When you don't like the look of the throw(layout)

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 24 Jan 2005, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Phoenix Rising	24 Jan 2005
When you don't like the look of the cards you've dealt for a reading, online ones, like for members, what do you do? Do you do another one hoping for a better looking throw?, carry on with it, even though it might not tell a pretty picture? Or perhaps the throw doesn't make any sense? Tarot seems to have a graceful way of not being too harsh, or is it dependent on the reader? Now I only ask this because a couple of times, I've done this, just a couple not many. But I think it might just be the manner of the interpretation, it can seem a little harsh. Especially with cartomancy, it can be brutal and blunt. So I've had the dilemma of posting it or not. I feel a little embarassed having to admit this though! But the matter may not be as harsh as it seems too. So also trying to soften the blow so to speak. But I could also be dead wrong about the whole interpretation too. Have any of you faced this dilemma?

Fullmoonsinger	24 Jan 2005
What I do is-- I sweat over the results for a long time. Eventually it will make sense. The harsh readings are worse. I work hard trying to figure out how to present the message in a way that it could be heard rather than fought. I do have a tendency to bluntness. Sometimes I wish I used methods like the Opening of the Key spread that tell you if it's not a good time for a reading. (I think if the significator isn't in the appropriate string, you have to abandon the reading?) But I'm still working up to 78-card readings! MoonSinger

huredriel	24 Jan 2005
Well I normally read it, to be honest, but try to think of a way that it won't come across in an upsetting or hurtful manner. I haven't that much experience yet, but I feel it is dependent upon the reader as I know I have a tendency towards being blunt/harsh, even when I try not to, and I'm sure my cards aren't as blunt as me! x Huredriel

contradiction	24 Jan 2005
i agonize over giving bad news, whether in person, or online. but being the blunt, person i am i know of no other way, but to just say what i see. i know i personally, and the feedback i have gotten from others, most people would rather you tell them the truth, good or bad. i don't say "your wife will leave you", or anything like that i would try to phrase it something like "i see a problem in your relationship, you need to work on quickly", and then give the card(s) and my interpertation of it. if it just dosen't make sense, i will usually put them away for a while, and go back later. sometimes if you wait, awhile and go back the same throw will make sense. it depends on how you approach the cards, sometimes you can do it, sometimes you can't.

Thirteen	24 Jan 2005
Well, it all depends on how the cards feel. If it's an "uh-oh"--bad news read, and it's clear as clear that it's answering the question, only the answer ain't a happy one, well, then you give it to the querent straight and let them know that the future isn't set in stone. They now know the worst, so they can work out the best way to respond/handle it. If there's going to be an earthquake, get the breakables in a safe place and payout for earthquake insurance, yes? But *if* on the other hand the cards feel somehow wrong, if they don't make sense or answer the question, then that's a different story. I have to ask myself two things then: 1) Are they answering a different question? Sometimes the question asked by the querent isn't the one the cards want to answer--the querent asked about love, but the cards think it more important to tell the person about, say, their health or their career. So, I try to work out what the cards are really trying to tell the querent and, once again, give it to them straight. A lot of pentacle cards in a spread asking about Love might well be answering a different question--might be about health, not love. So that would be a clue that a different question is being answered. If this is the case, more often than not, the querent will say, "Oh, my gosh! I didn't want to say anything about that, but it's so dead on....!" And suddenly they'll change their piorities, etc. 2) Do the cards need cleansing and new shuffle. Sometimes, the cards are ALL wrong. Hey, it happens. And if you feel that strongly enough, you're probably right. Something else is influencing them and they need to be re-shuffled, maybe cleansed with a vision of white light. The layout should seem right for the person your'e reading for. Not "good" or "happy"--just like THEM. If it feels like it isn't them at all, then re-shuffle. Believe me, if that's the only answer to the question that the cards want to give, they'll give it again in another way. If it's the wrong answer completely for that person, a re-shuffle will show it--the new answer will feel right where the other felt wrong.

