Umbrae’s Relationship Spread

[Umbrae]

Relattionship spreads are very difficult, because You are dealing with two people, their lives, thoughts, and emotions simultaneously.

You are also looking at the very alive, shifting, and quixotic reality created by the afore mentioned attributes of two people, the third entity we call, the relationship.

You lay it out in three columns. The columns are read both downwards, and from both sides inward. It is set up so that the left column shows Person 1’s path through the relationship; the right column shows that of Person 2. The center column is read both as a separate (third) entity, AND dependant upon the paths of person 1 & 2.

Left column
Person 1 Feels this is the emotional baggage.
Person 1 Needs intellectualized emotion
Person 1 Expected Outcome

Right Column
Person 2 Feels this is the emotional baggage.
Person 2 Needs intellectualized emotion
Person 2 Expected Outcome

Center Column
Core (what the relationship is founded on)
Needs (what the relationship needs)
What we can expect of the relationship (expectations)
The future of the relationship. (Probable reality)

This relationship spread is tricky, and appears slightly difficult.
It is not a, “A=1, B=2, C=3” type spread.

Row A is ‘stuff we drag around with us’. Emotional baggage we use as a ‘root’, or foundation – this is also past. This is Ego’s Regret. Picture it as a large steamer trunk that we drag around…Marleys Ghost’s Chains…

Row B can be read as Hopes or Fears, Ego’s Anxiety about the unknown future. It could also be what we really need, on a very deep level that we don’t want to admit. This is our 'Now'.

So looking at the two outside columns separately, they tend to indicate Feel – Need – Result. However they also simultaneously represent P-P-F; AND baggage brought into the relationship, (They are read downward); simultaneously, but not really. You have to look at the cards and allow them to read themselves to you, let them tell you, “Hey! This is a need issue”, or “Hey, I’m a Fear”. Hopes and needs are similar.

After reading the two outside columns downwards, comes the big task. Reading from the outside towards the center.

A center card should not be read ‘by itself’; it is best read as to how it has been 'created' by the two cards on either side. Or perhpas even...How it creates the cards on either side.

This spread is not so much about 'card meanings' as 'flow', and how the cards interact with each other.

For example, the second row is entirely dependant on the cards above it. The second row is a result...and the the third is a result...all the way down...

That's step two - the center is dependant on the outside cards, and lower cards are results of higher cards...

Step three (and the most difficult and strange)...

Look at the whole unit as a 'flow', not as 10 cards, but as 1 piece of art. look for how the power or love or passion play out as you move down (remember - you're not looking at 10 cards).

Here's a thought. Go to a gallery or a Museum first. Look at art.

Look at some Monet's. NOT online. Real live stuff. Dale Chihuly glasswork will do too.

Look at all kinds of art. Immerse yourself in art.

You don’t think about what Monet or Chihuly or Renoir or Granville or Dali or Escher or Roger Dean or Gauguin…or what they did or were 'trying to say'...or how they did it...

How does it make you feel?

Remember finger painting as a child in school? The feel of the paint between your fingers? The feel when you looked at the result?

That’s the flow you want to look at when looking at this spread. I often suggest laying it out so you can ‘get some distance’, where a 7 of Swords loses its details, and becomes a blur of color.

Is there a card that the whole of the spread seems to 'revolve' around? Does one card work as a 'hinge'? Is there a balance all the way down? Does a harmonious whole become two distinct and separate entities with that last card making a singular statement?

Forget meaings - think art - think how does it make you feel...

Do not use reversals…

This spread was designed for use with the WCS, how the colors ‘flow’ will vary based on decks. Monochromatic decks should NOT be used.

(When I was wearing glasses, I'd take my glasses off so the whole spread would blurr - then I'd read the blur. You may try looking through plastic wrap...)

It is well worth investing the time to learn it. I have used this spread for years...with excellent results.




Edited to add:

Originally Posted by Umbrae

Lay the cards out on the floor, or something, and get as far away as you can (six to ten feet) so you can see them from far away. you dont' want to see card details. each card should be a blur of color. Are you myoptic? take off your glasses and look. if you cannot get far enough away for the cards to blur out, look through cellophane wrap.

Originally Posted by Solitaire*

I've seen you say to do this before and I've always wondered----do you do this when you're reading for someone else in person? In public? Or only when reading for yourself or someone else in a private reading?

Sarcastic answer (Not to be taken seriously – but…joke explained): A Reader should never get up during a reading! They should always stay seated and covered by an overly large spread cloth. If they stand up, the sitter will realize that the reader has lost their trousers!

Real answer: sure get up. Walk around. Even if you’re doing a simple three card spread. Try to get up and walk around once in a while – especially if your really stuck – change your perspective! Jump up and down!

There is no rule that says:

”Thou Shalt Remain Seated at All Times During a Reading!
Keep Your Arms and Legs Inside the Reading at All Times!"

So yeah. Get up, walk away, turn around and look at the spread.

And who cares what the sitter thinks!

[Karenwhe]

Must take my hat off - excellent spread !!!!!!!

[Rhiannon]

That is terrific, Umbrae! I really like this and I can see how important this could be in figuring out what's going on in a particular relationship. I will defintely invest the time to learn this.

R

P.S. Can we use it for our NEXT calendar?

[mooncat2]

Thank you Umbrae,

This is just the spread I need , right now.

[zander770]

. . . impressive, isn't it? let's see how well it works (next time i get an "relationship" querery...which'll be in the next 30 minutes, i'm sure)!

leat,

~Z~770

[Kazz]

Wow Umbrae....thankyou for sharing this spead!

I will try it out and let you know


Cheers
Kazz

[Karenwhe]

Tried it .............. it is painfully accurage and very insightful...........VERY GOOD !

Thanks again for the spread Umbrae.

[Trogon]

Originally posted by Umbrae
(snip) So looking at the two outside columns separately, they tend to indicate Feel – Need – Result. However they also simultaneously represent P-P-F; AND baggage brought into the relationship, (They are read downward); simultaneously, but not really. You have to look at the cards and allow them to read themselves to you, let them tell you, “Hey! This is a need issue”, or “Hey, I’m a Fear”. Hopes and needs are similar.

Umbrae... this looks like an excellent spread (now that I've finally gotten around to really looking at it... ). I am a little curious about one thing you said - "However they also simultaneously represent P-P-F." I don't mean to sound too obtuse... but what is P-P-F?

This has gone into my notebook... thanks for sharing.

[edited to add]

Doh!!! Never mind... duh... Past-Present-Future. I get a little dense by the end of my shift sometimes...

[LeahG]

Originally posted by Umbrae
Y

I have used this spread for years...with excellent results.

It is well worth investing the time to learn it.

Hi Umbrae - quick question.....what order do you lay out the cards?

Ta

[Umbrae]

Right hand column (top down)

Left hand column (top down)

Center Column (top down)