How to deal with WANTING...

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 22 Jul 2002, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Jenny-Li	22 Jul 2002
This is an odd question perhaps, but it's one that's on my mind right now, and I thought I'd ask about. I'm not sure how to phrase it, so I hope you'll all se my point - it's in here, somewhere... When you really want something, and it's not up to you whether it will be like you want it too or not, how do you handle it?? In my case it's this job (again...!) that is perfect for me right now. It's a bit of what I do now, and a bit of what I'm trained to do, but don't get to do where I work now (and miss doing terribly...). I wrote a great application, my boyfriend and I checked and double checked and triple checked it over and over again, so it should be OK. There. I've done all I can, it's just OUT of my hands... And the waiting is killing me already. You probably know what it's like, it won't leave you alone, and you don't want to get your hopes up and you don't want to be overly pessimistic, and in the middle of everything you come to think of the part in Conversations with God, where it says that we create a state of WANT by focusing on what we don't have and on wanting that which we don't have - and that's when it get's really complicated...! So. What are you're habits in situations like these? Any tips, hints, ideas, words of wisdom, rituals, thoughts, advice... Pleeeease help me lift this ghost off my brain...! :D Thanks a lot! Light and love, Jenny :) PS: Oh and every reading I've made lately, everything I've meditated upon, thought about, it all point to the fact that I need to move on, change things, go to where I can grow and not just "hang around". That is even more stressful in this situation, because it leaves it all up to me, but in the end it's all up to the people reading those papers I sent...! How I hate not being in control! Why do I feel like a walking talking reversed Chariot...! :D

Marion	22 Jul 2002
This is not going to be a very spiritual answer. If I cannot stand it, I go to the movies. A lot. Once I went to five movies in one weekend. Then when life re-normalizes, so does my movie going. It is fun, not too expensive and takes your thoughts elsewhere.

Jenny-Li	22 Jul 2002
:D Well I didn't say it had to be spiritual did I...?! It's a good tip - only here movies are kind of expensive, so I can't go really wild and go through the whole repertoire...! But a couple might do me good... hm... Thanks for the tip! Jenny :D

Umbrae	22 Jul 2002
Hey there, how is your friend? How does he feel about the ‘change’ (I do believe he is excited)? I am a tad different than most. When I get bored, I change. It is scary as all-get-out sometimes, but it always works out for the best (long-term). There have been times I have left a comfortable job to go to a terrible job, but the second job has always worked as a spring-board for something better (which is where I wanted to be in the first place). Hmmmmm. Thank you, I think I just answered a question for myself. You Swedish girls always do that?

mermaiden	22 Jul 2002
Well, I try to get my mind off of wanting by busying myself w/other things (ie. the internet, a book, etc.). I don't know if that helps you but if you like doing something (ie. a hobby) try to invest more time in learning more about things you like or doing a favourite activity.

Jenny-Li	22 Jul 2002
Quote: Originally posted by Umbrae Hey there, how is your friend? How does he feel about the ‘change’ (I do believe he is excited)? Guess so, he's probably been giving me most of the hints I mentioned - and there have been a vast number of them! Only now it makes me more impatient than excited...! [/b][/quote] I am a tad different than most. When I get bored, I change. It is scary as all-get-out sometimes, but it always works out for the best (long-term). There have been times I have left a comfortable job to go to a terrible job, but the second job has always worked as a spring-board for something better (which is where I wanted to be in the first place).[/b][/quote] Yes? Hm, I think I'm too chicken to do that. So many people with my kind of education get laid off these days, and many that were laid off looooong ago have stayed unemployed... The market place just isn't what it used to be, being competent and ambitious and a good colleague just isn't enough anymore. But if the alternative is rotting in a destructive environment - then I'd go in a second! :D [/b][/quote]Hmmmmm. Thank you, I think I just answered a question for myself. Yu Swedish girls always do that? [/b][/quote] You bet! All the time! :D Thanks! Jenny :)

purplelady	22 Jul 2002
Well Jenny-Li, I don't have any great words of wisdom or advice. But I do have empathy because I can totally empathise with your plight! I'm also job applying. Oh, how I hate it! I also hate when important things are out of my control. It seems to be even more frustrating anymore. I've been rolling around the idea of having my own business more and more. I know the problums would be different than working for someone else. But at least I would feel totally in control. I don't know what to do anymore...................... Interesting you would mention " conversations with god". I Love those books . I just got done reading "communion with god" the 5 th one in the series I think. You are not even supposed to NEED anything in that book! (Don't want Or need anything!) It struck me as a little buddhist (or is it hindu?) at the end. It made a lot of sense while I was reading it but........................then it's back to real life. I DO understand it in principle though. I would like to discuss these books more , but don't know if many people here have actually read them. Back to your original question, sometimes you do have to relinquish control and just let it out into the universe and trust for the right outcome. Know when to force control, and know when to just let it go. Maybe That is the wise answer?! If I tried to control everything that I really wanted to control but could not , I Would drive myself crazy, and I'm already half-way there! "Don't sweat the small stuff" ! And everything is small stuff!" that is actually a title to one of those books! I haven't actually read one of those books! But occasionally someone will throw that saying at me. Is "everything" really small stuff? How come some people flip out at the first hint that they aren't totally in control of everything? And others take EveryThing in stride and nothing seems to bother them?

floracove	22 Jul 2002
When I am upset or nervous, I pick up a good Horror Story and become absorbed in it...

Umbrae	22 Jul 2002
Quote: Originally posted by Jenny-Li Yes? Hm, I think I'm too chicken to do that. So many people with my kind of education get laid off these days, and many that were laid off looooong ago have stayed unemployed... Education? I have never let that stand in my way. I am surrounded by folks with degrees,. They come to me for advice and answers. I have a high school dipoloma. Chicken? Think on this. How can you be afraid of the unkown? It is not known! How can you be afraid of that which you do not know? It's change that's scary...but hold on...the future, is already in progress...

Mermaid	22 Jul 2002
Hi Jenny! I don't know how much this will help, but when I really really want something and I've done all I can do to get it, I'll pick a night to cast a circle and ask Goddess for it (if she wants to give it to me!) or cast a spell about it, or both. And then once that's done, I find it heaps easier to put the issue out of my head. If I do find myself fretting about it again, I tell myself that I've done all I can because the universe/Goddess knows about it, and what I need to do right now is relax, sit back and wait for them to sort it out! Good luck for the job! (edited to correct my typing... I originally typed "I cast a smell about it" *giggle* I don't how much good that would do, - probably better avoid that form of stress release. :D)

truthsayer	22 Jul 2002
i try to remember these words of wisdom every time i start thinking things are bad or i don't like the way things are going: swallow a live frog every morning. nothing worse will happen to you all day. ;) :D it is very difficult for me to forget wanting something. (perhaps why i have over 70 tarot decks.) it seems that the back of my mind is always being tickled by it like a fishhook w/ a worm. sometimes i take the bait, sometimes i don't. to get my mind off it i do housework, go net surfing, read an exciting book, exercise, play w/ my pets. it seems that energy expenditure helps release the build up of anxiety that gets those wanting thoughts nagging at me. when i release that anxiety thru working hard or exercising then i can relax that feeling to a tolerable level.

oriel	22 Jul 2002
when the situation is out of my hands for the time being (like if i have to wait for any reason), the only thing that can make me feel better is going to the beach and getting in the water! i also cry a lot. and play the piano. mariel

The How to deal with WANTING... thread was originally posted on 22 Jul 2002 in the Chat board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Chat, or read more archived threads.