Addiction to Tarot

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 02 Jun 2005, and now archived in the Forum Library.

closrapexa	02 Jun 2005
No, not an adiction to Aeclectic, which is something I am proudly guilty of, but to Tarot itself. A cousin of mine recently started studying Tarot, and in a few months only she has gotten really good at it, and I can already that she will be a GREAT reader. however, when I saw her last night I got the impression that she was looking for the wrong things in the wrong places. She is reading for herself, about the same questions over and over again. The issues and questions that the cards hand her are never thought or considered all the way through, she, by her own admossion, reads again and again until she understands what was said. She then forgets the reading and reads again. Is she addicted to Tarot? Were you are do you know anyone that could be addicted? Or am I all wrong and I am the one who is taking things too seriously? Thats a possibility, of course. What do you think?

rainwolf	02 Jun 2005
I think this is something everyone faces when they start to some degree. Unless she is easy to talk to, think for herself, and compromise, learning from experience is one of the only ways she can learn. You can try to talk to her about it, saying that if you keep asking the answer wont change. For some people, this will help them; for others they will keep going. Maybe if you tell her to start a journal to write down her thoughts from the spread she can study her readings. I don't see many solutions to this because it is based on the persons mentality that "it will change some time" when really the cards will either say the same thing, or just give you gibberish. I hope she finds the easy way though.

Asenath	02 Jun 2005
Or maybe you can direct her to this site and she can start helping other people with their readings.

Alta	02 Jun 2005
I think she is trapped in too small a circle and going round and round. She really does need to read for others either in person or online (i.e. here). If all or most of what you read about is yourself, it becomes obsessive. Als, the idea of trying to get her to journal the readings and work out the card meanings slowly over time will help with the mulitple readings.

Baby Owl	02 Jun 2005
If your cousin is doing this because she wants to practice but doesn't have enough people asking for readings, maybe she could read for "fictional" clients or characters in books or on television. She could make up questions for them.

MercyMe	02 Jun 2005
I used to do this and, given my state of mind sometimes, I can still do this with some issue that is pressing on me. I tend to be a rather compulsive thinker anyway, so I'm no different with tarot. However, I agree with the other posts here which suggest she begin reading for others. When I started doing the reading exchanges here it helped so much to not only sharpen my skills as a reader but it also helped to get me out of that compulsive loop. ~Mercy

HearthCricket	02 Jun 2005
I agree with what others have said. She has narrowed her tarot world down to just herself and needs to expand her horizons by reading to others. Reading for yourself or "pretend" clients is a fine way to practice. But it is limited. Getting out and reading for others is the most challenging thing of all, and it is in this practice that she will truly start to connect with tarot. Also, if she keeps asking the same question and keeps reading the cards over and over again, until she gets the answer she wants, she is missing out on the purpose of tarot, altogether. She needs to "listen" to the cards, and let them speak, read the whole of the spread and listen to the story it reveals. It may not be want she wants to hear. It often may seem vague, or far off the mark, because certain things have not come into play, yet. But if one tries to manipulate the cards, they won't be truthful and utter chaos will arise!

tao51	02 Jun 2005
She needs to widen her interests. Perhaps, joining the AT boards may help. The Tarot can become like a cave with twists and turns. It can continue to draw a person into questioning each turn. The quest becomes stronger. I feel she needs to have someone read for her. Objectivity is sometimes lost when a person is centered on their own self.

WalesWoman	02 Jun 2005
Your cousin may not be so much addicted as obsessed... with getting the Tarot to give her the answer she wants. I know I was when I first started reading, it was like falling in love, eat, sleep, breathing Tarot, totally preoccupied and possessed... which sort of freaked me out, but not so badly that I stopped. I think we want to know everything and understand and want to know it yesterday. Which is something I'm betting most of us are guilty of, pretending we aren't asking the same question over and over by changing the wording or the slant or whatever... even going as far as creating spreads to change the outcome of a previous spread. Ask her to write down her readings, positional meanings, the layouts and her thoughts... that way she won't have to do another spread when she forgets, but lay it out again and see what new insights she may get from it.

Hermina	02 Jun 2005
Of course Tarot is addictive. We are addicted to everything we enjoy doing. I agree, it sounds like she has more of a compulsion, or obsession. I was like that at first too. Everyone has to take their own journey with tarot. The only thing you can really do is suggest a journal. Writing down and interpreting each spread curbs the compulsion. It worked for me. I get so exhausted after I've interpreted just one spread for myself. I would be careful how to go about suggesting a journal as well in this situation. (Or anything for that matter.) I would say, "You know what I found really worked for me? I found journaling helped me interpret......." Then I would leave it alone. It's up to her from that point on. Hope this helped! -H

MeeWah	02 Jun 2005
Closrapexa: I see your concern as valid. The obsessed do not respond well to reason, however, due to a self-focus that prevents detachment. Perhaps encouragement to read for others in order to broaden the reading experience & the skills. Activities where interaction with others removes the attention from the self & can contribute to an appropriate & healthier perspective.

