Queen of Cupsness

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 30 Mar 2005, and now archived in the Forum Library.

Pipistrelle	30 Mar 2005
The court cards are often described in abstract: for example, the Queen of Cups is described as compassionate, intuitive, etc. This can sometimes make it difficult to relate to the courts. In the case of the Queen of Cups, if you wanted to acquire some of her qualities, some of her "Queen of Cupsness", how would you go about this? What would you do? How would you turn those abstract concepts into practical application? (To explain, two readings I have done recently have made me aware that I've "lost" some of my Queen of Cupsness and I should take steps to bring those qualities back into my life...I'm just not sure how. Without Tarot, I don't think I would have even been aware of this subtle shift within myself.) Pip P.S. I have totally no idea where this thread belongs - please move as you see fit!

Fulgour	30 Mar 2005
If you have a favourite book on astrology, check under the Moon in Cancer... this doesn't always work out the way you might think, especially when in different signs.

Pipistrelle	30 Mar 2005
Hi Fulgour - good idea, thanks :) I've just started getting interested in Astrology and am currently reading the Astrologer's Handbook. I'll take a look. Pip

firemaiden	30 Mar 2005
To develop more "queen of cupsness" in oneself... interesting question, since that is sometimes the interpretation given to a reading -- to get some of that card's qualities. I see the Queen of Cups as the Queen of Love, the queen of softhearted warmth and compassion, a heart centered person with a great gift of empathy, and the ability to see deeply into others and read their souls. How does one develop more compassion within oneself?

Fulgour	30 Mar 2005
Yes... but the there is the Mother Hen syndrome too.

Fudugazi	30 Mar 2005
I have always felt very close to her. I am Pisces, with lots of Pisces, Scorpio and Cancer in me... She is artistic, imaginative, deep and passionate like the sea, changeable too. She can make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. She feels things in all her wet places. She is gentle and placid as the lagoon and then rises with a huge wave. She can be destructive. She can create the world. Children, birds and dolpins eat in her hand. But then she needs to be alone, suddenly. She can be fierce and direct. She can be so focussed she doesn't see the sun go down. I meditate on the other queens, especially the Queen of Pentacles, to bring some of that earthiness into me. I work with earthy decks like the DruidCraft and walk in the forests of my mountains. But it is always by the streams that my sap quickens and my heart flowers. When the Queen of Cups is far from me I am bereft. Fulgour - whatever your personal correspondences may be - The Queen of Cups is a Pisces lady:) I know is my own loins she is.

Moongold	30 Mar 2005
Queen of Cups is Water of Water - double the emotional intensity. I wouldn't want to be her all the time. Do you know, Pipistrelle - you are aware of the shift within yourself. Perhaps that is where you need to begin. I think about the Queen of Pentacles in the same way, being a Wands person myself. In the RWS deck, notice how close Queen Cups is to the edge of the sea? She looks as if she might topple in any minute. She seems to be reflecting on something. Perhaps those little black angels on that huge cup warn her to measure her feelings a little.

firemaiden	30 Mar 2005
Fulgour wrote: Yes... but the there is the Mother Hen syndrome too. If I were trying to emulate some qualities of a character from the tarot, I would choose only the most postive ones.

Fulgour	30 Mar 2005
firemaiden wrote: If I were trying to emulate some qualities of a character from the tarot, I would choose only the most postive ones. My sister is a Scorpio with a Cancer Moon, and this would make The Queen of Cups one of her Tarot association cards. She has the Mother Hen bug pretty bad, and I was thinking for Pipistrelle to "bring those qualities back" could also have a (slight) downside if all the aspects of this enigmatic Queen were adjudged sugary sweet. Cancer in the Majors is Justice!

Pipistrelle	31 Mar 2005
Moongold wrote: Do you know, Pipistrelle - you are aware of the shift within yourself. Perhaps that is where you need to begin. I think this hits the nail on the head Moongold. I really need to ask what qualities I think I had before that were Queen of Cupsy, in order to know exactly what it is I think I've lost. The last year has been incredible in terms of me "growing up" somewhat - I've had to take more responsibility, I've had to work harder, I've been studying tarot etc. - and I know not all the qualities I used to have were positive, such as daydreaming, being ruled by my emotions, naivete (or at least, they weren't appropriate in certain situations). It's funny that the Queen of Cups has come up. The Page of Cups used to describe me better (only 6 months ago it came up in a reading in that way). Maybe I shouldn't be seeing the Queen of Cups as something I've lost, but the next stage. Maybe I should see this more as: Yes, I shouldn't be losing touch with my cups qualities, but with all I've experienced over the last year it's now time to reintegrate and develop those qualities (from the Page) and adopt a more mature approach (the Queen). The page perhaps is more self-absorbed, whereas the Queen offers out her qualities towards others? It's true that it was the Queen who appeared for "who I used to be", but if she hadn't appeared in both those readings for me, I would never really have made the connection between them. All these replies have been very interesting. I don't think you can suddenly adopt qualities you don't have. But I suppose, if I (for example) kept the Queen of Cups cards from my decks on my desk - as I have them now - over some time, it would serve as a reminder and I would become more aware of those qualities and times when I could express them. Maybe I just need to look for opportunities... Maybe I should also get the Page cards out and then think about the difference between those cards and how to develop "Page of Cupsness" into "Queen of Cupsness" as the Page qualities are something I know I had and still have somewhere (I think maybe current demands have pushed them below the surface). Pip

