Agreeing to a tarot reading - the person goes for someone else

I've been doing tarot readings for a small while at this one forum.

There's been a few incidents of which I've not been too happy about.


The first one was that a person was asking for a tarot reading from person x.

The person did this reading, which was short but quite detailed (maybe even a bit too detailed in my opinion), and the querent thanked him.

The very next day, the person came again to the forum, this time asking a reading from me. It's like he or she didn't appreciate the given tarot reading at all and decided to just head for the next one.


I don't like this, I feel like the person has insulted the previous reader, and I would like to answer this person that I will refuse to read to him/her because of the already mentioned reasons (him/her not respecting the previous reader)



The second incident happened when I had agreed to a tarot reading for this one person. However, due to me heading for a weekend trip and not being in front of a computer (I do like to do the tarot readings in the tranquillity of my home), I decided to arrange the reading for the next week. I informed this person and he/she happily agreed, and bid me a good weekend.

However, when I returned to the forum today, I noticed that the same person had asked a reading from a different tarot reader.
The reader had already answered, giving a quite long and detailed reading.

I know that it's hard to be kept in waiting and that it's the interntet - it's easy to turn for another reader (and I don't mind the concept of someone turning for another reader, they are free to do as they want) but I don't feel like wanting to read to this specific person anymore - after he/she had already received the reading from another person.

- Yes, I know that I had promised him/her, but she/he has already had the reading from someone else (the person asked the very same questions from this other reader). Be in mind that the readings I do in the forum are free of charge. I do them just to become better and better at readings, and also to help people in their troubles.

- I still realize I could read to him/her, but what if I get completely different outcomes? What if my reading comes actually wrong? Of course it would be quite fascinating if my reading would turn out to be more correct than the other one's, but generally speaking I don't like this kind of competition, where different tarot readers do readings for the same person publically. (this would happen if the incident #1 would happen to me and the other reader would agree to do another reading for the same person, perhaps receiving different outcomes than me. So maybe it's only a matter of time.)


What are your opinions on this matter? This is a subject which deeply concerns me..

RE:

Oh and by the way, I do realize that by posting my tarot readings here, to the tarotforum.net, I let my readings be analyzed critically by this community.

This is completely fine by me, as it makes me see my readings in a different way and develops me to a better reader.

But when it's about querents and my public reputation as a tarot reader at this other forum, it's a bit complicated..

If you only read for people who don't ask questions multiple times, you will probably be limiting your clientele severely (because most people DO ask the same or similar questions mre than once)--but you certainly do have the right to do that if you want.

I'm pretty laissez-faire about such things--I don't love to read for Janie who has asked twenty times if the man who ditched her after she got pregnant will return to her, but if Janie seeks me out and asks me to read for her, I probably will. Who am I to judge? Maybe I'll be the one to give her the reading that finally lets her accept that he won't.

As for the second incident--your reading may be different, it may be similar, who knows? Just as the client changed her mind about whether she could wait, the situation may have changed between the two readings. It happens.

In a free forum especially, who you do or don't read for is up to you. Your choices will probably have consequences down the line, and that's up to everyone involved. The consequence of my attitude, for example, is that I sometimes get pestered by demanding, one-way people. But I can always adjust and set new boundaries and new rules. So too can you. Good luck with whatever you decide.

annabel398 said:

If you only read for people who don't ask questions multiple times, you will probably be limiting your clientele severely (because most people DO ask the same or similar questions mre than once)--but you certainly do have the right to do that if you want.

I'm pretty laissez-faire about such things--I don't love to read for Janie who has asked twenty times if the man who ditched her after she got pregnant will return to her, but if Janie seeks me out and asks me to read for her, I probably will. Who am I to judge? Maybe I'll be the one to give her the reading that finally lets her accept that he won't.

As for the second incident--your reading may be different, it may be similar, who knows? Just as the client changed her mind about whether she could wait, the situation may have changed between the two readings. It happens.