tarotbear	24 Jan 2005
Many, many years ago, before I ever picked up a Tarot deck, I remember this one experience where some of us went out to a bar and an acquaintance was doing readings on a table off to one side. A friend of mine went for a reading, and the reader got very upset. He started reading and finally said 'The cards are being too aggressive tonight,' and promptly ended her reading. The next morning her brother was found dead - he died in his sleep. **** Back to thread **** It is my experience that there is no such thing as a bad reading and that even when things don't make a damn bit of sense that you do the reading anyway. I have been in this situation, too, and find the best - if only- thing to do is explain each card to the Querent and tell them that they don't seem to fit together. Sometimes the querent sees things that we don't see, or that they haven't told us. Sometimes, if things don't fit, try using the reversed meaning for the cards and see what happens.

Phoenix Rising	24 Jan 2005
Thankyou all for your advices, I did ask a friend who's a reader 25 years, she says you tell it, if they're not meant to know it, it wouldn't come up. It's just being tactful. She's had woman come for readings and she can see straight away that the husband is having an affair. She'll say something like, "do you know, of the woman who's being a bad influence around your husband"or"there are some untruths at the moment" Now doesn't that sound better than "he's cheating, or lying" That's what I have to learn. Tact.

Pook	24 Jan 2005
I agree that tact is a very important part of tarot. I also think that if you are having a hard time reading the cards for somone, it never hurts to ask a question or two. Even if it is an online reading. No harm could come from turning the reading into a more interactive reading than you originally intended, except that you may be out a little more of your time.

Ace	25 Jan 2005
Phoenix Rising wrote: When you don't like the look of the cards you've dealt for a reading, online ones, like for members, what do you do? Do you do another one hoping for a better looking throw?, carry on with it, even though it might not tell a pretty picture? Or perhaps the throw doesn't make any sense? Tarot seems to have a graceful way of not being too harsh, or is it dependent on the reader? Now I only ask this because a couple of times, I've done this, just a couple not many. But I think it might just be the manner of the interpretation, it can seem a little harsh. Especially with cartomancy, it can be brutal and blunt. So I've had the dilemma of posting it or not. I feel a little embarassed having to admit this though! But the matter may not be as harsh as it seems too. So also trying to soften the blow so to speak. But I could also be dead wrong about the whole interpretation too. Have any of you faced this dilemma? I believe in dealing with the hand you are dealt. To say, that is not a good throw is to try to deny or escape a truth the cards are telling you. Some decks can be more blunt than others, but I used to use the RWS and people insisted that I was the most blunt talking reader they ever met. The WorldTree can also be blunt, Astra is a pretty blunt talker, so when I told some friends (psychics used to be very "airy fairy" about such things) they really freaked out at the blunt tone of the readings given. Basically: the truth is in the cards. If it doesn't make sense to YOU that is not important. If it doesn't make sense to the querent, then you might want to look it it closer.

firemaiden	25 Jan 2005
Phoenix Rising wrote: When you don't like the look of the cards you've dealt for a reading, online ones, like for members, what do you do? Do you do another one hoping for a better looking throw?, carry on with it, even though it might not tell a pretty picture? Or perhaps the throw doesn't make any sense?? Dear Phoenix Rising - on my first on-online reading, it was a relationship reading, I got some very negative cards for the relationship, and I ignored them, because I didn't believe them, and I was too scared to be so negative. So I just wrote about the good stuff. After the feedback came in, I realized that all the negative stuff was actually there, it would have been good to have expressed it, because it would have validated the person's pain. People like to have their current pain validated. However, I would still not feel comfortable making very negative future predictions. To Tarotbear's story -- YIKES!

