Who to believe?

So, a few months ago, I got a tarot reading from someone else (a professional reader). The reader was doing spreads and came up with the same cards that I was getting but she was interpreting them waaay differently than I was doing in my own spreads (I have RW, she was using Angel Oracle, I think) for example, she pulled the Strength card and started talking to me about having the Archangel Ariel on my side. However, in RW that card has a very specific and proven meaning for me. Given MY meaning, if she saw that card as a positive power for me, that would have changed the ENTIRE reading/situation. We only "agreed" on one card...
In a situation like that, who do you believe, yourself who may be biased or someone else who interprets it way different and ascribes meanings that are different than the way you see them. I realize that you are going to someone else because you want their take but some stuff was questionable but other stuff was right on the money...and I also think that some of the answers to questions/advice that I was being given were what I needed to hear rather than what was really true (she was also a medium) because some of that advice I absolutely would not take but it made me realize how urgent the situation was so that I sprang into action and got myself out of a damaging situation. Anyhow - dillema. What do you guys think?

Silverbells said:

Given MY meaning, if she saw that card as a positive power for me, that would have changed the ENTIRE reading/situation. We only "agreed" on one card...

Click to expand...

As nicely as I can put this - IMHO - when you go to have someone else do your reading LET THEM DO THE READING FOR YOU. Do not kibitz or kvetch with them about 'you interpret this card differently than I do' kind of stuff. That will tend to make the reader think you are quizzing them or sizing them up.

Do your interpretation of their reading yourself - after - later. NO one wants to be doing a reading and then find out they are in a 'dueling interpretation' scenario...in fact - that's kind of rude.

Everyone interprets cards differently, especially when using different decks. If you want a reader to tell you exactly what you would see in the cards then you may as well do your own readings. I believe the universe has sent you to a specific reader for a reason - so be open, listen and do not critique what they say. I think it's disrespectful to question a reader.

For you, I think it's a case of doing more research on who you're seeing. It sounds as though a good psychic (someone who doesn't use cards) might be a better option for you, or someone who doesn't use angel cards/oracles.

tarotbear said:

As nicely as I can put this - IMHO - when you go to have someone else do your reading LET THEM DO THE READING FOR YOU. Do not kibitz or kvetch with them about 'you interpret this card differently than I do' kind of stuff. That will tend to make the reader think you are quizzing them or sizing them up.

Do your interpretation of their reading yourself - after - later. NO one wants to be doing a reading and then find out they are in a 'dueling interpretation' scenario...in fact - that's kind of rude.

Click to expand...

Hi tarotbear - well, Good Lord, I didn't say anything at the time; I thought of it later and was like..."what?" When I say we '"agreed" on one card, I mean I vibed with her interpretation. I agree, that would have been incredibly rude and I would even say that if I went in there with that attitude, it might have been the very cause of the "incorrect" info being given.

TarotVisions said:

For you, I think it's a case of doing more research on who you're seeing. It sounds as though a good psychic (someone who doesn't use cards) might be a better option for you, or someone who doesn't use angel cards/oracles.

Click to expand...

Hi TarotVisions - that might be a a better option so that I don't mix my thoughts with someone else (in a matter of speaking). I did appreciate her, though, she helped me immensely and she was trained in the "allopathic" as well as the more esoteric.


What got me stuck was that she gave me a "medium" message with some advice that anyone who knew me at all would KNOW that I would NEVER take. I was in a crisis situation and I think that if I was given any other advice I might have remained in the situation and deteriorated but I was so horrified by the suggestion that I got it together REALLY quick (and now I realize how much in danger I was really in)...it wasn't true advice but it was what I needed to hear. That makes me wonder, was I being given interpretation of the cards that I "needed to hear"? And I wonder if others had had a similar experience.

Silverbells, it worries me when people seek out readers when they're in a crisis situation. I think a helpline or professional therapist, etc, may be more appropriate. All it takes is for some dodgy reader to come along and tell you everything you want to hear resulting in you clinging to a certain outcome and making things worse. Unless you have found a reader that you 100% trust I would take everything with a pinch of salt.

TarotVisions said:

Silverbells, it worries me when people seek out readers when they're in a crisis situation. I think a helpline or professional therapist, etc, may be more appropriate. All it takes is for some dodgy reader to come along and tell you everything you want to hear resulting in you clinging to a certain outcome and making things worse. Unless you have found a reader that you 100% trust I would take everything with a pinch of salt.

Click to expand...

Thank you TarotVisions, I never really considered that, I just went straight to my comfort zone...you know, I have long had it in my mind (from experience) that therapists and these sorts of medical personnel don't consider belief systems or take them seriously as an integrated part of people's lives - that people actually live their every part of their lives and outlook according to "unorthodox" beliefs. The western world can't seem to comprehend spirituality as a lifestyle rather than as just a tacked-on belief. That being the case, how can they help properly. You are correct though, it is probably best to go to a trained therapist because while they may not be able to address your situation properly, they can give you pretty astute observations that you can pick through and reconcile with your beliefs and therefore help yourself much better. There IS definitely a danger there not just in someone lying (and the consequences) in a crisis but in clinging to comfort rather than going through the process of self-healing. It can definitely take you away from yourself.
By the bye, I didn't follow her advice to do something I was uncomfortable with or take her interpretations and make life decisions (destroying relationships etc) based on them. Some of the things she told me were alarming but I'm a sort-of "show me the money" kind of person so basically if you don't tell me what I already know deep down...well, "thanks for your input", kind of thing and then I'll worry that the other alarming things that you said were true (what an odd way to go about things)...You are quite right TarotVisions, a trained therapist is probably the way to go.

