I feel like giving up the Tarot

celticnoodle

(((SelenaGomez))) So sorry for your loss.

And, yes, it can be all the reasons already posted here above. I think you need to give yourself some time and be patient with yourself.

Also, instead of throwing your Voyager deck away, why not trade it for a deck that might excite you more? Lots of people here on AT who are willing to exchange decks.

Sometimes just a short break away from the cards is in order. I've done this myself a few times, when life has gotten very busy, my health was bad and when I've just been up to my ears with other life things.

Also, while it can be just as good getting a reading online as it is face to face, it has to be the right person. Perhaps the people whom you went to just were not that good.

However, I would recommend finding a reader who will read for you face to face. Perhaps the reader you have experience with is the best bet for you at this time. But, even if that reading isn't what you're hoping for--just take a break for awhile and give yourself some time to heal from your loss.

((:)heart:)))
 

Miss Woo

celticnoodle said:
(((SelenaGomez))) So sorry for your loss.

And, yes, it can be all the reasons already posted here above. I think you need to give yourself some time and be patient with yourself.

Also, instead of throwing your Voyager deck away, why not trade it for a deck that might excite you more? Lots of people here on AT who are willing to exchange decks.

Sometimes just a short break away from the cards is in order. I've done this myself a few times, when life has gotten very busy, my health was bad and when I've just been up to my ears with other life things.

Also, while it can be just as good getting a reading online as it is face to face, it has to be the right person. Perhaps the people whom you went to just were not that good.

However, I would recommend finding a reader who will read for you face to face. Perhaps the reader you have experience with is the best bet for you at this time. But, even if that reading isn't what you're hoping for--just take a break for awhile and give yourself some time to heal from your loss.

((:)heart:)))
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Thanks very much :)

I think the first person wasn't any good but the second (the one from today) was good. In fact, I get the feeling she is *very* good and it was just my state of mind that made me respond to the reading that way.

I think it must be my Sun in the 12th House... Death and grief seem to be a constant theme in my life.
 

Miss Woo

One thing that does make me excited is that I'm going to have an Aries boyfriend. I'm so happy! I have always wanted an Aries boyfriend! :D
 

danieljuk

oh Selena, sorry you are still mourning over your pug! well for some people at bad times in their life they take a total break! but for other people its really healing! I came back to tarot during a major bad mental health period and it gave me hope and healing. Some people though just can't use it in those bad times and also the tarot tells us what we need to know, not what we want to know! it's a risk!

time heals our losses but many people mourn the loss of their pets for a long time. You will heal and feel better sometime in future but it takes time. When I lost my Spaniel some years ago, I found the internet helpful. There is webpages about the grief process. Knowing the different stages really helped me, it's a natural thing we go through! Also there is pages where you can place a memorial for them and also communities where they support people who are in mourning. Maybe they can help you heal or you can realise that this happens to many of us. this is one site, you can post a memorial there if it helps you.

Then the decision to make is do you want to have a break from tarot and divination or not? you could have a total rest for maybe 6 months and see how you feel!

if you choose not to have a break, remember tarot can be healing. There is a lovely simple spread which is for anxiety really but fits here. it's 3 cards, what will help you, what makes things worse, something new. Some people meditate on cards like the sun card and the others.

Final suggestion, why not look for decks that are positive in theme? It's good to have decks which are light and shadows but also I think it's worth having one deck with uplifting messages when you need cheering up or some positivity. There is a thread about tarot decks that are positive here (obviously 'positive' is subjective). Doreen Virtue is a controversial figure on the forum but she publishes angel decks which give positive messages and they are good for an uplifting message but people argue they are not good for an overall balanced reading. She has a tarot deck and many oracles! when I was really depressed I pulled a "daily guidance from the angels" oracle card from that deck and it gave me a positive message every day! there is other positive oracles too like Earth Magic and Osho Zen (tarot) which are uplifting too! It depends on your belief system but there is many oracles with nice messages. perhaps you need something that cheers you up for a while :) :heart:
 

jolie_amethyst

((hugs))

I'll say something others haven't yet: this may have little to do with Tarot, and everything to do with your grief having become full blown depression. Yes, it happens, even over the death of a beloved pet rather than a person. For some of us, our pets ARE people!

At four months and still in the "violent sobbing for an hour" stage is about the point where red flags start coming up that instead of processing this grief, your mind has allowed it to become entrenched. Loss of interest in hobbies or former passions is a huge red flag when combined with the first. I've been there...more than once, and it may be that instead of seeking a professional reading, it's time to seek another professional opinion: that of a doctor or therapist (or both).

Shadowscapes, as I said in your other thread, is a very gentle deck, and perhaps it will help. I truly hope it does. But it's not going to change much if the real problem here is depression.
 

Miss Woo

jolie_amethyst said:
((hugs))

I'll say something others haven't yet: this may have little to do with Tarot, and everything to do with your grief having become full blown depression. Yes, it happens, even over the death of a beloved pet rather than a person. For some of us, our pets ARE people!

At four months and still in the "violent sobbing for an hour" stage is about the point where red flags start coming up that instead of processing this grief, your mind has allowed it to become entrenched. Loss of interest in hobbies or former passions is a huge red flag when combined with the first. I've been there...more than once, and it may be that instead of seeking a professional reading, it's time to seek another professional opinion: that of a doctor or therapist (or both).

Shadowscapes, as I said in your other thread, is a very gentle deck, and perhaps it will help. I truly hope it does. But it's not going to change much if the real problem here is depression.
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Thanks for your concern but I'm not still in the 'violent sobbing for an hour stage'... I've barely cried about my Pug until now and this is the first time I have really let go. It felt good, like a release. I think I might have become depressed if I hadn't done that.

