Spiritual Awareness vis-a-vis suffering from difficult lessons

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 15 Aug 2002, and now archived in the Forum Library.

debins	15 Aug 2002
Just looking for some feedback, some wisdom, some ideas: It seems to me that the more spiritually aware I become the more easily damaged I become when I don't care for myself at the level I just learned about. Is this really so? It seems that for every book, lesson, experience, bit of sharing there is a consequence for not heeding the lesson that hits harder than if I were completely ignorant of things. What is your take on this? Namaste, Debins.

Umbrae	15 Aug 2002
My take is that it was happening anyway, you just were not aware of it. Lets say you just found out you own a really NICE car. But it's been sitting in the parking lot of a major chain food store for the last 3 years. It was getting dinged before, but now that you know you own it, you are really aware of every dent and scratch. But do you want to know something? If you try to 'shut off' the awareness...it gets worse. Welcome home.

zorya	15 Aug 2002
hmmm, maybe we're just more aware, or maybe the universe is trying to get our attention. first it whispers to us, then it taps on our shoulders, next it gives us a shove, if we continue to ignore our lesson it whacks us good, on the head. ..... or maybe it's just that we're more aware :D

debins	15 Aug 2002
about the car. No, I wasn't trying to shut off the awareness; I was just making a before and after comparison. By the way I like your postscript: quote: Never be in the company of anyone with whom you would not want to die./quote It actually answered a question-burden I've been carrying about a "lost" friend. And thanks, Zorya, too. I appreciate your feedback for I was wondering whether or not I was just more aware or whether something else was up, so to speak. Namaste, Debins.

Jenny-Li	16 Aug 2002
Hi! I think on the contrary, the more aware I get, the easier I find it to handle the hardships of everyday life. Well, not easier perhaps, but at least easier to handle, since I have a perspective of spiritual distance, I don't have to think that everything is such a big deal as I did before, when the everyday life was all I knew... But then I suppose we suddenly see our own part and responsibility in everything, whereas before we had the "luxury" of always being able to blame someone or something else. Even the traditional view of God can be interpreted as passivating, since all responsibility was placed in the hands of God. Or perhaps that's just my misinterpretation...? In any case, suddenly finding oneself responsible for oneself, is another awareness we need to learn to live with, and find a balance in. Light and love, Jenny :)

Mlle Lenormand	16 Aug 2002
I must be at the same stage as Debins. I was wondering the same thing too this last week. With me, the awareness gives me a better understanding, and I handle troubles in a calmer way. So therefore, being better prepared I am able to tackle harder lessons in life, or so my theory goes. So it makes sense that we are attracting what we need to attain growth doesn't it?

Moongold	16 Aug 2002
I'm curious to know what you mean by "spiritual awareneness". Is it faith in a Higher Power (God?), the sharing of love and understanding with others, or the way you live in your inner life? These things are not necessarily mutually exclusive and I guess any one of them could make you much more spiritually aware. I was just curious. Spiritual awareness has meant so many different things to me over the years. Once for three months I had a really keen awareness of every physical thing and every emotional nuance, and would dream music and laughter. Another time I was very sick and felt major despair but had a different kind of spiritual awareness. How do you maintain such awareness, too? Many questions....but very interesting.. Moongold

Laurel	16 Aug 2002
I'm sitting here amazed, because before Umbrae's post, I'd never looked at it in quite that way before but it makes perfect sense to me. And there's no turning back, except to go lose myself in escapism again, which leads to depression, which leads to suffering, which leads to a desire to escape suffering, which leads to self-contemplation, which leads to self-realization which leads to awareness... I think I'll break the cycle and stick to the little aches and pains of awareness. :) Laurel

Jenny-Li	16 Aug 2002
Quote: Originally posted by Moongold I'm curious to know what you mean by "spiritual awareneness". Moongold: For me spiritual awareness is about finding yourself in the universal order. It's a bit like drawing a map first so you can find the red dot that marks "You are here" on that very map....! It's all of the things you mentioned, and more. Hm... was that helpful or just more confusing...? ;) Light and love, Jenny :)

Moongold	16 Aug 2002
Quote: It seems to me that the more spiritually aware I become the more easily damaged I become when I don't care for myself at the level I just learned about. Is this really so? It seems that for every book, lesson, experience, bit of sharing there is a consequence for not heeding the lesson that hits harder than if I were completely ignorant of things. End of Quote These words stayed with me over night and I think I understand what you were saying now, Debins. Spiritual awareness for me is about inner life and knowledge which enables me to live differently (and more peacefully). That can show itself in how I perceive the world and act in it. I guess spiritual awarness is different for all of us, but before I had some degree of awareness my life was chaos. If I don't care for myself at that level, my life can easily return to that. It can be a gradual slide into depression and negativity or it could be something dramatic. Just by way of a practical example, it is really important for me to be 'connected' to other people, to have mutual friendships that sustain all of us in them. Knowing how important that is, if I let some misundertanding or distance develop, I end up feeling damaged in some way. If I 'lose my cool' and let it go, I am quite damaged in an immediate sense. Spiritual awareness is a dynamic thing. I have to grow spiritually. If I don't, I stagnate. I think there are highs and lows in awareness though. I recently had quite a long period of 'lowness' and but I think I learnt something fairly important from it - something about attachment to certain things in the world, what is important and what is not (for me). There is something about faith in all of this that is important as well but perhaps that belongs to another conversation. One of the things I did discover passing out of this time, is the Tarot and how this can be lens to things I didn't dream about before. It's fun as well. Just in a few months work with the Tarot, I get a very real sense of being connected to a spiritual world way beyond my understanding, but somehow reassuring and benign. Moongold

debins	16 Aug 2002
yes, inner life and knowledge is what I meant. That it's more dynamic than I had realized, I am finding out. I think I've got growing pains. At least, that's what I am surmising from all your answers. But no, I don't want to turn back. Yes, Jenny-Li--I think you've really latched onto something important here: quote: But then I suppose we suddenly see our own part and responsibility in everything, whereas before we had the "luxury" of always being able to blame someone or something else. Even the traditional view of God can be interpreted as passivating, since all responsibility was placed in the hands of God. /quote Your sharing really helps. Thanks so much, with love, Namaste, Debins.

The Spiritual Awareness vis-a-vis suffering from difficult lessons thread was originally posted on 15 Aug 2002 in the Spirituality board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Spirituality, or read more archived threads.