With all of that, though, she still came up with the same cards that I was coming up with so something was on track. I need to think about and decide how I primarily view tarot and then I will probably have a better idea of how these things could happen.

Trust in you intuition and instincts. That is what you have them for!
Don't defend yourself. You are ok just as you are. It does not seem you take anything personally. That's a good thing.

I would not trust in most trained therapist. How many words are in therapist?
Scary isn't it?

I have always found that if you have to go outside of any relationship to look for an answer through someone or something else the relationship is not worth having. You can not fix anyone but yourself.


And most people want a tarot reading when they are in a crisis situation, or changing jobs, or in a rut or are going through a terrible relationship with a jerk. I never heard of anyone saying, "I am so in love with my life, my career and everyone I know. Can I have a reading?" When does that happen?

Briar Rose said:

Trust in you intuition and instincts. That is what you have them for!
Don't defend yourself. You are ok just as you are. It does not seem you take anything personally. That's a good thing.

I would not trust in most trained therapist. How many words are in therapist?
Scary isn't it?

I have always found that if you have to go outside of any relationship to look for an answer through someone or something else the relationship is not worth having. You can not fix anyone but yourself.


And most people want a tarot reading when they are in a crisis situation, or changing jobs, or in a rut or are going through a terrible relationship with a jerk. I never heard of anyone saying, "I am so in love with my life, my career and everyone I know. Can I have a reading?" When does that happen?

Click to expand...

Crisis indicates a really series/urgent dilemma, not just 'job or love troubles'. It would be pretty irresponsible to not suggest seeing someone with professional training if in fact Silverbells was in crisis. I don't think trusting in your intuition is going to cut it if someone, say, was in a life or death situation... this is usually what crisis means. Just saying...

***We all come from different backgrounds so the advice given may not be correct or what you want to hear but its up to you whether you act on the advice given or not. So going to anyone for advice is always kind of pot-luck. When we go to another person for advice, we relate our problem but they cannot fully understand the intricacies of our dilemma unless they have actually lived through it or can psychically connect with you.

But sometimes another person can see the future ramifications whereas you can't because your head is to befuddled with the problem, therefore what you 'think" you see in the cards is incorrect and the reader is correct.

Anyway, when having a reading and you feel the reader is "wrong" then simply ask them to enlarge upon what they have said, don't argue but always supply as much information as possible to ensure the reader understands your problem fully.

I never accept to do a reading unless the querent has a specific question(s) in mind and I like to discuss the reading as I go along to ensure clarity of answer.

Hello Everyone,
I disappeared from this thread without warning about a year ago and I wanted to come back and reply to everyone. I'm sorry that I did that. It seemed inconsiderate, and ungrateful, I know, but I thought about it often and always meant to come back. I just needed to crawl back under my log (that is often the case).

Briar Rose , thank you for your response. You are quite right that I should have been investing in my own intuition and instincts. As I had said before - I do not want someone's opinion, which is what I think one gets from a therapist. In the end, I was able to extricate myself with some very fancy & hard footwork. It was where my intuition and instincts were guiding me. BTW what you say about a relationship being not worth having if one has to seek answers from a third party is something that everyone should think about. It really puts things into perspective. I think that sometimes, someone's input might be valuable but ultimately, relationships are about types of intimacy. If you are constantly having to open the bubble of your intimacy to let someone/something else in because things are crappy and you don't know why then perhaps just burst that crappy bubble. Thank you for that insight


Midnight , thank you also for your response. I was indeed experiencing a crisis and certainly if someone is in that condition, they do need to be pointed toward serious help from someone who knows what they are doing. If I knew that someone was in that condition, I would immediately get outside sources involved. In reference to trained professionals in my particular circumstances however, I don't think that there was anyone to help me to do what needed doing in the way that it needing doing - I am no longer the type of person who wants to sit around with a therapist who does not know me and listen to what I feel are inane questions or observations and I am also not open to chemical intervention. That being the case, there was only one road open to me: follow my instincts, build on them to make decisions, and start walking in the direction I wanted to go.
Incidentally, the tarot reader in question was also a trained therapist (though I was not seeing her in that capacity), in that context, a case can be made for her having been negligent in not trying to get me to someone but on the other hand, her intuition may have kicked in strongly and told her not to.

Willowfox Thank you for your response. I have found that when going for readings in the past, it did seem very difficult for the reader to connect with me and they would sometimes stop and ask me to be more open...this has resulted in at least one horrendously inaccurate reading for me. I couldn't believe the inaccuracies that were flying. As someone who has gotten both good bad and middling tarot/medium readings, I can say this, depending on the reader and they're abilities, it is definitely a truism when people say that both people must consent to it. I think that sometimes I have trouble consenting and that causes problems. That "inner" consent issue seems like it could be alleviated through requiring a specific question to be asked, rather than something vague and unformed...

Thank you all so much for coming in and giving your input. The whole situation was DRASTIC and still, I do not seem to be done with my "Tower moment" thing but I can see the changes that have been for the best, and hopefully I will begin to see the reason for the emotional turmoil side of it...