how do you handle a negative reading?

joya250 · 31-05-2002

hello all.

the story: the other day I did a reading for an old co-worker. (she told me the question, then I laid it out later that night and emailed her the next morning) .... Since she was asking about her recent love interest, I used a new spread for "romantic attraction", found in one of my many books. (which I'll post for y'all in another spread). Well, I laid the cards out -- and whew boy! My first thought was "run away screaming" -- 10 Swords, 9 Swords, Queen Wands reversed, Knight Swords reversed -- just to name a few. But, I went through the entire 10 card spread, taking notes on what I saw. Then came the hard part -- how to deliver honestly, but gentlely the results. .... which I think I did an okay job of -- I would tell her the more unsavory aspects, but follow up with the potential positives.

the question: this got me thinking... to ask you all how you handle a difficult spread. I know it's one thing if it's for an "unknown" client -- but quite another when you care for the person.... What do you do when the cards are brutally honest -- and there is not much "good" in the situation?

**wavebreaker** · 31-05-2002

If the cards are "brutally honest", I will be honest too, although I will try to be a little less "brutal" in delivering the message. I don't think I would help a friend by concealing the negative things the cards are saying.

Geenius at Wrok · 01-06-2002

Seconded.

aeonx · 01-06-2002

I did a reading for my cousin on her love affair, and it was obvious from the spread that this guy only used her. He was only after getting into her pants. I didn't know how to tell her, so I sat 'reading' in my 78DW for a long time. I decided to be honest with her though. And it turned out I was right. The jerk even had to be *really* straight-forward with her and tell her.

~aeonx~

Diana · 01-06-2002

edited

Jenny-Li · 01-06-2002

I agree with all the others, but would like to add that no card is JUST bad - I mean they also have solutions and advice added to them, and if the person at least knows what to expect the impact, when that happens in "real life" might be less, because they are prepared and have a pretty good idea of how to handle it.

Therefore I would deliver the reading with advice and support, like "this will be tough, but hang in there because once you've hit the bottom you can only go up, and from there you will gain something you could not have found without this experience..." I might say if the querent gets the 10 of Swords in a crucial position. It's hard, but like Diana says - it's important to be clear with the fact that the querent has to be prepared for anything, and regard it as a warning, perhaps they can take action to prevent that outcome, or at least get some hint on how to deal with it!

Jenny

Umbrae · 01-06-2002

I think I said this before…
I begin (and I think every one should do this, so listen up folks) every reading by asking the sitter “Do you want me to tell you the truth, or only the good things…”
I am now free to read the cards as they speak to me.
As an ethical aside, I do not tell them about birth and death, I will tell them to consult a doctor...

LGarrick · 01-06-2002

What is an example of a:
1. Birth card???
2. Death card??

**Kiama** · 01-06-2002

I have a problem trying to deliver a bad reading... I'm one of those people who will always try and make everything into a positive experience... I suppose I'm one of those annoying readers who tells you what might happen, then goes on to give you advice and lecture you about how you can avoid the bad happening... I always make sure the querent knows they can change the future...

Kiama

Maan · 01-06-2002

I once did a reading my dad about his work and i saw in the cards that he would be dismissed..... It was terrible but i learned that if there is bad new it is much nicer to hear it from a person you like and love!

( he has a new job now

)

joya250 Citizen Join Date: 07 Aug 2001 Location: Maine Posts: 1,139	how do you handle a negative reading? hello all. the story: the other day I did a reading for an old co-worker. (she told me the question, then I laid it out later that night and emailed her the next morning) .... Since she was asking about her recent love interest, I used a new spread for "romantic attraction", found in one of my many books. (which I'll post for y'all in another spread). Well, I laid the cards out -- and whew boy! My first thought was "run away screaming" -- 10 Swords, 9 Swords, Queen Wands reversed, Knight Swords reversed -- just to name a few. But, I went through the entire 10 card spread, taking notes on what I saw. Then came the hard part -- how to deliver honestly, but gentlely the results. .... which I think I did an okay job of -- I would tell her the more unsavory aspects, but follow up with the potential positives. the question: this got me thinking... to ask you all how you handle a difficult spread. I know it's one thing if it's for an "unknown" client -- but quite another when you care for the person.... What do you do when the cards are brutally honest -- and there is not much "good" in the situation?