tinkerbell	25 Jan 2005
well that happens to me a lot. not in the sense that the cards are "negative" but basically, i just can't work out their message. i admit, i'm still pretty new at all this so i try not to worry about it too much. however, having reached the required amount of posts to enter the reading exchange, i volunteered to do 2 readings. the first one was received well but the 2nd one was described as "a bit wide of the mark"- it didn't make any sense at all. the reason for that response was because the first spread didn't immediately make sense.........so after 5 minutes i gave out and threw down a completely new spread-(this was the one which i eventually posted and drew a complete blank!!!!) i learnt a very valuable lesson that day and since then, i have never and will never deviate from the first reading out, as that is the only one we're intended to interpret.of course, having done this, there's nothing wrong with then doing a different spread if you feel so inclined. as a result of my "mistake', i have a much deeper respect for the cards and so in a way, i'm glad it happened but to anyone else tempted ..........DON"T do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tink xxx

Stacie Doll	25 Jan 2005
Thirteen wrote: But *if* on the other hand the cards feel somehow wrong, if they don't make sense or answer the question, then that's a different story. I have to ask myself two things then: 1) Are they answering a different question? Sometimes the question asked by the querent isn't the one the cards want to answer--the querent asked about love, but the cards think it more important to tell the person about, say, their health or their career. So, I try to work out what the cards are really trying to tell the querent and, once again, give it to them straight. thanks for posting! i needed this advice.

Stacie Doll	25 Jan 2005
tinkerbell wrote: blank!!!!) i learnt a very valuable lesson that day and since then, i have never and will never deviate from the first reading out, as that is the only one we're intended to interpret.of course, having done this, there's nothing wrong with then doing a different spread if you feel so inclined. as a result of my "mistake', i have a much deeper respect for the cards and so in a way, i'm glad it happened but to anyone else tempted ..........DON"T do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tink xxx doing a second spread usually confuses me more. rarley does it bring clarity, in my experience.

Umbrae	25 Jan 2005
Zorya once said, “If we are too attached to a perceived outcome, we may miss opportunities, or what is truly meant for us.” If you don't like a spread, or if it give you the 'willies', or you don't understand it. Let it sit. Think about it. Meditate on it. Not all messages are going to be lovey dovey - sometimes we have to get a wake up call from the gods. But dont' pick up those cards...

Clau	25 Jan 2005
You can also say in all honesty to the querent: you know, the cards don't make sense to me right now, can I get back to you later about this? I have done it and it works. I too think the first spread is what it really is, sometimes the cards are scary, not what you want to hear or you just don't get what they are trying to say... Or..... you can ask dear Thirteen for help. (or anyone you respect fo that matter). Blessings, Clau

judylea1	26 Jan 2005
How often have you or I wished we had heard the truth instead of a whitewash, as unpleasant as it would have been at the time! Think of the pain it might save later. The truth should be delivered in as kind a way as possible. It is possible to offer the same message in very different ways. Perhaps the art of diplomacy should be considered.

Fudugazi	26 Jan 2005
I've also learnt the hard way that when Tarot wants to tell you something it will. Whether you or your querent understand it or want to hear it is another matter. Umbrae's right - if you are reading online or for yourself and the cards don't make sense, sit on them for a while. Leave them out until they speak to you. Ask other tarot readers for input, maybe. In live readings, then you can try asking questions, or saying things like - "this is strange, te cards appear to be saying that ...[whatever they appear to be saying]" or describe the cards and ask more questions. About bad news: this is a very difficult one to handle, and I'm not sure I've got it right - I tend to be too gentle. One thing you can do, however, is to ask for a card that will help the person get through the difficult period.

caridwen	28 Jan 2005
I find that the cards don't make sense if the querent or, myself for that matter, are not clear about the question. Sometimes a querent asks several questions at once but I always specify - only one question a spread - if you have another question, I will do another spread. If I am tired, worried or edgy - the cards give me mixed messages as though picking up several questions at once. In those cases I ask the querent to write the question down and shuffle and deal again. For myself, I write down the spread and cards and go back to them later.

The When you don't like the look of the throw(layout) thread was originally posted on 24 Jan 2005 in the Using Tarot Cards board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Using Tarot Cards, or read more archived threads.