~ If your friend wanted a terrible tattoo...

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 08 Sep 2002, and now archived in the Forum Library.

kayne	08 Sep 2002
As you know... *very soon* I am about to get 'inked' with the tattoo I designed and posted here. Well, my best friend wants to get a tattoo as well, at the same time as me, and my room mate and I designed the tattoo for him. But it is terrible! The design is of a woman, naked (he wanted the breasts bigger...) with a snake wrapped around her to combine the fact that he is a Virgo born in the year of the Snake. Cool idea... but the tattoo we designed is awful!!! However he likes it and wants to get it... Today I spent most of the day designing another one, still pretty tacky but better, but he likes the first one best. So! My question is - should I tell him that I think it is awful or let him get the tattoo because - hey, it's his body, he can do what he wants with it? Or should I keep designing new tattoos in the hope that he will like these better? What would you do?

RedWood	08 Sep 2002
I would say..it is your choice..but since I am your friend..I really do not like that tattoo..and then present him with a few more ideas..see if he takes to it..then maybe he will be like sure..design more..or hey thats your opinion i am still getting...I would hate for you to slip up later saying you didnt like it and he is like WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME BEFORE I GOT IT DONE!...I would definately say something..he is your friend..friends do that..

purplelady	08 Sep 2002
personally, I don't like Any tatoos! Although I admit, some are much nicer than others. The knight of wands you have there is pretty cool looking. But if you don't want to see your friend get the tatoo you described, by all means tell him so! At least you'll have given your opinion. One of my main problums with tatoos is that I always wonder if the person will still just love that tatoo that is permanently on their body 10 or 20 years from now? Personally I would feel tired of AnyThing I tatooed on my body in so many years.

wavebreaker	08 Sep 2002
I agree with RedWood. It's not like a haircut that can be changed again later, a tattoo is forever... So I would be honest with your friend and say that you don't really like the design and ask him whether he's sure about it. Of course, if he still wants it, that's his choice, but at least you've given him your opinion, as a friend.

truthsayer	08 Sep 2002
i would tell him that i didn't like the design and i was very uncomfortable w/ the idea of him putting on a permanent tatoo that i didn't think was my best. then i would encourage him to wait until you both agree on a design being satisfactory. if you come across assertively then you might be able to avoid coming back to you in the future saying,"if you didn't like this design, why did you let me get it?" when someone changes their mind about something, the blame usually goes back to the designer. i wouldn't want to feel responsible in a situation like this for that reason.

Laurel	08 Sep 2002
Tell him that you think the original design is awful and tacky and you want him to reconsider. Then if he still insists, oh well. You can laugh about it with him a couple years down the road. Laurel

Alissa	08 Sep 2002
Do you think your friend would be temporarily satisfied to "test drive" the tattoo by getting it done in henna first? Henna tattoo last 7-10 days, but many of my clients like to try an idea out in henna before setting it in ink. Check my business site for more information on henna, how it works, and what to expect, espcially if you're not very familiar with it. http://alissa.sphosting.com This may give him a chance to see it on his body, and deicde whether he REALLY REALLY wants it forever and ever.

Alissa	08 Sep 2002
oh p.s. I forgot to mention that if you need any assistance looking for a nearby henna artist in your area, I can help you find a good, reputable artist. And AVOID "BLACK HENNA" products at ALL COSTS. (sorry for all the caps, but "black henna" can cause serious chemical burns which can scar your body for life, and build up toxins in the liver.) It's horrible stuff and as a artist who only works with natural henna, i detest what this chemical crap is doing to the good reputaiton of natural henna.

jade	08 Sep 2002
i agree with redwood. you need to be honest and THEN let him make his own decision. but at least that way you won't feel guilty about it.........and he can't get upset with you later if he also decided he hates it. love jade

WolfSpirit	08 Sep 2002
I would let him know I don't like the tattoo he wants...but I would add that this is my personal opinion and in the end it's up to him of course.

VGimlet	08 Sep 2002
I would tell him you are unhappy with the design, and want to come up with one *both* of you like. I agree, be honest. A tattoo is (virtually) forever. If he decides he really wants it there isn't much you can do.

Violet Gargoyle	08 Sep 2002
I think you have already put out your opinion by doing a redeux of the tattoo design that he wanted and it seems like your friend prefers the former. You could also try one more shot on re-doing the pic, say something like, if there was anything he would want improved on the design, what would he want. If he still prefers the first design, then you have already made it known your opinion (that you think it could be done better) and he established that his tastes run differently. There wouldnt be more that you can do without causing a tiff....

DarkElectric	08 Sep 2002
Hi Kayne! I think I would tell him that he really might want to think it over before getting it done, because, what happens later is anybody's guess. I mean, what if he meets someone he really likes a lot, she totally hates his tat, because she thinks it makes him look like some kind of playa, and hassles him about it no end! Or, better yet here's a sad but true story. I have a friend who was all psyched about getting a tat on her stomach. She insisted on getting a multi coloured butterfly. A medium sized one. She loved it. Two years later, she got pregnant. Her tummy got huge, and after she had the kid, the butterfly looked more like a misshapen Godawful ugly, garish bedspread. Your friend may want to consider, that as he gets older, his skin will change. So will 'She'. The snake wrapped babe of today may be the weird looking two headed blob of tomorrow!

RedWood	08 Sep 2002
lol at the blob of tomorrow..isnt that the truth...On her stomach? wow..that i am impressed with...

divinerguy	08 Sep 2002
How are you being harmed by his tattoo? The easy answer is, you're not. If your opinion is sought, then I believe you're free to voice your opinion. Otherwise, I think you're crossing the line.

RedWood	08 Sep 2002
hmmm DivinerGuy...as a friend..i would not consider it crossing teh line to say hey i dont like it...I think for me that is what friends do....it would be crossing the line if it was a stranger..or an aquaintence...for me anyway..

kayne	09 Sep 2002
Quote: Originally posted by divinerguy How are you being harmed by his tattoo? You're right, I am not being harmed by the tattoo, but the fact that I was involved in the design of it makes me feel a little responsible. Also, like I said, he is a good friend... I think I will go with DarkElectric's line of reasoning... "Could this tattoo make you look kinda sleezy?" and continue some different designs to present as options...

Bella	09 Sep 2002
Sounds familiar. My stepson got a tattoo (didn't tell anyone beforehand) of a barebreasted (big!!) woman as the main part of the design. It is really tacky, and all the women in his life gave him h*ll for it, and he always has to keep his arm covered when he's with his little sister (my daughter). Now he wants to add flowers or something to make her a little more...um...modest. I think it's fine to tell your friend that you don't like it--in the end, he'll do what he wants anyway.

The ~ If your friend wanted a terrible tattoo... thread was originally posted on 08 Sep 2002 in the Chat board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Chat, or read more archived threads.