autumn star	02 Jun 2005
Sometimes when I have something on my mind, I will tend to overdo the amount of spreads that I do, and like your cousin, not take the time to really think about each spread, because I am searching for an answer. Perhaps doing readings for others would help her, for me, I somehow learned the self control to stop doing that because I just realised that I was getting nowhere at all. I think that the best thing if you don't understand a spread that you have done for yourself is to write it down and think about for a few days, and then you gain some objectivity and can think about it afresh:) For me I don't think that it was such an obsession with tarot but an obsession to find an answer that I was looking for. I am a worrier - I just have to know why and how come about everything - I just can't handle not to know something, it might sound strange, but that's just me, my mind works overtime :)

Ace	02 Jun 2005
closrapexa wrote: No, not an adiction to Aeclectic, which is something I am proudly guilty of, but to Tarot itself. A cousin of mine recently started studying Tarot, and in a few months only she has gotten really good at it, and I can already that she will be a GREAT reader. however, when I saw her last night I got the impression that she was looking for the wrong things in the wrong places. She is reading for herself, about the same questions over and over again. The issues and questions that the cards hand her are never thought or considered all the way through, she, by her own admossion, reads again and again until she understands what was said. She then forgets the reading and reads again. Is she addicted to Tarot? Were you are do you know anyone that could be addicted? Or am I all wrong and I am the one who is taking things too seriously? Thats a possibility, of course. What do you think? It could also be that she is unhappy about a situtation and looking for a better answer in the cards. but there is no better answer because the cards only tell you what is, not what you want to be true. So she can't accept the truth and keeps asking for new information or a different and better answer, and she can't get it. See if you can help her accept the reality of her situation or get her into counselling if she can't. Ace

Lady Maria	02 Jun 2005
autumn star wrote: For me I don't think that it was such an obsession with tarot but an obsession to find an answer that I was looking for. I must admit I've done that myself. With an unwanted outcome card, I've had the impulse to pick another "Clarifying" card (really just hoping for something better), which points to the same thing. I've learned to just accept the cards and focus more on the guidance or advice cards in the spread. I agree with autumn stars' advice about writing it down and taking a few days to mull it over, or take some action to change it. I've decided not to repeat a question untill I truly feel like I've done some work to change the situation. Love & Light, Maria

SunChariot	03 Jun 2005
closrapexa wrote: No, not an adiction to Aeclectic, which is something I am proudly guilty of, but to Tarot itself. A cousin of mine recently started studying Tarot, and in a few months only she has gotten really good at it, and I can already that she will be a GREAT reader. however, when I saw her last night I got the impression that she was looking for the wrong things in the wrong places. She is reading for herself, about the same questions over and over again. The issues and questions that the cards hand her are never thought or considered all the way through, she, by her own admossion, reads again and again until she understands what was said. She then forgets the reading and reads again. Is she addicted to Tarot? Were you are do you know anyone that could be addicted? Or am I all wrong and I am the one who is taking things too seriously? Thats a possibility, of course. What do you think? Don't know if you are taking things too seriously:-), but Tarot is a very spiritual tool. And as with most spiritual things sometimes one has to find their own path of what feels right for them and what feels wrong. You can always advice her of what you have learnt, but the rest is up to her. What I see as happening here, and I may be right and I may be wrong....is that of course there are two parts to any Tarot reading. First you get the advice, then you need to take it, put it into practice in your real life. Now that involves change, changing yourself and changing your life. And a whole lot of people, if not most people, are afraid of change. To think the reading all the way through would mean to throughly understand its meaning. If you thoroughly understood the message, you would see why what you are doing may need changing... Maybe she senses her readings asking her to change, but she may not be ready (have the courage yet) to take the next step, yet so she keeps going back over the same steps. Kindof stalling in neutral, as it were. I am sure she will get there when she is ready. We all arrive where we need to at our own pace. Personally, I think it is more of an unreadyness (so far) to go onto the next step than an addiction. All this being said, I have to admit I have done some of this on occasion too, preferring to do more readings that attempt the changes that were suggested. I wonder how many of us have done this sometimes(?) Bar

SunChariot	03 Jun 2005
autumn star wrote: For me I don't think that it was such an obsession with tarot but an obsession to find an answer that I was looking for. same here, I've done that often enough too. And I did A LOT of that when I was just starting to learn. Bar

Emeraldgirl	03 Jun 2005
When I was just starting tolearn aside from my teacher who I moved away from soon after we started I had no one really to practice on. I had just started high school in a new are so everyone else had gone to primary school together and I new no one caused we'd just moved not the best time to start going up to strangers and asking if they wanted a reading (not at the school I was at anyway) so I did a lot of readings for myself for my dad (bless his heart he's always so supportive) and even the family until I made some friends who I could open up to it took a while though. Maybe your cousin just needs more people to be available to read for. Direct her here and I'm sure she'll love it. If not then as others have said maybe she is looking for an answer she's not going to find and needs a wake up call about it.

The Addiction to Tarot thread was originally posted on 02 Jun 2005 in the Talking Tarot board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Talking Tarot, or read more archived threads.