Also, the other night I laughed out loud when I remembered something funny he did and that made me feel good, like I'm doing okay with my grief. I think it's a positive sign. And I haven't lost interest in any of my hobbies; in fact I haven't felt this passionate and alive in a long time. I really love my life!

Also, it's possible that I was having an anniversary reaction because yesterday was my birthday. I'm not depressed; I'm just grieving and this is my way of expressing it. Grief is a very individual thing :)

Anyway, I'm glad that I cried and finally got in touch with my feelings. There's nothing wrong... It's a good thing, it's psychologically healthy and part of the healing process. I feel like it has moved whatever was blocking me. I feel good now and I'm okay :)

eta

Also, I don't have pathological, or complicated, grief because I had that when my partner died and I know what it's like. I felt I needed to see a psychologist twice a week for 18 months.

And depression is a normal stage of grief. It's only when it becomes prolonged that it's a problem.
 

Miss Woo

danieljuk said:
oh Selena, sorry you are still mourning over your pug! well for some people at bad times in their life they take a total break! but for other people its really healing! I came back to tarot during a major bad mental health period and it gave me hope and healing. Some people though just can't use it in those bad times and also the tarot tells us what we need to know, not what we want to know! it's a risk!

time heals our losses but many people mourn the loss of their pets for a long time. You will heal and feel better sometime in future but it takes time. When I lost my Spaniel some years ago, I found the internet helpful. There is webpages about the grief process. Knowing the different stages really helped me, it's a natural thing we go through! Also there is pages where you can place a memorial for them and also communities where they support people who are in mourning. Maybe they can help you heal or you can realise that this happens to many of us. this is one site, you can post a memorial there if it helps you.

Then the decision to make is do you want to have a break from tarot and divination or not? you could have a total rest for maybe 6 months and see how you feel!

if you choose not to have a break, remember tarot can be healing. There is a lovely simple spread which is for anxiety really but fits here. it's 3 cards, what will help you, what makes things worse, something new. Some people meditate on cards like the sun card and the others.

Final suggestion, why not look for decks that are positive in theme? It's good to have decks which are light and shadows but also I think it's worth having one deck with uplifting messages when you need cheering up or some positivity. There is a thread about tarot decks that are positive here (obviously 'positive' is subjective). Doreen Virtue is a controversial figure on the forum but she publishes angel decks which give positive messages and they are good for an uplifting message but people argue they are not good for an overall balanced reading. She has a tarot deck and many oracles! when I was really depressed I pulled a "daily guidance from the angels" oracle card from that deck and it gave me a positive message every day! there is other positive oracles too like Earth Magic and Osho Zen (tarot) which are uplifting too! It depends on your belief system but there is many oracles with nice messages. perhaps you need something that cheers you up for a while :) :heart:
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Thanks very much for your help :)

I will have a think about if I need a break or not. That is a good idea.

Thanks for the anxiety spread; I might do that one day.

I have decided that I'm going to see a counsellor about my guilt about my Pug's death. I have already joined a pet loss forum; and I have discovered that it is surprisingly common for people to feel guilty when losing a pet and it is a normal part of the grieving process.

Thanks for the recommendation for the oracles, Osho Zen etc. You have been very generous and helpful :)

eta

Also, that is a good idea about finding out about the stages of grief. I have forgotten what they are. I have a feeling that I'm just entering the stage of acceptance.
 

UrbanBramble

Sorry to hear about your loss! Going through the loss of a pet is really hard. They are family.

In regards to tarot, it seems like maybe taking a new approach would be helpful?... for me I hardly use the cards for prediction, I use them to help better understand my emotional and spiritual self. You could get a deck that feels like it speaks to you on that level and practice readings that are less predictive and more about what's going on inside of you. There are tons of spreads for exploring the emotional, the Shadow, etc. You can also just use them for meditation if that's something you do.

Just a thought.
 

Miss Woo

UrbanBramble said:
Sorry to hear about your loss! Going through the loss of a pet is really hard. They are family.

In regards to tarot, it seems like maybe taking a new approach would be helpful?... for me I hardly use the cards for prediction, I use them to help better understand my emotional and spiritual self. You could get a deck that feels like it speaks to you on that level and practice readings that are less predictive and more about what's going on inside of you. There are tons of spreads for exploring the emotional, the Shadow, etc. You can also just use them for meditation if that's something you do.

Just a thought.
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Yes, that's a good idea... I'm just going to use my Shadowscapes deck for card of the day readings and other psychological stuff. I used to own the Jungian Tarot deck but I'm not sure what happened to it.
 

Grizabella

Barleywine said:
I dropped out for a number of years, not from any lack of faith but due to work and family commitments. I came back with greatly renewed enthusiasm, so it wouldn't be fatal to your long-term interest if you did that. Regarding your readings, I'm of the old school that believes the best readings come from two people being at a reading table together and personally interacting, where further explanation for any unclear meanings can be jointly pursued. I doubt I will ever give or get an on-line reading. Maybe you need to find a "live one" and give that a try.
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I agree that the best readings of all are live ones. I woudln't totally discount the two online readings you've had because sometimes things will occur further on down the road and you'll be surprised. But even if not, maybe a live reading would be good for you.

Second best would be a reading by Skype or live chat. Especially if you can use a webcam.

SelenaGomez said:
I can't do a reading exchange on AT because I couldn't offer one in return. I have no ability to predict the future, and I barely understand my own cards!
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In the reading exchange, all you need to do is provide detailed feedback to the person who did your reading. Sometimes readers want a reading in exchange but others only want feedback. You might want to give that a try.
 
Giving away a deck with 1 card missing. What do you think? I Can't Read You