dream of stairs

[celticnoodle]

I had a dream the other night of myself visiting family members. We went to one family members 'home', though they never had a home like this ever. I recall walking into their home, and many of the other members were already there.

The owner of the home was in the kitchen, with her daughter and granddaughter--all the age they are currently. Another grandson to this owner was also in the dream, but he was very young in the dream, when in reality he is getting ready to go off to college this September. His other sister was also in my dream, but she varied in age--sometimes being rather young, about 8yrs. old and then at her current age, in her early 20s. The owners son was also in the dream.

When the dream takes place, I was in the entry way of the home, with the stairs off to the right of me, and the youngest granddaughter was standing with me, at age 8yrs. of age. the owner came out from the kitchen area to our left and handed me a bunch of things to carry up to her second floor and was quite snippy about it. in life, she is like this--snippy. When she handed these items to me, and I took them, graciously and told her 'yes, I'll take them up for you', my 8yr old companion rolled her eyes and began walking up with me. She noted that "Grandma always leaves a bunch of stuff on her steps in hope that people going upstairs will pick them up for her. look at all this crap on her steps. (Again, in reality, she did do this when she had multi-story homes. she is currently in a small home on one level though).

On our way up the stairs, which were winding on a slight curve, there were about 7 steps and then a huge landing--then you curved to the left and it was about another 7 or 8 steps up to the 2nd level. It is interesting to note in my dream, on the way up, after we reached the landing, the landing and the remaining steps leading to the 2nd floor were devoid of any more 'crap'.

We walked down a hallway and peeked into one open bedroom belonging to the owners grown up son - (currently in his 60s, married and on his own, but in my dream--he lived w/his mother and was not married) and we each exchanged pleasantries.

then, we deposited the items we were given and picked up along the way upstairs into the correct bedroom and upon coming out to go back downstairs, the steps that we had to take downstairs were straight stairs going directly back down. they still held more crap on them, the whole way down the flight of stairs- which girl, now in her 20s in the dream, pointed out to me on the way down, snickering the whole time about it.

Now, I am normally fairly good at trying to figure out dreams. I think that the curvy steps with the landing mark half way up indicate my transformation and growth. This relative of mine and I were never really close, but I did visit her often and she made sure when I did, I was at her beck and call, jumping up and down doing things for her, taking her places-stores and to her friends homes, etc. She is very critical of people--and people tend to be wary about her as a result and try to stay away from her if possible because of her bossiness. I would always bite the bullet doing things for her and taking her to her friends or out to eat and shop, because her children near her refused to do so, as she was so awful in public too.

I have other ideas as to what this is meaning for me, especially since I had my young companion and this owners older son in it, who are the only other ones in the dream (beside the owner) talking to me. It is very much like how it is in real life--the ones in the dream rarely talk to me, unless they happen to bump into me and this woman in a store or something when I visit her.

The part where we take our descent down another set of stairs I think could relate to me still falling back into the 'quiet observer' where this woman is concerned and not being as vocal in the defense of those she condemns more so. I am in that group - probably a lot more then I even realize, btw. she is just a nasty piece of work and never happy, poor thing. I notice that though there were hand rails on each side of the stairs, I never once used them -- going up or descending. In real life, I always have to hold onto handrails--due to leg and back issues--but in my dream, I'm standing tall and confident and climbing and descending w/o a problem. This is the part that really confuses me in the descent, because generally going down a flight of stairs indicates setbacks. I would think that because it is in this family members 'home'--and she is a known thorn in everyones side, that my setbacks would have to do with her. but then, why am I descending the stairs so confidently and amused with my poor companion who is still pointing out all the "crap" on the stairs to take care of.

In reality, this woman is also hard on this young girl though in reality, this girl is a very motivated, independent and intelligent young lady. she is still young and immature, but not grossly so. She also is one who 'puts up' with her grandmother, for she was raised to be so, but she does it grudgingly, though sometimes she will reach her limit and tell her grandmother off--albeit not with the tact, I think I have mastered. but, probably that comes with age.

anyone have any other ideas as to what this could be signifying for me?

