readers start running some superstitious mumbo-jumbo by you again, just refer them straight here!!! :D Would love to have them as part of the discussion!!!

HudsonGray	26 May 2004
You know, where would the cards pick up their mystery? When the paper is ordered by the publisher? When the inks go on the sheets at the printer? When the cards get sliced apart by cutters & are assembled? When they get packed in cellophane? When the decks get machine shoved into boxes? On the truck taking them to the warehouse? When the smaller boxes get shipped to the stores? When they get placed on the shelves? At what point do they supposedly pick up this mysterious ability to gel together & need to be 'gifted' to someone to work? Next time someone says something, walk them back through the different stages & ask them where the cards suddenly 'turned on' to act different than any other item printed on paper for the general public. Imagine how we'd be acting if all BOOKS had to be gifted to be able to be read properly?

dolphingirl	26 May 2004
I have been lucky that most of my decks have been gifts but I have no problem with going out and buying a deck if I really want it. The ones I have recieved as gifts are special to me because of the person that gave them to me not because of any magic that says that is the way I had to get them. If I have the money and buy myself a deck then I am giving myself a gift :)

galadrial	26 May 2004
The Universe has chosen to gift humanity with the tarot. I think there is enough mystery in that without getting superstitious about the decks themselves. Tell them to accept the Universe's gift by going out and buying themselves a deck:-)

yve	26 May 2004
my first deck came from my uncle, another deck came from my mom....othewise, i'm the guilty one for obsessing!

Solty Dog	26 May 2004
I have bought all of my tarot decks. The only one I may not buy is the one I hope to get for fathers day. But I picked that out as well. So, technically I am still buying it but through an intermediary. B.S. Dog

Star Spirit	27 May 2004
Any "musts" or "have tos" about tarot are purely superstition. They're really just cards, so whether or not they were received as a gift should have nothing to do with it, aside from the sentimental value. If you were only seeing what you wanted to see in the cards, it's because you're being biased, not because buying your own cards makes you read improperly. That's just silly :)

Zoe Kate	27 May 2004
Before I knew much about Tarot, a friend told me that you should never buy a deck, that a deck should ALWAYS be a gift. I sort of believed her, figuring I didn't know much about the whole thing anyway. Then when the deck I wanted didn't show up under the Christmas tree one year, I thought to myself "Screw it!" and went straight out and bought one. I've had many great readings from it, and no warts have appeared on my fingers from touch it ;)

Jewel	27 May 2004
For the most part I do. Sometimes friends, some times the hubby, but mostly me. I know that when the hubby, my Aeclectic friends or myself buy the decks I am getting something that I really really want, when others do (which is very rarely) they usually don't ask what I want so it can be scary, although I have been awfuly lucky! The parents would die before they bought me a deck *LOL*

Moonbow*	27 May 2004
My husband ....... but he doesn't know..... shshhhh! ;)

Flavio	27 May 2004
Only my 2nd deck was a gift, altough it was given to me with the best intention I couldn´t read with it (maybe when I become more experienced), other decks I bought myself. If in the near future someone wants to give me a deck as a present I will tell which one I prefer. Greetings

hedgecub	28 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by HudsonGray Imagine how we'd be acting if all BOOKS had to be gifted to be able to be read properly? Excellent metaphor! :) There seem to be many superstitions of this sort hovering over various magical and occult tools, such as wands, ritual daggers (athames), and of course tarot decks. Now, I don't see anyone having the same ideas about any other tools, such as computers, cars, or trash bags... (And if I did hear of someone who believed their trash bags wouldn't dispose of trash properly unless they were a gift during the waxing moon or somesuch, I'd be really rather surprised. ;) ) Over 80% of my decks were my own purchases; the others were mostly gifts given after I'd strongly hinted that I'd like such-and-such deck for my birthday/Christmas. The decks that I connect with most strongly have about the same gift:own_purchase ratio. So from my limited statistical sample, I'd say it really doesn't matter :)

purple_scorp	29 May 2004
Is it Deja Vue or is my head cold getting the better of me? I know I've seen this thread before and posted in it.....but I haven't posted over the last couple of days in THIS thread. purple_scorp

Khatruman	29 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by purple_scorp Is it Deja Vue or is my head cold getting the better of me? I know I've seen this thread before and posted in it.....but I haven't posted over the last couple of days in THIS thread. purple_scorp No, it is just that these poor souls who are trying to learn tarot are being told the same silly superstitions... thus the same question appears over and over... At least these folks are asking the question, not taking the silly assumption!!! :D

beeswing	29 May 2004
I must be the only person here who has not heard of this superstition! Okay...it may be because I live in the middle of nowhere and I don't actually, physically, know any tarot people....but at this stage of my life, I KNOW I wouldn't have the patience to wait for someone to give me a tarot deck even if I had heard of this superstition. My first tarot deck was a gift from my brother, who apparently knew me better than I knew myself at the time. But every deck since then has been purchased by me. Besides (and I don't know why this is), it seems when some people decide to give you a gift, it is usually something they think you should have and not something that you want or need. I think tarot cards as something personal and should be picked out by the person who is going to use them. :) beeswing

Nycelle	30 May 2004
I've said it before, and I'll say it again - taking up any new interest is really a decision to grab your life with both hands. To pursue a new interest is an active state. Waiting for a deck to drop into your lap before you can start is a passive state, and the two don't match. Get active. I know people who were gifted a deck which awakened their interest, and that is a different matter and perfectly OK. I just hate the idea of someone wanting to pursue something and having to wait for someone else to make the decision for them. It's even killing me that I have to wait until I can afford a sax.

Luminessence	03 Jun 2004
I don't think it matters whether you get them as gifts or whether you buy them yourself. I've bought all but one of my decks myself, and the one I got as a gift is the one I've never really been able to connect with. I think it's good to be able to choose your own decks, so that you can find ones that really speak to you.

The Who buys your tarot cards? thread was originally posted on 25 May 2004 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.