Long Lost Recovery...and Discovery!
Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 21 Dec 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.
| Chronata |
21 Dec 2004 |
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As some of you here may know, I used to read almost exclusively with one deck.
For about 14 years or so, I used my beloved Hanson Roberts deck for almost every reading...friends and clients alike.
Then I inexplicably lost it.
It's how I ended up here on Aeclectic...how I found myself reading in new ways,(reversals even!) with different kinds of decks I wouldn't have dreamed of reading with previously...and how I made some wonderful lasting friendships.
Yesterday, the Apartment People came to fix the gap in my sliding glass door, which meant that I had to clean out the corner...and there, under a box, behind the Heads (don't ask!) stuffed under a chair, Inside a backpack...
was my lost, lonely, lovely misplaced Hanson Roberts deck!!!!
Still in it's shredded little beaded bag, and faded fabric...
Still containing mini train schedules, losing lottery tickets and a two dollar bill.
I sat there, carefully unwrapping the deck, my hands shaking slightly...
and then...
I looked at the cards.
It's difficult to describe what went through my Head. And my Heart at the moment.
Here...I thought...I should be exstatic! Thrilled to recovery my Lost Love!
But the cards looked...well.. USED . This deck doesn't wear it's Wear quite as well as my Rider Waite does.
There's smudgey flecks of some kind of dirt -like substance on almost every card. Though the smudgey bits are quite random as to where they show up.
The sides of the cards are almost black.
Some cards have ghostly indentations of other cards on the surface.
And some of the cards are spotted from the times I read them during freak thunderstorms.
They are bowed pretty dramatically as well.
I couldn't help but think...how I used to think that having this deck made me look like a professional...someone who was reading tarot for sooo long that the cards proved it!
Now, all I can think is that they make me look like someone who doesn't take good care of thier tools.
Feeling a strange mix of disappointment and relief, I quickly ordered them and wrapped them back up, and put them on the shelf next to all the new realitives.
*This morning, before comming here, I took them out again, sat in the window, which is bright and quiet thanks to the blanket of snow outside.
I just held them in my hands, breathing deeply.
And there is magic there.
Quietly, and slowly waking up from hibernation...but I could feel this intense rush of memories and energies, and emotions and past discoveries.
and despite the smudgey bits...there is no other deck where the cards slide so perfectly and elegantly off each other.
I still do not know what to think about my long lost deck. I still do not know if I will take it up again and read with it like before.
I imagine it will take some time.
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| contrascarpe |
21 Dec 2004 |
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Chronata -
Perhaps the cards were affected from being buried under all the heads, hehe.
Funny you should mention this deck. I recently remembered that I briefly owned this deck in my teen years, and have no idea where they ended up (probably the landfill). But yesterday, I was doing some last minute Christmas shopping for Gardener and I saw the Whimsical Tarot, also drawn by Hanson-Roberts. I immediately had to have them (yes, I bought myself a Xmas present, but justified it by buying two presents for Gardener).
So on the day your Hanson-Roberts returned to you, I impulsively bought my first Hanson-Roberts drawn deck in over 30 years.
Dan
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| Red Emma |
21 Dec 2004 |
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Chronata,
What a lovely, poignant story. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Blessings
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| other |
21 Dec 2004 |
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I came across a deck of giant Rider-Waite tarot cards while cleaning out a storage locker as a favor to someone. I was told to keep whatever I wanted, toss whatever I didn't and, for whatever reason, I kept the deck. They're a bit large for my tastes, and I've since bought my own Morgan-Greer deck, but I guess Tarot sort of found me that day.
I went to the library to get a novel I'd been wanting to read (but not buy!) and I perused the new arrivals for the heck of it and saw a Tarot Spell book. I checked it out and got hooked! Prior to purchasing the Morgan-Greer deck, and just wanting a smaller, more manageable deck, I remembered that I'd also received a deck in a Jane Magazine gift bag a few years back. In one of my apartment moves, I must have lost or tossed them. I was so bummed!! I'd hung on to them for a long time, not really sure what to do with them at the time.