[Starshower]

Hi, celticnoodle. How fascinating! I dream of stairs often too, & also equate them with my emotional & spiritual growth, & increasing ability to 'rise above' the irritations, embarrassments & unfairnesses (from a highly critical, 'snippy' relative too!) that used to bother me sooo much when I was younger.
As you say, this dream could indicate your inner sense of progressing to a higher level of consciousness (houses often symbolise our sense of place in life, & even the levels of ego we occupy.) Could all the piles of 'crap' you are asked to carry up stand for the help your relative needs (but hasn't directly asked for) on a non-physical level? Maybe she needs you to help her sort out & carry to a higher level her mental & emotional 'baggage'?
Her young granddaughter doesn't yet have the maturity to understand or empathise with her grandmother, so in the dream she just sniggers & copies her critical ways - but you say 'poor thing' & do show greater kind-heartedness. (Being out of the situation daily helps!)
The fact that the higher level is clear of clutter shows that you can see clarity ahead ... clearer understanding? And so, once you have done the job the grandmother needed, you are free to descend unencumbered - since you are no longer bogged down by her demands & criticisms & have found your inner strength, reflected in your lithe bodily strength (not using the handrails.)

Do you think it could indicate that you can make the free choice to come down to her level from your higher one easily now, (unlike the still-maturing, still-struggling granddaughter) & help her ascend too?

(ps I now think that my similar-sounding relative might have had Asperger's syndrome, which was unheard-of in her time. It can make people very edgy, routine-ridden, critical because afraid of change, & socially inept & un-self-aware. I shall never know - but if so, her bossiness & low tolerance of differences would be explained, & I could look back & see her as struggling with a neurological processing difference, rather than being plain insensitive & mean!)

[celticnoodle]

Originally Posted by Starshower

Hi, celticnoodle. How fascinating! I dream of stairs often too, & also equate them with my emotional & spiritual growth, & increasing ability to 'rise above' the irritations, embarrassments & unfairnesses (from a highly critical, 'snippy' relative too!) that used to bother me sooo much when I was younger.
As you say, this dream could indicate your inner sense of progressing to a higher level of consciousness (houses often symbolise our sense of place in life, & even the levels of ego we occupy.) Could all the piles of 'crap' you are asked to carry up stand for the help your relative needs (but hasn't directly asked for) on a non-physical level? Maybe she needs you to help her sort out & carry to a higher level her mental & emotional 'baggage'?

yes, I guess this could be so--especially as it seems to accumulate when I am known to be coming to visit--and I notice that her daughter and son and oldest granddaughter seem to be very vacant when they know I am coming and will do her bidding. other wise, from what I understand they are constantly battered w/phone calls and pleas for them to come help her and have no choice but to go and do her bidding.

Her young granddaughter doesn't yet have the maturity to understand or empathise with her grandmother, so in the dream she just sniggers & copies her critical ways - but you say 'poor thing' & do show greater kind-heartedness. (Being out of the situation daily helps!)

yes, it does, help tremendously.

The fact that the higher level is clear of clutter shows that you can see clarity ahead ... clearer understanding? And so, once you have done the job the grandmother needed, you are free to descend unencumbered - since you are no longer bogged down by her demands & criticisms & have found your inner strength, reflected in your lithe bodily strength (not using the handrails.)

ah, yes. I can see this.

Do you think it could indicate that you can make the free choice to come down to her level from your higher one easily now, (unlike the still-maturing, still-struggling granddaughter) & help her ascend too?

yes, very much so.

(ps I now think that my similar-sounding relative might have had Asperger's syndrome, which was unheard-of in her time. It can make people very edgy, routine-ridden, critical because afraid of change, & socially inept & un-self-aware. I shall never know - but if so, her bossiness & low tolerance of differences would be explained, & I could look back & see her as struggling with a neurological processing difference, rather than being plain insensitive & mean!)

I don't believe this woman has Asperger's syndrome, but definitely is a troubled person--thus she has a hard time finding happiness. Further more, when she sees other people who are happy, it tends to bother her a great deal and this is when she begins to cause problems by imitating them in grotesque parody. She finds it funny and sometimes in small groups of people will do this. People are generally not comfortable with her behaving this way, but will never bring it up. just smile and quickly change the subject.

thank you for your reply, it has helped me to understand this dream more.

