anyone else dislike..

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 06 Feb 2005, and now archived in the Forum Library.

MikeoBlend	06 Feb 2005
does neone else dislike talking about people other than youself/who your doing the reading for in a reading. mainly of course love questions...i think myself id find it intrusive if neone did a reading which related to me in some way without my knowledge. its difficult to get round sometimes, but i dunno...thoughts?

Simone	07 Feb 2005
Mike, first of all, welcome to the boards :D When I do readings for someone who then starts asking questions about others, I tell them I am not reading for third persons, except if I have their approval. Of course, we are all part of a system, we never stand alone and there are always relationship bonds, and those, if they come up in the reading, I read them. But specific questions are a no-no for me. This is part of my ethical boundaries I put in place recently, because it is none of my business to go ferreting into someone's life who does not know or agree to it. If I am reading about someone else in private (i.e. for myself), I always first either pull a card to see if the other person would agree, or connect to my and his/her guides for approval. And if I get a NO, I'll stick to it! But all this is mainly a personal ethics question. After all this, I have to say I do not think harm will come of someone reading about me/you without me/you knowing it - I guess this is a control issue and I have let go of that a long time ago. It is the same as about gossip - I say: let them talk about me, if it pleases them, and actually see it as a compliment - my life is interesting enough to inspire someone else to talk about it ;) So you could analyse what really bothers you in others reading about you, and maybe change your attitude to seeing it as a compliment :D Love Simone

caridwen	07 Feb 2005
It's a difficult one because we are caught in a web of interconnecting relationships. For example, How can I get on better with my mother? This naturally brings in another person ie The mother... What are you going to say to the querent? Please don't ask about your mother, just ask about yourself. Querent looks puzzled. I am asking about myself. Yes, but you're also asking about your mother...and so it goes on. That's a different question to, for example, what does my mother keep in that locked chest in the basement? Well, that's frankly none of their business...and so it goes on.

Simone	07 Feb 2005
Caridwen, that's why is distinguish between direct and indirect questions :) "How can I get on better with my mother" is not about the mother, in my opinion, but about the querent - his experience with his mother, his attitude, his thoughts, and the way the question is formulated indicates he wants to know what he can do, not what his mother can do to improve the relationship. Now this closet - first of all I'd tell them that the cards cannot tell him with a guarantee of accuracy what's in there besides the fact that if the cabinet is locked it means it is something the mother does not want us to know about and we should respect her privacy ;) Love Simone

caridwen	07 Feb 2005
Simone wrote: Caridwen, that's why is distinguish between direct and indirect questions :) "How can I get on better with my mother" is not about the mother, in my opinion, but about the querent - his experience with his mother, his attitude, his thoughts, and the way the question is formulated indicates he wants to know what he can do, not what his mother can do to improve the relationship. Now this closet - first of all I'd tell them that the cards cannot tell him with a guarantee of accuracy what's in there besides the fact that if the cabinet is locked it means it is something the mother does not want us to know about and we should respect her privacy ;) Love Simone Thank you Simone - seconding the point I'm trying to make:)

Fudugazi	07 Feb 2005
Simone wrote: Now this closet - first of all I'd tell them that the cards cannot tell him with a guarantee of accuracy what's in there besides the fact that if the cabinet is locked it means it is something the mother does not want us to know about and we should respect her privacy ;) Unless it's the querent's birth certificate which proves that the querent is the long-lost heir to a long line of bards, and was stolen at birth by a witch, known as "the mother" (whenever I had a fight with my mother when I was a child, that was my fantasy ;))

Fulgour	07 Feb 2005
I'm usually too busy explaining what the cards had to say, to really get drawn very much in to thrid party sidetracks. I think it's Ok for people to ask (within reason). Why not? That's how we think sometimes. Let the "Tarot" respond.

WalesWoman	08 Feb 2005
Introspective quesitons are the easiest to answer, it's when we start asking about others that it gets sticky. How can we know what that person is really thinking or feeling, unless we can have the ability to get into their skin. If we really had that ability then we wouldn't need to use the tarot to try to figure it out. That's why relationship spreads can be so hard, it's tough enough trying to figure our ownselves out much less the "unknown" quantity of a third party. But that does't mean I haven't tried and still do try to figure out what is going on with someone. Although the very best way to get the answer to our question is to ask the person themselves...tho' whether or not they would answer honestly is up for debate, depending on the question of course. So sure, why not ask, what are this person's intentions, what do they want with me, etc. I feel as long as the questions and intent behind the questions are to help or improve something and not meant to harm anyone, or for personal gain...like betting on the super bowl (which I would have lost!) that tarot isn't inappropriate. If it can help my understanding of someone I am dealing with, than it's all to the good. In fact that's how Tarot works best, when it's used with the best intentions to help create something better. maybe that's too naive, but oh well.

MikeoBlend	08 Feb 2005
thank you for the replys people. :)

The anyone else dislike.. thread was originally posted on 06 Feb 2005 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.