In any case, it seems to me that Tarot kept trying to get my attention! I finally succumbed, when things in my life were quiet enough. It was a tough time of soul searching and reaching out and really wanting to listen for answers. I am not an avid Tarot reader, like many of you (it's still somewhat new to me), but I find it so helpful in learning about oneself and the cycles of life that are so inevitable. Glad it found me. :)
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| Kit |
21 Dec 2004 |
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Beautiful story, Chronata. I suppose it will take a while for your cards to "catch up" to you after you have spent so long growing and learning away from them.
There's smudgey flecks of some kind of dirt -like substance on almost every card. Though the smudgey bits are quite random as to where they show up.
Are the smudgey flecks chocolate?
Raeven
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| Majecot |
21 Dec 2004 |
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Chronata, I think it was a darn good thing those Appartment People came to fix your slider ;)
How wonderful that you have found your old friend... I remember your distress over them. So they may not look exactly as you remember (do any of us?) but yet.. do they not feel the same, just feel right in your hands? It is a beautiful thing when loved one comes home isn't it. All the wonderful memories you have to share with each other. So what if they have a few wrinkles now. :)
...now where is Umbrae with that card cleaning recipe
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| lark |
21 Dec 2004 |
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Chronata the universe gave you a christmas prezzy! :D
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| Alta |
21 Dec 2004 |
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I guess that I had a somewhat different thought when I read your story. And it is a lovely story.
We human tends to cast our own 'glamour' spells on inanimate objects and on other human beings for that matter. Love could almost be described as casting a glamour spell on both the other and yourself. And when you fall out of love, suddenly he/she looks plainer, seems dumber, has flakes on them. :)
When you first found the cards you saw them as they are. They next morning you cast your own glamour spell and they became softened and hazed by memory and emotion. Nothing wrong with that. The world would be a harsh, unkind and unforgiving place without it.
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| Jewel-ry |
22 Dec 2004 |
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*This morning, before comming here, I took them out again, sat in the window, which is bright and quiet thanks to the blanket of snow outside.
I just held them in my hands, breathing deeply.
And there is magic there.
Quietly, and slowly waking up from hibernation...
This is so beautifully put Chronata! I'm glad you found them.
:)
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| Chronata |
22 Dec 2004 |
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Thanks everyone! :)
It was really nice to find them again, because it just proves again to me that nothing is ever really lost. They were missing for a little over two years!
But...on the other hand, I find it difficult to decide how to proceed...
You see...looking through them again (with...I am almost positive...that glamour that Marion speaks of!) I can see how incredibly easy it would be to just fall back into the old habits...reading these particular cards exclusively again...with the same spread...in the same ol' way...it really is almost too easy...
But does that discount all that I have learned in the past couple of years? Does that make any of the new ways of reading invalid? Does that make the BB Cats, Fradella, Spiral, Buckland and Ferret go back on the shelf along with the other "hardly used" decks? Am I too too worried about this? ;)
I am pretty sure I can use them again...intergrating everything I have learned since...but I am just so "used to" the images...that it is almost unlikely that I can get past them.
But then again...the Hanson Roberts deck has always been mydeck...the one that best reflects me, and my view of the world. I really love those illustrations.
Contrascarpe...I think you will really gel with the Whimsical! It is sweet and childlike and full of wonder. It's really funny, because when Laura gave me her Hanson Roberts deck...the one that I just knew instinctively was missing a card...I almost felt like they were too used looking to read with well...and they are in a whole lot better shape than my deck!
Raeven...Yes! I have been growing and learning away from this deck...which is why I am concerned about taking it up again, and just forgetting everything I have learned. Alas...the smudgey bits are not chocolate...although they do look like it!
Majecot...oh it is wonderful when a loved one returns home after being "lost" for a while. In fact, I looked at the cards again today...and realized just how much I really love the pictures. They are all old friends to me...especially those court cards! the tiny replacement HR that I bought to replace them doesn't really do the drawings justice at all! Or at least...they don't seem quite as "alive" as these do. They do definately feel right in my hands.
Time to try them out, and see what they say...
Hey, does anyone have a spread for reconnecting with a deck after a long time?
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| smokey |
23 Dec 2004 |
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Ooohhh,my dear Chronata,
What WonDerFul -Holiday -Magick for you, and what a LuVerLy Christmas storey for me to enjoy! Bless you for sharing, and may you and yours have a grand old 'tyme' this holiday week!!! Bright Blessings for the New Year also...
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The Long Lost Recovery...and Discovery! thread was originally posted on 21 Dec 2004 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.
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