Hierophant in relationships when it doesn't mean marriage?

plato

Granted I'm a novice, but I associate the Hierophant (in terms of relationships) as something stable and traditional, like a marriage. I can't help but think it doesn't apply here.

Recently I was ghosted by a man I've been seeing for a couple months who lost his wife a year ago to cancer. Right before he went Poof, he was telling me it was the first time since his wife he had felt that way, was looking at places to rent in my town to be closer to me, etc. In fact, his last words to me were very positive. Him leaving was completely out of the blue and was done without an explanation.

I've been left here trying to put the pieces together, attempting to understand what had happened. When I ask about our future (usually in an attempt to find out if I'll ever hear from him again and get some kind of closure), without fail, I've always received The Hierophant in the outcome or future position. It leaves me dissatisfied and continuously looking for answers, because I just don't know what it's trying to tell me.

The only thing I can think of is, "he hasn't let go of his marriage yet and freaked out." But that would make more sense to me in the present position.

What gives? I highly doubt I'll be walking down the aisle with him at this point, hah!
 

PAMUYA

What type of spread did you use? What was the question? Surrounding cards?
For me the Hierophant refers to the norms of your culture. In the culture I am in, this can be living together, or causual dating, even friends with benefits. If someone "poofs" after 3 dates without a formal break up or conversation something is up. Surrounding cards would be helpful. Perhaps the hieophant meant that he is still married.
 

IndigoWaves

plato said:
The only thing I can think of is, "he hasn't let go of his marriage yet and freaked out." But that would make more sense to me in the present position.
Click to expand...
I get that same feeling. The Hierophant's bond is a very hard one to break, especially when a break isn't willingly sought (re: death). He may need a lot more time to truly move beyond it, if he ever does at all.

Also, while deception isn't normally in this card on its own and I didn't get that particular vibe, myself, PAMUYA raises a valid point: You might want to consider how well you really know, or don't know, this man and his life/past -- as well as any suspect cards that may or may not be appearing in your readings on him... I.e., if things seem to lean in a deceptively hidden direction, especially if they did all along/well before he disappeared, I'd wonder if this man may actually still have a wife (perhaps going "poof" because he was found out or she was just starting to catch on).
 

Mystica7

Yes, you need to find out if he is married or not (to someone else) at the moment.

Hierophant represents the status quo, it's pretty much a static card, boring, which more often than not in the outcome position foretells the news that "nothing is really going to change".

Alternatively, the card may be asking you to trust your own intuition more here to reach into a conclusion, since Hierophant also represents good counsel, but of an inner kind.
 

rwcarter

The tradition aspect of the Hierophant under the circumstances you included could suggest that the "traditional" period of grieving associated with widowhood might be at play. It's not the more personal 5C type of grieving for what's been lost, but the more societal you must wait X period before you can move on. Of course that period is different for different people, communities, cultures, etc.

So your future with him depends on when he feels that period of grieving has passed.

Rodney
 

headincloud

I would go with the traditional meaning of the card but investigate how that can be so if it seems so unlikely. Basically all you've got is an outcome card without knowing his current position on things, he may be grieving or terrified of commitment at present.

I suggest questions like his current position, hopes, fears, your position etc, devise your own little 6 card spread.
 

Grizabella

If he's not someone you've interacted with in person and who has contacted you online, I'd strongly suspect he's still married to a live spouse. In that case, maybe his wife caught him in cyber town.

On the other hand, if he's somebody you know in person and know for a fact that his wife died, he may just not be ready to get into a relationship yet. I lost my husband in August of 2000 and it took me years to even get past that so that I might consider another relationship. I'm 71 years old now and have no desire to even have a romance. For someone else, though, the thought of being with another person romantically or sexually may be appealing because he's so lonely but then when it comes right down to it, he spooks and disappears.

My son lost his wife to cancer about 18 months ago and he's still grieving and hasn't shown any signs of any desire to move past that and start a new relationship.
 

Ruby Jewel

plato said:
Granted I'm a novice, but I associate the Hierophant (in terms of relationships) as something stable and traditional, like a marriage. I can't help but think it doesn't apply here.

Recently I was ghosted by a man I've been seeing for a couple months who lost his wife a year ago to cancer. Right before he went Poof, he was telling me it was the first time since his wife he had felt that way, was looking at places to rent in my town to be closer to me, etc. In fact, his last words to me were very positive. Him leaving was completely out of the blue and was done without an explanation.

I've been left here trying to put the pieces together, attempting to understand what had happened. When I ask about our future (usually in an attempt to find out if I'll ever hear from him again and get some kind of closure), without fail, I've always received The Hierophant in the outcome or future position. It leaves me dissatisfied and continuously looking for answers, because I just don't know what it's trying to tell me.

The only thing I can think of is, "he hasn't let go of his marriage yet and freaked out." But that would make more sense to me in the present position.

What gives? I highly doubt I'll be walking down the aisle with him at this point, hah!
Click to expand...

Watch out for the Hierophant because he can also be the Devil....especially if Rx or indicated by surrounding cards. Imo, I would let it go.....there is a reason this has happened. Accept it and move on....especially since you do not really know this person and it is in the initial stages. I would not even think about marriage with this chap. I say he is possibly the Devil masquerading as the Hierophant...a phony. In fact, my intuition says, "narcissist". I recommend you go to Utube and look up "Narcissistic Personality Disorder" and learn about it. Certainly can't hurt.
 

JoJoCat

I got this card for a previous relationship too -- and learned it means (for me) as Mystica7 said "things stay the same". In the situation I'd interpret it to mean that nothing changes bc tradition means not rocking the boat


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

nisaba

Welcome to the forum, Plato.

Asking about a future and getting the Heirophant in the circumstances you describe, probably just indicates that he vanished because he felt that something was wrong, not above-board or not traditionally correct. It may also point to you needing to be more -er- old-fashioned in any dealings with him (or people who resemble him) in the future.
 
The Death card stalking me in 2017 Hanged Man Rx as finances