Refusing to read

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Amen. I can relate Grizabella.

Ravynangel, I haven't noticed any difference in the people or questions I get based on what deck or tools I use. I use angel tarot quite a bit & get the same questions with that one as with other 'regular' tarot decks, or oracle decks. I've had a couple of people who didn't say they or the other person were married, but the cards pointed at it. This was my first person who openly admitted and asked specifically about the cheating relationship. And was obviously not happy with what I told her. Yes, it's fun, it's exciting, it's a delicious whirlwind, however... :\ Last I heard, nothing's changed. But I knew it wouldn't. *shrug* I always tell myself, We can only give the information, what they chose to do (or not do) with it is for them to decide. or, as my husband puts it: Not my circus, not my monkeys lol

Lots of times it IS my circus and my monkeys, though! LOL

Just kidding, but it reminds me of the days when I was raising a bunch of little kids. My circus, my monkeys!

Ruya said:

Amen. I can relate Grizabella.

Ravynangel, I haven't noticed any difference in the people or questions I get based on what deck or tools I use. I use angel tarot quite a bit & get the same questions with that one as with other 'regular' tarot decks, or oracle decks. I've had a couple of people who didn't say they or the other person were married, but the cards pointed at it. This was my first person who openly admitted and asked specifically about the cheating relationship. And was obviously not happy with what I told her. Yes, it's fun, it's exciting, it's a delicious whirlwind, however... :\ Last I heard, nothing's changed. But I knew it wouldn't. *shrug* I always tell myself, We can only give the information, what they chose to do (or not do) with it is for them to decide. or, as my husband puts it: Not my circus, not my monkeys lol

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I've turned some readings down,and gone to ridiculous lengths to avoid some clients who wanted to be returning. Some people just drive me crazy no matter how professional i try to be...and after all these years, I really am professional.
Still, some can get to me.
I think this is probably very human, fallible, and real.
It's easy to judge others, but then I look back on my own mistakes and shudder.

But there are still (and always)some people I will do almost anything to avoid reading for!

magpie9 said:

I've turned some readings down,and gone to ridiculous lengths to avoid some clients who wanted to be returning. Some people just drive me crazy no matter how professional i try to be...and after all these years, I really am professional.
Still, some can get to me.
I think this is probably very human, fallible, and real.
It's easy to judge others, but then I look back on my own mistakes and shudder.

But there are still (and always)some people I will do almost anything to avoid reading for!

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I know what you mean. There have been some who I just don't want to read for again if I can avoid it. As unbiased as I try to be, there just are "those" sometimes. And sometimes those are the ones who want the most readings, so they become regular customers and finally I just have to be "too booked up" to squeeze them in anymore.

Ruya said:

Wondering if you've ever refused to read for someone you didn't like and how you handled it? Or if you accepted their money and did the reading as best you could & ignored any personal feelings?

So far, I've only refused to read for one person and that was because they were drunk. In a couple of weeks I'm doing readings for one day during a 3 day event. There will be some women attending this event that I've had unpleasant dealings with in the past. They're the sort who tend toward self-created drama (to then play the 'victim'), and I wouldn't put it past any one of them to plop down in my chair for a reading. I truly don't know how I'd respond if this happens. I'd appreciate any thoughts or advice.

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Yes. And I don't read in person. It's rare but it's happened. Although not with a paying client, I just told them I was too busy to do it.

I have also refused to read at times on questions that felt inappropriate, in that case I tell them that and exactly why.

But yeah, I can see your problem. In person is more complicated. When you are sitting right there doing readings and one of these women comes up, you can't very well say you are too busy to do readings right now.

I guess the best you can do is to be honest, although that will take courage and just tell them that the energy between you that was generated in the past is not conducive to you being able to do them a good reading, so you had better bow out. I presume if there was unpleasantness between you , they ought to know that. So it should not come as a big surprise hopefully. But if that is how you feel, you shouldn't have to read for them.

Babs

I refused to read for a friend for a long time. Her life was rather messy and as a friend, I was being the shoulder to cry on. I suspected Tarot would be far more honest!

She kept asking, until it got really awkward. So I gave in. I tried very hard not to put my own opinion into it - it wasn't hard actually because the cards were pretty clear. Love of material things blinding her to other things. Husband under stress and thinking of an affair. . . health risks due to strain he was under to earn the cash she felt made her happy.

She listened to the reading and said it was "very interesting" and never mentioned it again! Her husband later had heart trouble and her spending habits have changed, and we are still friends. But the reading is never mentioned!

Ruya said:

Wondering if you've ever refused to read for someone you didn't like and how you handled it?

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I wasn't aware there were many people I don't like that would be beating a path to my door for readings.

I read mostly for members of the public and for forum members here. I don't dislike any of them.

I refused to read for a readings addict once, and gave her the lecture about needing to do some real-world work one her situation. I refused to read for a drunken fisherman once.

He was funny. He wandered into the shop where I was reading in a coastal town in the morning, slapped a handful of notes on my table, and told me to tell him what he was going to catch that day. I gave him back his money and told him I didn't need my cards to tell me that he was going to catch a hangover, catch a case of sunstroke, and catch the sharp edge of his wife's tongue. His mate came and dragged him out, apologising for him. Several hours later when I was packing up, his friend came back in, still sober, to tell me I was an awesome reader: he had in fact got even drunker in the boat (hangover tomorrow), fallen asleep in the sun (sunstroke) and was even now sitting in the car terrified to go home (sharp edge of wife's tongue). So satisfying!

Or if you accepted their money and did the reading as best you could & ignored any personal feelings?

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Why would you have personal feelings about strangers? After half an hour of reading cards for them, you get to see the inside of their life anyway, as it looks and feels to them - it becomes very difficult to dislike people when you start to know their inner world. We are all just struggling to get by the best way we know how.

There will be some women attending this event that I've had unpleasant dealings with in the past. They're the sort who tend toward self-created drama (to then play the 'victim'), and I wouldn't put it past any one of them to plop down in my chair for a reading. I truly don't know how I'd respond if this happens.

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Just be professional. Smile warmly and do a reading. You'll find that they are just human beings, too. Have some compassion.

Loved your story about the fisherman, Nisaba!

If I had a gut feeling not to read for a certain person, I'd follow it. But that's never happened to me yet. In principle, I believe Tarot readers have a right to say "no," but it's up to each reader to decide where the boundaries are and how they will handle it.