Lost connection

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 07 May 2005, and now archived in the Forum Library.

jayde	07 May 2005
I was wondering if this has happened to anyone else. I've had a Haindl deck for years, but I haven't done any readings for a while. When I took the cards back out and shuffled them around...I felt nothing for them. Before, the images of the Haindl had a deep connection with me. I always felt an anticipation when I looked at the art. Can you just loose the connection with a particular deck?

Emily	07 May 2005
Hi jayde, I think you can lose the connection. My second deck was the Spiral, before that I had been using the RWS but never really connected to the artwork (it was the so-called Original with the limited colours) but the Spiral was my special deck until the day I picked it up and realised that my readings were getting harder and harder to do until the final day when I took the deck, dealt cards and got nothing - I might just as well have been looking at blank pieces of card. I put the Spiral away then seemed to go through endless decks trying to find one to really connect to again, all the time staying within the RWS symbolism. I did eventually find that deck in the Morgan Greer, just as I was about to give up on my tarot studies this deck popped back into my life 15 months after I first tried to buy it. :) I didn't think of the Spiral again until about a month ago when someone on here mentioned a particular card and instead of the Morgan Greer version of it the Spiral version came to mind. I went and got the deck out of the tarot bookshelf, shuffled a few times and did a few readings. A month down the line I'm still using the deck, its an uneasy friendship, I don't really trust the Spiral completely yet but I'm getting good honest, if gut-punching readings with it - the connect isn't half as strong as it used to be but nothing could replace the Morgan Greer now but the Spiral is still a beautiful deck. The Haindl is another visually impressive deck, I have it but never really got on with the artwork plus I didn't have the time to really get into it, maybe just shuffling and looking through the cards without reading them will get the connection going again or put them away for a while and when the times right you'll get them out again. I can remember feeling really gutted when I placed the Spiral back into the tarot shelf and it was left there for over 2 years.

similia	07 May 2005
I am having the same problem with my thoth deck at the moment. I used it for a series of readings that I hads been postponing for some time (through fear of getting an answer I didn't like). Now when I try to use the deck I get nothing useful. I even read for someone else with it with incredibly crapppy results. :( So I have put the deck away for a little while.

bleuivy	07 May 2005
I was just discussing this on a different thread. A few years ago I lost the connection I had to my Thoth as well. I didn't just lose it, though. I can't even stand to touch the deck now, and am actually considering burning it. :eek: My suggestion would be not to force it. If you don't feel the connection, maybe it's time to put the deck away for a while, and then revisit it, like Emily did with her Spiral. And, of course, the search for a great replacement deck can be kinda fun. :D Edited to add" Woo hoo! 401st post! Somehow I missed lucky 400, so I shall celebrate with 401 instead.

mike gorth	07 May 2005
I have seen a lot of success and failures with the thoth. I have it but I can't use it. I just don't care for it too much. Anyway, when I was training and learning the tarot, I was using the Universal Waite and it was always a nice deck to me but I sort of shoved it out of the way for the Hanson-Roberts which our connection is outstanding. The Universal was my first deck but I just don't like it at all. So now if I ever pick it up, I get no sense of connection unlike the Hanson where I touch a card and I'm immediately in a meditative state.

Moonbow*	07 May 2005
Surely this is why we have multiple decks! :) If I lose a connection with a deck, I change decks for a while. The Thoth is a deck which I have had a strange relationship with, but ultimately I quite like it. There are different decks for different readings too, so I personally like to change decks after a while. I only read for a few friends but they nearly always choose the Gilded (if I give them a choice ;)).

jayde	07 May 2005
Interestingly, I had Thoth before Haindl, and I had the same problem. I just couldn't connect to it. In fact, it gave me a strange feeling. When I first saw it, I simply said, "Oh, nice art." I learnt my lesson after that! I take much greater pains in selecting a deck now. Right now, I'm thinking of purchasing the Light & Shadows tarot deck. Which is definitely different; before I couldn't stand black & white decks. But, when I was looking at it on the website, I couldn't get the images out of my head.

pie eyed piper	07 May 2005
Hi Jayde, I owned my first deck for 8 years, which i really enjoyed, they were like my second skin. About 5 years ago, i picked up a new deck, but hated the feel of the cards. I couldn't get into the image and my reading were always way off kilter because i didn't have a bond even though i "broke" them in accordingly. Recently took my 8 year old deck out of the house for a reading for a co-worker and left them at work for a week. I had no desire to pick them up again because i'm sure EVERYONE was touching them and oddly, it felt invasive. Bought a new deck and feel wonderful, comfortable, confident and i am getting better readings than ever before. When in doubt, throw them out!

jayde	15 May 2005
Good advice. :) In the end, I had to put them aside. They just *felt* wrong, which was sad. They've been with me for a while.

Emily	15 May 2005
Hi jayde, Maybe you've just moved on and the deck hasn't moved with you. After you've had experience with other decks you might find you will eventually be able to work with the Haindl again - if the deck still attracts you. :)

The Lost connection thread was originally posted on 07 May 2005 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.