Tempted by the fruit of another...

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 15 Jul 2002, and now archived in the Forum Library.

PurpleGoddess	15 Jul 2002
This is probably coming from my Christian roots but i'm also aware of the power of the universe in matters of the heart. I just found out this weekend while working a wedding reception that a young man i've been involved with is married! :-( Someone told me that she thought he was but she's known for not telling the truth either. I'm now afraid that the Universe will have bad things happen to any future relationships. I need to cleanse my heart, body and soul of this man and his advances, problem is that I see him often at my p/t job and w/it comes being sociable. I need to place that distance between us to say no more and let it just be me being me at work. I would like to find out if there are any rituals that I can do for the Goddess to clear the air so to speak and ask for forgiveness. I do feel remorse because I don't like being the person in a married triangle. When I found out, i went onto the beach where the reception was being held and said i didn't know and i was sorry. that i will not let anything happen between us again. no matter what he says about his marriage. I'm not beating myself up. I've accepted the fact that he had the wool pulled over my eyes but I see clearly now. And able to move on to more important people in my life. Thank you for listening all and your support will be so appreciated. I hate doing things that go against the moral fiber I try to live my life by. Peace and Blessed Be's! :TQC :THP

Diana	15 Jul 2002
PurpleGoddess: Now I am just thinking "what would my very wise mother have said to you in such an unfortunate situation?". She would have said "I don't believe you are not beating yourself up. Your words betray you. So the first thing you must do is to love yourself, absolutely, and entirely". Then she would also have said "You must have no more dealings with this person. If you cannot avoid seeing him, you are to treat him as a stranger - polite if needs be, but any friendship is out." And what would I like to tell you? I would like to tell you that the Universe is not out to get you, but here to help you through your life's journey. How about a bit more trust in the Powers that Are? The Universe has no need to "forgive" you, for you are so LOVED by It. Will you just please accept that you are human, and that you made a mistake? A bit of compassion for yourself, and then you'll see - you'll realise that all this business has helped you grow and understand yourself, and others. It was a good idea to go to the beach. The waves have already carried your wishes away and cleansed them with their salt. Don't feel bad. PLEASE????

jade	15 Jul 2002
you did nothing wrong. you were unaware and as you have said, you wouldn't have done anything if you knew. so................please remember that it's his karma to work out not yours. i don't see you as having to do anything other than what you've done. apologize to your guides/higher power/goddess/whoever and to not let anything happen again. i am like you. i would stop if i found that out too. good for you!!!! *jade patting you on the back* and i don't think it's going to hurt your future relationships, i think it's going to make you more aware and cautious! which are good things. :D in light, jade :D

Dark Inquisitor	15 Jul 2002
Poor Baby ! You are so lucky to get out now before you waste any more time on this crud. You have done the right thing, and you can celebrate the fact that you have enough self-regard to put yourself first. I understand your feeling the need for cleansing rituals, etc. (Coming into contact with the bad behaviors of others is very detrimental to me also. ) When you have to see him, you might try visualizing a brick wall surrounding you. I think you should be spoiling yourself rotten for at least a week - reinforce cherishing your own energy. Vigorous exercise can help ventilate your system. Write all your bad feelings on the matter down in a journal and then rip it up. Visualize unhooking & cutting all the psychic ties between you. Visualize shrinking him to doll house size- maybe even until he disappears. Sooner or later, the universe will even things up. Ask the universe to choose the right man for you, and let the matter rest. Ask also that all less than honest people be guided out of your life. Sympathysympathysympathy, Tarotphelia

Starfish	15 Jul 2002
Quote: Originally posted by Tarotphelia I think you should be spoiling yourself rotten for at least a week - reinforce cherishing your own energy. Vigorous exercise can help ventilate your system. Write all your bad feelings on the matter down in a journal and then rip it up. Visualize unhooking & cutting all the psychic ties between you. Visualize shrinking him to doll house size- maybe even until he disappears. I agree with everything stated already! And I especially love this snippet from Tarotphelia's post. ;) It is his karma that will be affected, not yours! Give yourself a big squeeze from me; forgive yourself (you were in the dark about his situation) and move forward! :T3C Starfish

