i would alter the order slightly:
1-what i can do for myself spiritually
2-what i can do for myself in my relationship with him
3-how i can help myself emotionally
4-what i can do for him
5-how to forgive myself
6-how to forgive him
7-how to let him go
then place the cards into either steps:
.......................7
:::::::::::::::::::
...............5......6
:::::::::::::
.......3......4
:::::::
1.....2
or a pyramid:
.................7
.............5.....6
.......3.................4
1...............................2
i've lost a couple of people who were close to me. just make sure that you make all your amends now, no matter what his behavior has been like. you are 50% of that relationship, and that's a lot. parent or no, that half is your responsibility. if your 50% is in good shape, then even if only part of his half is in order, that still makes for a
mostly good relationship.
i made that decision several years before my father died, and thankfully, i could be at peace with his death. i still have regrets about what i did while he was alive, especially as a teenager, but i can always look back and know that in the last few years of his life, i did all i could, and we actually developed a really sweet, affectionate relationship.
peace to you, and by all means turn to the tarot cards now! if they are the source of strength and inspiration for you that they are for me, then you need them now more than ever.
brightest of blessings,
~Urs