Can I be the odd one out here and openly admit that I don't know you? I'm only an ickle baby in this forum
On a more sympathetic note, I lost my grandfather last year and my grandmother the year before, so I know what you are going through. It's hard to let go, especially when they've had a big impact on your life, and it never seems to get easier. But I learned that you have to remember one thing: death is just a spiritual version of moving house, the next stage of life. And I am sure that if he can find some way, he will still be watching over you, acting as a guardian and advisor, just like the Fae.
I always like to end my more downbeat posts on a ligghter note, so here goes:
I want to die peacfully in my sleep like my uncle.
Not screaming in fear like his passengers.
Hope that helps. As a famous man said (all right, it was the Joker in Batman
) A joke a day keeps the gloom away.
If the joke upsets anyone, I'll remove it. It's just meant to be a harless bit of fun.