Fudugazi	31 Mar 2005
Pipistrelle wrote: All these replies have been very interesting. I don't think you can suddenly adopt qualities you don't have. But I suppose, if I (for example) kept the Queen of Cups cards from my decks on my desk - as I have them now - over some time, it would serve as a reminder and I would become more aware of those qualities and times when I could express them. Maybe I just need to look for opportunities... I went on a bit longer about the Queen of Cups - whom I feel close to -than the Queen of Pentacles - who is someone I need to internalise more (as you say you do with the Queen of Cups). As I said, one way I am doing it is woking more with an "Earth" deck and spending more time in forests and gardens. I also try and consciously do some "Queen of Pentacles" things like keep my accounts up to date, do my housework, cook hearty food, hug my loved ones and nurture myself and my loved ones more consciously (which is not the same thing as smothering :)). As firemaiden said, you can, by conscious actions, bring the more positive qualities of the Queen of cups in your life. Begin by approaching her element - if you can walk by the sea, or a lake or river, that's a good start. Think about her when you shower or do the washing-up. Eat more fish (don't laugh!). But also, read poetry, listen to emotional music like Tschaikovski, or watery music like Debussy (La Mer, Images, Prélude à L'Après-Midi d'un Faune) - Debussy was very interested in reproducing water motifs in music. Go and visit art exhibitions. Tell surreal shaggy dog stories to the children (if you have children, or like me, nephews and nieces). All these things feed the Queen of Cups. I wish you much enchantment!

Pipistrelle	31 Mar 2005
Helvetica, thank you! That's exactly what I was looking for...practical ways to connect to the Queen of Cups energy. I am going to make an effort to do all those things. Your post made me realise one possible reason I might be feeling I've "lost" her energy - I used to dance, play the flute, paint, write poetry and stories, but one by one, as other things have taken over, those things have been neglected. I occasionally still write, when the muse gets me, but the other things have been relegated to my "one day..." list, I'm afraid. Funny how things change when you're not paying attention... I also unfortunately lack Earth and the Queen of Pentacles I think is my favourite Queen...I would love to be so capable and calm and caring as her...:) Thank you for your post...it has made me feel positive again :) Pip

Shade	01 Apr 2005
Wear a lot of blue. Have a Mai Tai. Call that friend who complains too much and just listen until he or she becomes exhausted. Sit in front of a mirror for as long as you can stand it (don't have flourescent lights on). Moisturize. Watch Return to Me, Beautiful, Latter Days, or Legends of the Fall. Listen to Enya. Read anything by Starhawk.

Keslynn	01 Apr 2005
You can also try taking the position of the Queen of Cups. I find that taking a character's pose can often give you some insight into what they're thinking and feeling. It's like the Dancing the Tarot described in Tarot and Magic. You could try writing from her perspective too. :) Kes

temperlyne	01 Apr 2005
Do you know the Lamb song- I cry- ? To me it represents the emotional deepness of this queen perfectly. It's about a woman who really feels every aspect of life. Listnening to it always makes me aware of my own queen of cupsness side. Just a suggestion.

Enchanted	01 Apr 2005
The idea of bringing a 'Queen' that you feel you have lost into your life is very interesting. I really like all of the suggestions. I love the Queen of Cups, she represents my 'squishy' centre, underneath the fire and the earth. As you said you used to dance and play the flute and all those other things I think that the Queen is telling you to take them off the 'one day' list and put them on the 'today' list. They are obviously very important parts of who you are or building on who you are. I would imagine that those pursuits are a real emotional outlet for you too where you can really express yourself. My suggestion for feeling more Queen of Cupness: watch "The Notebook" with plenty of tissues and chocolate! :)

Pipistrelle	03 Apr 2005
Thank you all for your replies. I have not felt the lack of this Queen as strongly since the day I started this thread but this may be because I became aware of the lack. I am taking little steps, such as just trying to remember my dreams and asking myself how I FEEL about things more often. I also am quite good at recognising when my brain is going into overdrive - it's like an addiction, I feel I must just look up xyz or jot this idea down, or learn this....! So I'm convincing myself to back off...not always, but sometimes ;) Just sitting quietly and not thinking about much at all seems to help as well...especially with a nice cup of tea :) Thank you for all your suggestions everyone. Maybe we need a list of things like this for each of the Queens... Pip