PurpleGoddess	15 Jul 2002
thanks for the hugs and the pats on the back. i needed to hear and feel the energy through all the postings so far. and i am spoiling myself. called in sick cause i really am but i usually go in anyway. i plan on now just really loving myself and believe in the Higher Powers that i will be ok and they will place the right man for me into my life. i have trouble letting go though..i hold onto alot of things that need to be let go of... this is a healing time for me..was involved w/a couple of married men a long time ago of my own free will but that was before i started living a more solid spiritual life...the line "to harm none" rings in my ears and now i fear the worse...i do need to be gentler to myself and stop beating myself up. i'm only human and have much to learn and share along my path. i'm becoming more aware of the energy that enters into my life through this forum and people that enter my life. i just need to keep the filters up for those w/bad karma and dishonest intentions. i'm learning that slowly...life is school everyday. peace and light, thank you for your love and support. :* :TQC :THP

Jimilyn	15 Jul 2002
PurpleGoddess, Please do not dwell on the phrase "to harm none" in this instance. Your intentions were good, his were not. I would tend to believe that *he's* the one who should be expecting to be careful and not you. I don't believe that you have any reason to fear the worst, especially since you have put a stop to it as soon as you found out. Be more gentle with yourself. Hugs, Jimilyn

the hermit	16 Jul 2002
Quote: Originally posted by Jimilyn PurpleGoddess, Please do not dwell on the phrase "to harm none" in this instance. Your intentions were good, his were not. Good call from everyone! PurpleGoddess-- If you still want to cleanse yourself AND pamper... Take a nice hot bath in your favorite bubblebath, scented oil, whatever... Light some scented candles in the bathroom, maybe sip a little wine, enjoy, relax and (please, for once I really am trying to be serious here... really!) wash that man right out of your hair! While doing all of the above, continue to think about you... what a wonderful person YOU are... and when you feel all nice and warm and clean... step out of that bath with the realization that you are a good person who has harmed none!

Butterfly	16 Jul 2002
Purple Goddess. You say that in the past you have voluntarily been involved with married men. Maybe this is the divine, showing you just how far you have come spiritually. Look at the progress you've obviously made in those years to have the strength and wisdom to say no. Thank the divine for this reminder of your growth and be proud of who you now are!

PurpleGoddess	16 Jul 2002
I know that I'm beating myself up and that it was his responsiblity to give me essential information, like being married. So Hermit, got a cold in the meantime so pampering myself is number 1 priority. Have the perfect bubble bath stuff to help me clean this guy right out of my hair. The phone is getting turned off tonight while i savor being in the tub w/candles, white wine and my cat playing with my toes...she loves it when i'm in the tub. I will use my inner eye to see his presence washed off me and watch him go down the drain. Butterfly, thank you for the reminder that i have come a long way baby!!!! i've learned my lessons well and i know what i'm looking for, he presented himself falsely and i can't take the rap for this one. Jimilyn, you're right too. i didn't intentionally harm anyone (his wife) because i didn't know he had one. so as Hermit and everyone so far has said..i've grown and will treat myself extra special for the next week or so. i think i might go clothes shopping..something to relfect the true Goddess in me..it's been a couple of weeks. Peace and Love, :TQC

truthsayer	16 Jul 2002
((((((((((((((((((purplegoddess))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))really sorry this happened to you. things that i do when i'm trying to cleanse someone out of my life: 1. use aromatherapy w/ a pure oil like lavendar to strengthen and heal my aura on a daily basis 2. i put out of sight or get rid of things that remind me of this person or this person gave me 3. particularly after an ended romance, i buy some new clothes!! 4. i write a letter to this person that i never send. then i do a ritual of burning the pages and releasing the feelings to the wind. i end it by clapping my hands and repeating, "you have no power over me!!!!!!!" then every time i run into this person or think about him i remember the ritual and remember my affirmation-you have no power over me! it helps put an emotional boundary via the image, words, and actions. 5. buy dove dark chocolate and ENJOY!!!!!!!!! 6. if i need to, hide under the covers for a little while. a nice cuddly stuffed animal is nice to hold at times like this or if your cat will cuddle that's even better. 7. listen to music that makes you feel stronger and/or more relaxed. music has strong curative powers. hope this helps some.

Bella	16 Jul 2002
how awful purplegoddess--i'm so sorry you feel bad. but as everyone has told you--it's not your fault at all!! may your heart and spirit heal quickly.

The Tempted by the fruit of another... thread was originally posted on 15 Jul 2002 in the Spirituality board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Spirituality, or read more archived threads.