Reading for Abused Children
Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 14 Nov 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.
| Kittaine |
14 Nov 2004 |
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The kids' age range from 12 to 17. They live in a crisis center. All of them have at one point lived in the streets. Contrary to popular belief, they're very lively and friendly kids! One of them has been diagnosed with mild schizophrenia. Others with depression. But they do a great job of hiding it! Any advice or ideas on how to deal with this group? It would be greatly appreciated! How can I use the Tarot to help them in some way? I really wanna make some sort of difference in their lives using the Tarot.
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| jmd |
14 Nov 2004 |
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Depending on how you are working with children, and whether in a group or singly, it may be possible to get them to work on creating a deck - to make it simpler, you could have the outlines already done, and the artistic work of the slow colouring-in process become a healing tool.
Though not for the purpose of healing, you may want to see some images from a school in France in which the creator of the wonderful Tarot de la Félicité worked as artist-in-residence to create, with a class, the Tarot Léo Férré: once on the link below, scroll down towards the bottom of the page and check the working images for the deck:
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| Kittaine |
14 Nov 2004 |
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That's a great idea, jmd! Thanks! I might try that someday. But for now, my problem is how to do a reading for them. I know I would definitely do it one-on-one. I can't read for the whole group and run the risk of "uncovering" or "triggering" something in public. Best to have some privacy.
In a one-on-one reading, how should I deal with the kid? Should I let her (they're all girls) do all the asking, or...? Eh...I really don't have any idea how to deal with this.
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| yupkigirl |
14 Nov 2004 |
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Hi Kittaine!
I think the first thing you should do is ask the head/supervisor of the crisis center for permission to do readings for these girls. They are still minors---and their traumatic experiences might trigger something in them, as you said so yourself, when you do readings for them. Another factor you have to consider is how the head of the crisis center will view tarot. Just make sure you explain what tarot is all about and what you want to achieve by doing readings for the girls. If s/he agrees to let you do readings, I have the feeling that s/he might also ask you to read for her :D Or perhaps if the girls feel that they are not "too old" for storytelling, why not use the cards for storytelling---the fool's journey (or the bateleur's journey if you like that story) perhaps.
These are just suggestions and I hope they help :)
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| Kittaine |
14 Nov 2004 |
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Hi Kittaine!
I think the first thing you should do is ask the head/supervisor of the crisis center for permission to do readings for these girls. They are still minors---and their traumatic experiences might trigger something in them, as you said so yourself, when you do readings for them. Another factor you have to consider is how the head of the crisis center will view tarot. Just make sure you explain what tarot is all about and what you want to achieve by doing readings for the girls. If s/he agrees to let you do readings, I have the feeling that s/he might also ask you to read for her :D Or perhaps if the girls feel that they are not "too old" for storytelling, why not use the cards for storytelling---the fool's journey (or the bateleur's journey if you like that story) perhaps.
These are just suggestions and I hope they help :)
Yes, I already asked the supervisors and they LOVE the idea! :D And yes, they asked for a reading! Heeheee.
About using the cards for storytelling...how exactly do I do that, yupkigirl? You gotta very interesting idea there.
Thanks for the suggestion! :D
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| Waterdancer |
14 Nov 2004 |
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I experienced some abuse as a child and I am sure what the girls will appreciate more than anything is the validation of what they experienced and the time you are giving them.
You might want to let the girls pick their own deck for the reading in case some of them are turned off by a certain deck. A lot of abusers use fear and superstition to control their victims so I would be certain to reassure them that the tarot is a positive thing and there are no bad cards and they are not powerless to change their future if they get a less than positive answer.
I would try to make it fun at first and if it goes well do a more "serious" reading later.
Good luck and bless you for the time you are taking to work with these girls.
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| Anna |
14 Nov 2004 |
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Kittaine, this is such a wonderful idea! Its great that the supervisor is so happy for you to do it :)
Are you going to be working with the group over a few weeks or is it more of a one off thing that you are doing?
If you can, and have the time, I would aggree with waterdancer's suggestion of making it fun and lighthearted at first. Trust is such an important issue for abused children.
I think if it were me, I would try to help the children to read for themselves. I'd ask them what they saw in the cards and what the pictures mean to them. Partly, because I would want for them to be as in control of the reading as possible. But also because children who have experienced abuse are highly empathic. For many, their survival will have depended on being able to accuratly "read" the atmosphere within a room or the emotional state of an abuser. I think that they would really enjoy learning about how to use tarot for themselves.
It reminds me of that expression, I can't remember it exactly, but its something like - "give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day, teach him how to fish, and you've fed him for a lifetime"
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| Scorpion |
15 Nov 2004 |
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Kittaine - I don't know how valid or feasible this is as an idea, but it occurred to me that the might enjoy creating their own interpretations on the cards: a sort of creative artwork session, perhaps? Alternatively, I think someone has mentioned the idea of story-telling - I did this for a while with my two younger stepsons and they thoroughly enjoyed it. It actually got one of them interested in reading again (he was fixated by the Arthurian Legends deck and even prepared to read some of the stories to me, which was quite an achievement) and the other was happy with the Inner Child deck and quite prepared to make up stories - although somehow they always involved all the swords and everybody died, but maybe that's just boys for you!
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| rosesred |
15 Nov 2004 |
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I worked with 'damaged' kids myself, and it is very difficult to get through. These kids have nothing to expect from grown-ups, so they will positively not listen if you tell them what they should do (you probably weren't planning on doing this anyway). The first time it might be good to just draw one or two cards, indicating their present situation. Then ask them what they recognize in the cards. Don’t ask them if they recognize anything, since they’ll just say no. If they don’t talk, just be silent to. Eventually they’ll realize that it might not be so scary to talk to you, and they’ll break the silence.
Succes, I hope (no, I know) that you can help them.
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The Reading for Abused Children thread was originally posted on 14 Nov 2004 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.
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