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Jewel  Jewel is offline
Join Date: 25 Oct 2001
Location: Somewhere in the Sea
Posts: 6,164
Step 15 - Fantastic Menagerie

CARD: Star Card
DECK: Fantastic Menagerie

This step was quite interesting for me as there were multiple figures in the card. So I dialogued with them all.

J: What are you doing?
DF: I'm just sitting here on the ibis-woman's shoulder resting and watching you.
J: Why are you watching me?
DF: I think you are funny looking, big, and I want to see what you do.
J: Why do you care what I do?
DF: I don't really. I have bigger issues like a short life span and those hungry fish down there.
J: What do you have to teach me?
DF: Sometimes you just need to stay still and observe what is around you. It can save your life.
J: What do you represent in my life?
DF: I represent your awareness ... or lack of it as the case may be.

J: What are you doing?
IW: I'm admiring nature and ejoying my surroundings.
J: Why do you wear those vines around your neck and body?
IW: For one, I like the way they look. For another, to remind me that I usually get myslef into my own binds ... if you know what I mean ...
J: How do you get in binds?
IW: I just like to stroll, and feel, and contemplate, so sometimes I'm just not watching what I am doing, or where I am going to closely, or what others are saying, and well .... I sometimes end up in situations that I am not quite sure how I got into in the first place. These vines I wear help me stay focused and more aware.
J: What do you want?
IW: I want peace, internal as well as peace for the world. I want people to realize thier potential and in turn help others do so. I want honesty. I also want to be left to my own devices. Some of these expectations are quite contradictory, I know, but its what I want.
J: What do you mean by honesty?
IW: By honesty I mean no self-delusions, no white lies to the self, and open communication. I cannot expect honesty from others if I cannot be honest with myself.
J: Even if that honesty is painful?
IW: That is where empathy and delivery of the message come in. Even or perhaps specially when communicating with the self.
J: Do you think I am honest?
IW: Your starting to be now that your hanging around me.
J: What do you have to teach me?
IW: That self-worth and self-respect are the key. If you cannot feel these for yourself you cannot honestly feel them for another. With self-worth and self-respect you will always know who YOU are and you can achieve and change anything you want to, because you trully have your whole self.
J: What do you represent in my life?
IW: I represent your spirit, desires, and intentions.

J: What are you all doing?
F: Making way for the ibis-woman and trying to catch that dragonfly.
J: Why are you all 1/2 way out of the water?
F: So we can see better and so we can reach better for the dragonfly and eat him.
J: Why do you want to eat the dragonfly?
F: Because it is the way of nature, he is food to us.
J: Are you serenading the ibis-woman?
F: No, we are trying to eat the dragonfly. We already told you that.
J: What do you have to teach me?
F: If you stay out of the water too long you will die.
J: What kind of lesson is that?!?!?!
F: A basic one.
J: Can you elaborate on that?!?!?!?
F: Human's just don't get it. Everyone has a natural environment. You can stay in it or take risks following your instincts and push the boundaries. If you don't take risks nothing changes, if all you do is push bondaries you will end up in a different environment of which you know nothing. If you push some, then stop, incorporate the new environment with your own environment, then you will be ready to push again and make your environment bigger.
J: What do you represent in my life:
F: We represent your subconcious mind.

OK ....... so the dragonfly is an observer, the ibis-woman partially a dreamer but wants to wake up, and the fish are my higher self?????? And I really found the fish to be incredibly obnoxious. Too bad that tone of voice cannot be conveyed when typing *LOL*. So I get the message, and it is not what I want to hear, and what is worse is that the message has been reconfirmed using two different oracle decks (and one was a reading someone did for me with zero awareness of any of this).

Sooooooo ..... seems like I live in my own world, without really realizing that I have isolated myself, so I have been pushing people away yet finding them anyoning and intrusive. I say I want one thing, but hide in my perfect little world but honestly I am ready to come out. Now that I know I am hiding, I am not wanting to come up but will even if I don't like the idea (fish 1/2 out of the water) And I finally learn that the whole thing has to do with a fear of loosing "my" identity by really incorporating someone elses needs into my life. There is much work for me to do here, but awareness has hit me in the face, and the issue is now officially and clearly identified. I have only child syndrome and don't want to be cured *LOL*. Just kidding I really am working on this ... now ... but what a shocker! Did not think it was me that had the problem - but it is ... I so miss denial, it was such a better place
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