Breathhh	04 Apr 2005
Hello all what a lovely evloving sharing. As a new person to this circle, this is exactly what brings me to the richness and connectedness I have to the wonder of tarot and the depth of sharing that Pip initiated. thank you thank you I like the idea of giving the Queens each a list to consider. So. I shall begin a new thread. ( I think thats a good idea??) maybe we could start a thread for each queen and each add our own insights. what do you think? so...I will invite the Queen of swords (air) to our round table and see what happens. maybe what has been said of the Queenie of cupness and pentacles can be restated in their own thread. ya think?? thanks... here I go.. jumpin' in. breathhh

firemaiden	05 Apr 2005
Fulgour wrote: My sister is a Scorpio with a Cancer Moon, and this would make The Queen of Cups one of her Tarot association cards. She has the Mother Hen bug pretty bad, and I was thinking for Pipistrelle to "bring those qualities back" could also have a (slight) downside if all the aspects of this enigmatic Queen were adjudged sugary sweet. Cancer in the Majors is Justice! My dear Fulgour, forgive me for being frank, but I must view the application of astrology to tarot as optional, and of dubious value. As I see it, the marriage is an unhappy one for the tarot, for it robs tarot of its greatest virtue, that of chaos, randomness, the aleatory, and burdens it heavily with reductive and stereotypical little boxes, like "being a mother hen". Instead, I would encourage someone who is adventuring to emulate the qualities of a tarot card, not to view the card in terms of some pre-written stereotype, but rather -- to look at the card, and see what qualities you personally admire in it.

Fulgour	05 Apr 2005
firemaiden wrote: My dear Fulgour, forgive me for being frank, but I must view the application of astrology to tarot as optional, and of dubious value. Astrology, the way I experience it, isn't what other people think, it's what I have learned ~ astrology is a langauge of metaphors, and like music or art, the "beauty" is in the eye of the beholder.

Fudugazi	06 Apr 2005
I have been doing something very interesting! I have three decks (the Crystal Tarot, the Balbi Tarot and El Gran Tarot Esoterico) that all attribute to Cups the elment of AIR. Now that's fascinating! I love water so of course I have always felt close to the Queen of Cups. And here I have these lovely cups filled with breeze and butterflies and birds.... So what do I do with that? Well I find myself looking at this queen differently. Not as the Queen of Swords - I still keep the attribute of Cups: receptivity, openness, emotion - but I view them from an airy perspective: so the receptivity becomes inspiration; the openness becomes freedom; the emotion is lighter, less wallowing than when it is in water - more spiritual - it climbs high. This also means that the Queen is someone who can think as well as feel - but not in a rationalist, over-zealous way - rather, someone who knows the place of feelings and the place of thought and can weave them together in a balanced fashion. All those butterflies make me think of transformation, too - and isn't it an interesting idea to transform water to air? - What happens then? Clouds - and rain - which brings fertility and makes the landscape grow green. So working with an Air Queen of Cups - water of air - we have a wonderfully novel way of living with this queen. What might she do? - paraglide over the sea - listen to Debussy's Images (I realise it is very airy as well as watery) - draw pictures of birds and butterflies - go cycling along a river, the breeze in her face - play - read a whodunnit - read Shelley's To a Skylark; and listen to real skylarks. - invent new games for the children - say I love you with balloons - make love in a boat rocked by the sea and the wind... And many more adventures that this clever imaginative lady will come up with! Enjoy.....:)

Pipistrelle	06 Apr 2005
Helvetica wrote: Well I find myself looking at this queen differently. Not as the Queen of Swords - I still keep the attribute of Cups: receptivity, openness, emotion - but I view them from an airy perspective: so the receptivity becomes inspiration ; the openness becomes freedom ; the emotion is lighter, less wallowing than when it is in water - more spiritual - it climbs high. What a wonderful blend of air and water - you make it all sound so poetic! It makes me want to try the same thing with combinations of all the elements...I have a tendency to see them as distinct from each other and it would be interesting to put them together and see what I got...especially when they then turn up in readings together :) Pip

tmgrl2	06 Apr 2005
In a reading I did recently for my stepdaughter, whose mom passed away in December, the Queen of Cups showed up in the perseverance position...What do I need to persevere? in my own spread. I used the Gilded Tarot and this lovely queen was facing the right...so even though she represents the feminine, I felt that the right facing queen here was active... I immediately say her mother, as being around and there to give her loving advice whenever she needs it....There is such a "heavenly" feeling about this queen so seeing her mother in this card, seemd so natural.... Sometimes, it simply depends upon the whole spread, the position and even the deck that is used. ...In this case, the card was so spiritual, active...and the queen was offering the cup of love from above. terri Edited to add: I wanted to post my own recent experience first and then go back and read the other posts, many of which have added some dimension for me. I do feel quite strongly, that any card, whether pulled as a single card for the day for oneself or another, or whether it is part of a spread....must be read in the moment for the person...allowing for the imagery to awaken imagination, inspiration and intuition.... That may, for some people, tap into background knowledge they hold within from astrology, numerology, kaballah, learned meanings....the list goes on... Ultimately though, I have to say that it is the reflection on the image that brings up the message for the moment. terri

The Queen of Cupsness thread was originally posted on 30 Mar 2005 in the Using Tarot Cards board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Using Tarot Cards, or read more archived threads.