I feel confusied when it comes to my gift?

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 24 May 2003, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Menmay	24 May 2003
I was raised Catholic and about five years ago I began to read the tarot. Even thought I was raised catholic my family had nothing wrong with me being wiccen. Im hispanic and the use of spells and tarot is not unncommon in our culture. Well my fiance finally let me now that he was not comfortable with my choice in new beliefs. So I stoped everything except my tarot, and he was fine with that. Now to the present time I stared going to a Christain church ( Not the same as Catholic just for those who think they are the same) since thats what my fiance is. Since I have been going to this church I feel that I have grown so much spiritually. God (Jesus Christ) has changed the both of our lives for the best. Ive decided to change to the Christian faith since I love it so much but what to do about my tarot. I have a freind who is so gung ho Jesus and I have never told her about my talent with the cards. She belives that Satan is behind everything in that nature. But in my heart I know this is not true!!! I cant stop reading the tarot its a huge part of my soul. But I feel that I will never really belong to anything since its taboo in the bible..sigh. What do you all think I should do?

Two of Wands	24 May 2003
You do belong to something. You belong to the Christian faith and you belong to a body of people that enjoy working with the mythical images on Tarot cards. Neither one is wrong unless used for evil purposes, which both can be. I think you'll find that there will be people it would simply be best not to discuss Tarot with; and why should everyone know? I’m not saying hide it, I’m just saying don’t feel compelled to discuss it with those that you know are closed to it. There will always be people who don't like it you know, there will always be those who tell you that you can't be involved in one if you are involved in the other. But you know, the family of Christians and the family of Tarot enthusiasts are both too large to worry about those within them who try to cast you out or accuse you of not being true to one of the other. "I have a friend who is so gung ho Jesus and I have never told her about my talent with the cards. She believes that Satan is behind everything in that nature." Fine, keep this person as a friend, just don't entrust her with everything that you think and feel. Clearly she would be threatened by your interests. But that is her problem and not yours. She's been told Tarot is bad, and the easiest and safest thing for her to do is to believe that and not question it. Let that be her want, but don't let it affect you. It sounds to me that you enjoy the Christian faith and enjoy being a part of it. As long as you are not hurting others then I think you have every right to believe yourself a good Christian. Don't try to change yourself to match other people's rules. That's not what the faith is about, it's just what individuals within the faith are about. Enjoy being part of both, relish them and get the best out of them!

HOLMES	24 May 2003
in other words sit down by yourself and tell your jesus everything, and then ask to recieve his answers in your heart. you will feel what is right for you. clear your emotions and let the truth of yourself speak true. the tarot isnt' for everyone for their soul levels. some need the sancity of the church , whiles moved on past the heirophant stage seeking the truth while taking the teachings of the church or their spiritual teachers with them. it is clear you are torn between two worlds. and so i can only share of myself. i to give my life to christ for a day when i was 14. before i got into tarot and i felt what you do , yet i have felt that on my spiritual path afterwards. and i feel it sometimes when i read the tarot it is a feeling of love and light and that all will be ok. the tarot for me when i read it i use it to connect to the light, to the angels, to the guides, and the masters which for me is where the christ lies. to help our brother by this means isn't wrong for me, yet it is for you who must decide what is right for you to give up your beliefs for love is a strong sacfrice of your self and isnt' reccomended for you are cutting off a part of yourself that will feel lonely and will work to underdeminze your relationship in the long run. your financee must accept you as you are, he can not change you unless it is your wish to change for him for since time began stories has been about people changing for their lovers. "i will make a honest woman out of you , changes your ways or leave me " are you ready to make that step ? here i got my jungian tarot here i will lay down advice card for you for i am being vague i sense. while i was shuffling i was instructed to tell you to look at the devil card in the tarot and first look at all your book meanings for it, and then consider what that means for you . can such a archtype which means bondange, and attachment due to us giving to much power to things in our lives really affect us like they say "the devil gives you power it will cost your soul " your card was the chariot reversed. it is the title the all present father , reversed. (it means victory and triumph as key word as well but since it is reversed it means defeat and being conquered ) it means we are not alone, and since it is reversed, you are afraid of being alone, and see that if you continue you may be alone. on a deeper level it means you see yourself as being seperate from your higher power if you continue with the tarot and dont' give in, and so what it really means in context to your question, you are being influence by male energies that are telling you believe what i say, do as i say , for i will conquer you and make you mine. it is reversed though so it from ego , not postive ambition this is happening. know that the god you follow is one of love, not of judgment and can not help but love you regardless of your situation. there are christian alternatives such as the soul tiding truths cards or the angels tarot, or the angel oracles. be well :O)

