Justice being repetitive as Shadow Card

[Thirteen]

Originally Posted by pacificwaters

Since quite some time, (two years) there have been issues between me and my wife. While I am ready to forget the old issues and move on, she on the other hand is absolutely adamant on the strained ties that are existing between the two of us

I think I would feel the same as your wife if a lawyer was involved in forcing me to return to my husband. I would feel that there'd been an injustice, and until things were put right, until things were fair (i.e. I could bring in a lawyer to get what I wanted), that I wasn't going to let anything go. Why should I?

I notice, Pacificwaters, that you keep asking the cards about this situation, yet you never seem to act on the answers you get. Justice demands that you see things from the wife's point of view, not yours. You got what you wanted (her back) and now you want to forget the issues and move on--that is what YOU want. But what would she gain from that? You gain a lot. Does she? If she doesn't get anything she wants, then there's no justice. The scales are balanced in your favor and only in your favor.

That's not fair. And that means there's no inducement for her to accept your offer. It's like if you were selling your house and wanted a certain price. You might accept a lower price if you were eager to sell the house. But what if someone offered to take your house off your hands if you paid them money? You'd think that pretty unfair, wouldn't you? You gain nothing and they gain everything, money and house. So there's no reason for you to accept their offer.

If you want things to change with your wife, then you have to make an offer that gives her something she wants, not an offer that only benefits you. That's Justice. I think you know this. But you refuse to do it. Which is why this card is haunting you and will continue to haunt you. It's why you keep asking the the cards for answers to this situation over and over again, because you're hoping they'll give you a magic answer that will give you what you want. But you don't get the answers you want from the tarot, you get the answers that are right and true. And the right and true answer here is that you're not being fair. However flexible and equitable you think you're being, you're still trying to have things your way and only your way.

The cards won't change until you act on them and do what you know you must rather than what you want. Otherwise, you're going to be stuck with such cards reminding you that justice hasn't been done...and when it comes to this card, which is also a card of karma, you could be stuck with it for more than this one life.

[lotus2blossom]

Originally Posted by pacificwaters

As regards your mention about this book on Jungian thought - are you by any chance refering to "Tarot as a way of life: A Jungian approach to tarot" - Karen Hamaker Zondag?? I have this book and haven't actually browsed through it..! But in case if this is what you are indicating, then I would definitely go through it today..!

Yes, that's the book I'm referring to. It breaks down the psychological process of each card in accordance to Jung's model of the psyche.

[pacificwaters]

Originally Posted by lotus2blossom

Yes, that's the book I'm referring to. It breaks down the psychological process of each card in accordance to Jung's model of the psyche.

Thanks for the confirmation. I shall be going through this book today, both for the Devil and Justice

[willowfox]

What she thinks of you? Justice


Cold and calculating, with no emotional feelings of any kind.

[pacificwaters]

Originally Posted by willowfox

What she thinks of you? Justice


Cold and calculating, with no emotional feelings of any kind.

This just fits the bill. There are so many instances of her behavior towards me that came flooding to my mind just with the word "no emotional feelings"!!

Thank you so very much

[pacificwaters]

Originally Posted by starrystarrynight

Justice often points out the need for honesty, logic and harmony in a situation. Here, it may simply be telling you that things are out of balance, and until that balance is restored, nothing will be resolved. Therefore, you may want to ask the cards what you need to do in order to attempt to restore harmony between your wife and yourself (there may not be anything you can do to accomplish this--but the cards should be able to tell you that, as well.)

That is probably a good question i can ask of the cards. Until now it was mostly What she thinks of me. The question you suggested might have something better to offer :fingers crossed: I am ready to try anything as long as my marriage would work!

[Tiggy-cat]

Originally Posted by WalesWoman

The only good relationship is one between equals and that is why Justice is coming up as a shadow, there is no balance here and the justice is of it is ironic... you got what you wanted, even if it really isn't what you hoped for. You can't make someone love you by forcing them to be there and it sounds to me she is giving you all she feels you deserve... sorry.

Well, after this hearing your side of the story, we know what the Devil card in that other thread means, because you forced her to come back and now she refuses to leave.

This makes perfect sense, Wales Woman.

[WalesWoman]

Justice... being able to see both sides impassively and finding the truth hidden somewhere in there

Justice... being totally honest with yourself, about yourself, your wife and how things got to this point and the parts you both played to reach this state. We all have our flaws and sometimes the hardest thing is recognizing them and admitting them and asking for forgiveness for wrongs we might not even realize we have done... or forgiving the other for their wrongs. So often our focus goes to all that is wrong and can't see what was right any longer, this is probably true for both of you.

Justice... finding the center and what is really at the heart of all this contention. Honestly, have you asked her what she wants and expects without it becoming an argument? Have you told her how all this makes you feel and how you truly feel about her? The biggest thing is not to allow yourself the luxury of playing the blame game and casting oneself in the role of the victim... even while it may feel and seem so... once that happens the other person is always the bad guy and I think that each of you are doing that very thing. While both of you may feel the other is wrong, the real victim will be your child. No matter if one is being victimized or not, it creates a feeling of helplessness, which makes one more defensive and less likely to listen to what is really being said or done or felt by another. It also creates stubbornness and resistance, because if one cannot be the victim any longer, they have to face the truth of their actions & role they played and admit their own flaws...

Justice... seek an arbitrator, someone who can be impassive, where you both can air your grievances and may offer advice on how to reconcile these differences.

Justice... seeking truth, justice and honor, doing the right thing even when it's not what you want or wish for or want to see. There is so much emotional stuff going on, you really need to distance yourself from them rather than acting on them... accept things as they are, not because it's fair, but because it's a place to begin from... as two equal adults in a contract... and maybe, just maybe you both will find a balance that you can live with and respect each other again... and maybe, just maybe from that, affection and love.

[pacificwaters]

I appreciate the various takes on Justice you posted here Waleswoman.

To be very frank I have tried everything humanly possible. I have offered dialogues between families, have offered to go to a counsellor together and even her relatives have offered to help. What more is left. Nothing. All have been turned down. There is some thing called Obstinancy, which is prevalent here.

I asked the question "What does she think about me" where I kept getting the Justice as Shadow card because I wanted to know what she feels about me. Even a hint of good message from the cards was enough to help me upp the antennae and improve efforts for cordial ties.

I have always wanted and still want the marriage to work, but like a saying in India goes - You can't clap with one hand!

[prudence]

Pacificwaters, what caused your wife to leave and go to her parents' home in the first place? Does Justice have anything to do with that? Was there a big fight between the two of you before she left? Was she treated roughly by you, was she grabbed or touched "in anger" by you, ever? Or did she just go over to her parents' home one day for a visit and never came back?

Maybe there is something that needs to be made right, that needs to be rectified, that happened before she left you to return to her family home, because women don't normally just leave a good marriage without a reason. (Unless of course the marriage itself was never her choice to begin with, ie arranged marriage or something similar....which in a way again points to the Justice card, a forced marriage is not one based in anything mutual or fair, and natural, spontaneous love would be very hard to come by in such a situation)