31-05-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #1

wavebreaker wysiwyg Join Date: 24 Apr 2002 Location: the real world Posts: 3,639	If the cards are "brutally honest", I will be honest too, although I will try to be a little less "brutal" in delivering the message. I don't think I would help a friend by concealing the negative things the cards are saying. __________________ Think for yourselves and let others enjoy the privilege to do so, too. ~Voltaire~

31-05-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #2

Geenius at Wrok Citizen Join Date: 22 Jan 2002 Location: Freeport, IL, US Posts: 498	Seconded. __________________ You've got Thoth on your blouth.

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #3

aeonx Citizen Join Date: 24 Sep 2001 Location: Norway Posts: 1,085	I did a reading for my cousin on her love affair, and it was obvious from the spread that this guy only used her. He was only after getting into her pants. I didn't know how to tell her, so I sat 'reading' in my 78DW for a long time. I decided to be honest with her though. And it turned out I was right. The jerk even had to be really straight-forward with her and tell her. ~aeonx~ __________________ ~~Mistress of the Vowels~~

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #4

Diana Citizen Join Date: 01 Jan 2002 Posts: 8,213	edited Last edited by Diana; 26-03-2006 at 05:26.

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #5

Jenny-Li Citizen Join Date: 31 Mar 2002 Location: Stockholm, Sweden Posts: 937	I agree with all the others, but would like to add that no card is JUST bad - I mean they also have solutions and advice added to them, and if the person at least knows what to expect the impact, when that happens in "real life" might be less, because they are prepared and have a pretty good idea of how to handle it. Therefore I would deliver the reading with advice and support, like "this will be tough, but hang in there because once you've hit the bottom you can only go up, and from there you will gain something you could not have found without this experience..." I might say if the querent gets the 10 of Swords in a crucial position. It's hard, but like Diana says - it's important to be clear with the fact that the querent has to be prepared for anything, and regard it as a warning, perhaps they can take action to prevent that outcome, or at least get some hint on how to deal with it! Jenny

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #6

Umbrae Citizen Join Date: 20 Mar 2002 Location: Upper Left-Coast, USA Posts: 8,847	I think I said this before… I begin (and I think every one should do this, so listen up folks) every reading by asking the sitter “Do you want me to tell you the truth, or only the good things…” I am now free to read the cards as they speak to me. As an ethical aside, I do not tell them about birth and death, I will tell them to consult a doctor...

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #7

LGarrick Resident Join Date: 19 Apr 2002 Location: Sunny CALIFORNIA Posts: 67	umbrae?? What is an example of a: 1. Birth card??? 2. Death card?? __________________ Prayer is asking for rain... Faith is carrying an umbrella! {Iyanla Vanzant}

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #8

Kiama Dancing to the Vodou groove Join Date: 06 Aug 2001 Location: Cardiff, Wales Posts: 6,271	I have a problem trying to deliver a bad reading... I'm one of those people who will always try and make everything into a positive experience... I suppose I'm one of those annoying readers who tells you what might happen, then goes on to give you advice and lecture you about how you can avoid the bad happening... I always make sure the querent knows they can change the future... Kiama __________________ www.kimhuggens.com "Pistis Sophia: the Goddess Tarot" (forthcoming) http://pistissophiatarot.com "Tarot 101: Mastering the Art of Reading the Cards", by Kim Huggens, released by Llewellyn Worldwide, 2010. "Sol Invictus: the God Tarot", Schiffer Books, 2007.

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #9

Maan Citizen Join Date: 05 Aug 2001 Location: Netherlands Posts: 2,053	I once did a reading my dad about his work and i saw in the cards that he would be dismissed..... It was terrible but i learned that if there is bad new it is much nicer to hear it from a person you like and love! ( he has a new job now )

01-06-2002	Ask a Professional Tarot Reader Top #10

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