HudsonGray	24 May 2003
There's been another thread recently about tarot & the christian religions--it's pretty much agreed across the board that tarot doesn't contradict any of the teachings of the religion and it's not evil based. Anyone telling you they're part of Satan isn't an informed person in what the deck is or how it connects to our subconscious and our spiritual side. They need an educated opinion before giving you that kind of advice, and the mere fact that they equate it with evil shows that they know nothing about tarot decks. Listen to your heart and instincts. Stand by your convictions. Don't 'change' unless it's something desired by you--or you'll end up stressed and frustrated. Marriage is compromise, but who you are inside is YOU and not someone else's idea of themself. Here it is, I found the thread-- http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=14175

amyel	24 May 2003
Menmay, I'm not a christian, nor was I raised in the Christian faith. I think Two of Wands said it well: even as a non-christian, I don't share my beliefs with everyone. It is very personal for me; I don't feel the need to share it with everyone. Amy

Sobeknofret	25 May 2003
Sorry, but it sounds to me like you're being manipulated by the people closest to you, which strikes me as terribly sad and dangerous. My husband is not a Wiccan as I am, but he would *never* tell me to change my religious beliefs because he was uncomfortable with them, and nor should he. My beliefs are my own, and not his. My close friend is a very devout Mormon, but she would never dream of telling me that I need to give up something like tarot, because she doesn't read, or because she believes it's evil (actually, she asked me to read for her one time, so I don't really know what she thinks...). If you are comfortable being a Christian, then that's great, more power to you and lots of blessings, and it's not my intention to critisize what you truly believe in; I think that every one needs something to believe in, even if it's nothing, in the case of some folks. But for him to ask you to change what you believe because HE'S uncomfortable with it is a very manipulative and scary thing to do. What's he going to ask you to give up next? Your family because he's uncomfortable with them? Your friends? Your job? I gave up tarot and my religion for a lover one time. It was part of his way of isolating me so that I would be totally dependent on him and I wouldn't have anyone to tell when he finally began abusing me. I'm not saying that your fiance will become abusive, or that he is now, please understand; mine was an extreme situation. It's just my experience that when someone asks you to give up your beliefs and your talents for love or friendship, that it's a control mechanism which is never good. I think Holmes is absolutely right when he says "to give up your beliefs for love is a strong sacfrice of your self and isnt' reccomended for you are cutting off a part of yourself that will feel lonely and will work to underdeminze your relationship in the long run. your financee must accept you as you are, he can not change you unless it is your wish to change for him." BTW, there is a lovely Christian tarot deckout there called "Tarot of the Master," published by Lo Scarabeo. I saw it today for the first time, and I must say that I really like it enough to consider buying it. There's also a really nice "Tarot of the Saints" out there too, which is also a great deck.

Shadow Wolf	26 May 2003
You might also consider rethinking marrying this man. If he expects you to give up things that you strongly believe in, then how long will it be before he's controlling your every move. I'm also into tarot, and I've also done a few tarot spells and my husband is fine with it. Granted, we've been together for almost 20 years, but I would not give it up even if he wasn't o.k. with it. I feel too strongly about, and even though he teases me about it sometimes , he never tries to interfere or try to talk me out of my beliefs. He just says that he doesn't believe in it. Just something to think about. Just my 2 cents worth, hope I didn't offend you.

The I feel confusied when it comes to my gift? thread was originally posted on 24 May 2003 in the Spirituality board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Spirituality, or read more archived threads.