[frac_ture]

Hi, celticnoodle -- wow, what an interesting and vivid-sounding dream! I don't want to rehash everything Starshower said, which was some pretty incisive stuff. I also don't know what psych professionals or seasoned dream interpreters would make of stairs as symbols in dreams, so aside from obvious possible meanings, I won't try to get all deep on that score...

The main thing that really struck me was the morphing of the stairs themselves. On your way up -- which I see as your chronological and emotional evolution (witness how the granddaughter is a girl of 8 years at the start/bottom, but a young woman in her early 20's upon reaching the top) -- the way is cluttered with "crap" set there by your elders and predecessors, and you can't see all the way to the conclusion of your climb. The stairs bend so as to make this impossible...

After you manage to climb above the "crap," though, and interact with the other family member (who, in the dream, was still somewhat under the harsh grandmother's thumb, from the sound of it), the stairs, while still cluttered, have become straight...and traversing them now is an easier trip that's assisted by gravity (going down something is often easier than going up that same thing -- not always, but often). I think it's indicative of your own transformation, as you said. I'd say this all means that you've managed to ascend overall in your life to a new level of maturity and self-realization, and dealing with your family has much less hold over you and your identity than it maybe once had. As you grew, dealing with them and making your way in the world were more difficult prospects, with less clear pathways for you to travel, but at some point, you made it to a new plateau (or in this case, landing/floor/level...), and now you have an easier time of it, you've matured, and you see the way. Others might also recognize this, and even look to you as an example they can follow and draw strength from (like the two people in the dream might, for example).

I'm omitting a lot of other possible symbolism, I realize, but the metamorphosis of the stairs seems really significant to me!

[celticnoodle]

Originally Posted by frac_ture

Hi, celticnoodle -- wow, what an interesting and vivid-sounding dream! I don't want to rehash everything Starshower said, which was some pretty incisive stuff. I also don't know what psych professionals or seasoned dream interpreters would make of stairs as symbols in dreams, so aside from obvious possible meanings, I won't try to get all deep on that score...

The main thing that really struck me was the morphing of the stairs themselves. On your way up -- which I see as your chronological and emotional evolution (witness how the granddaughter is a girl of 8 years at the start/bottom, but a young woman in her early 20's upon reaching the top) -- the way is cluttered with "crap" set there by your elders and predecessors, and you can't see all the way to the conclusion of your climb. The stairs bend so as to make this impossible...

After you manage to climb above the "crap," though, and interact with the other family member (who, in the dream, was still somewhat under the harsh grandmother's thumb, from the sound of it), the stairs, while still cluttered, have become straight...and traversing them now is an easier trip that's assisted by gravity (going down something is often easier than going up that same thing -- not always, but often). I think it's indicative of your own transformation, as you said. I'd say this all means that you've managed to ascend overall in your life to a new level of maturity and self-realization, and dealing with your family has much less hold over you and your identity than it maybe once had. As you grew, dealing with them and making your way in the world were more difficult prospects, with less clear pathways for you to travel, but at some point, you made it to a new plateau (or in this case, landing/floor/level...), and now you have an easier time of it, you've matured, and you see the way. Others might also recognize this, and even look to you as an example they can follow and draw strength from (like the two people in the dream might, for example).

I'm omitting a lot of other possible symbolism, I realize, but the metamorphosis of the stairs seems really significant to me!

Frac_ture, that is a great interpretation. Yes, I do think that I've managed to ascend overall in my life to a new level of maturity & self-realization. The dealing of my family most definitely has a much less hold over me. This all came about when I finally just began to confront them - especially this overbearing woman--when it would start. I just finally had to draw the line and not allow it anymore. I'm not so sure how the others might be looking at me as an example they can follow--but I definitely think that the older woman sees this in me-as someone who no longer will be fooled into letting her do or say whatever she wants and whenever she wants.

thank you, Frac_ture. very interesting thoughts there--I think you've hit on an important part of the dream for me.