In a free forum especially, who you do or don't read for is up to you. Your choices will probably have consequences down the line, and that's up to everyone involved. The consequence of my attitude, for example, is that I sometimes get pestered by demanding, one-way people. But I can always adjust and set new boundaries and new rules. So too can you. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Click to expand...

Thank you for your answer. It did give me some thought.

I decided to give it a go, but I did make some rules.

For example, there was this one person who, after I did a long reading for her, demanded more information about it.

I tried to make a second reading, but I just couldn't make any of it anymore. It seemed like I already had all the necessary information about it. I had become "saturated".

So I answered to the lady, saying that the answers are already in the cards, and did a keyword summary about the information that had raised up during the first reading.

This gave clearance to the lady (maybe my first reading for her was actually a bit too complex, and she didn't get it the first time). When I summarized the whole thing, it became clear for her and she was thankful in the end.

AT has many series sitters who jump on most any reading thread offered. Which is legal.

What you need to do for yourself (and many do) is when you make the offer for readings specify who you will read for.
Anyone who hasn't had a reading in the last two weeks or month is a good one.
(excluding moderated reading circles of course)

Think twice before doing a long involved reading for a yes or no question.
If this is what they ask, draw one card, read it as a yes or no, and move on.

If it is a involved question, often with three queries in one sentence, ask them to clarify what they want.

good luck and keep reading, it's lots of fun! And welcome to AT, we love new members!

I have done some readings on here and then seen the person asking the question or same topic all over here. It is really upsetting but really it's their problem not yours! you did a reading to the best of your ability on the topic. Now they don't have faith or trust in that reading. Maybe you told them something new or it's an issue that is very dear to them. However to keep asking over and over doesn't help, they will get different outcomes in the readings! But that is not our problem!

Same with if someone chooses someone else. Both these things are disrespectful but we can't control people's actions. Don't take it personally, concentrate on the people who you do a reading for and they tell you that it was very important to them or you got something perfectly, they are the people to care about

AJ said:

AT has many series sitters who jump on most any reading thread offered. Which is legal.

What you need to do for yourself (and many do) is when you make the offer for readings specify who you will read for.
Anyone who hasn't had a reading in the last two weeks or month is a good one.
(excluding moderated reading circles of course)

Think twice before doing a long involved reading for a yes or no question.
If this is what they ask, draw one card, read it as a yes or no, and move on.

If it is a involved question, often with three queries in one sentence, ask them to clarify what they want.

good luck and keep reading, it's lots of fun! And welcome to AT, we love new members!

Click to expand...

danieljuk said:

I have done some readings on here and then seen the person asking the question or same topic all over here. It is really upsetting but really it's their problem not yours! you did a reading to the best of your ability on the topic. Now they don't have faith or trust in that reading. Maybe you told them something new or it's an issue that is very dear to them. However to keep asking over and over doesn't help, they will get different outcomes in the readings! But that is not our problem!

Same with if someone chooses someone else. Both these things are disrespectful but we can't control people's actions. Don't take it personally, concentrate on the people who you do a reading for and they tell you that it was very important to them or you got something perfectly, they are the people to care about

Click to expand...

Thank you for your advices! I appreciate them. = )



But I have to admit, I have been getting a new kind of problem lately. [EDIT: None of this has been happening at the AT forum. All is good at AT!]

Since when I started doing readings, I've been getting more and more requests. I've had to ask some of these querents to wait while it's their turn.


The thing is, on multiple occasions it has happened that another reader has stepped in to the thread and said,

"Don't worry. I'll read for you.", continuing straight for the interpretation.


This is a bit invasive in my opinion, but what can I do? I've asked for the querents to wait, and then someone else stepped in.

I did originally give my promise to do the reading, so I've always still done it. But it is awkward as there's another intepretation straight before mine.



And actually, I may be partly to blame here..



In the beginning, when I decided to start doing readings, this same person was really popular at this certain forum, spanning dozen of threads dedicated to ask if this person could read for the querent.

So popular actually, that the person didn't have time (or motivation) to answer for all of them, leaving them in wait for eternal, without answering anything.

Sometimes the querent would bump the thread. Still, no answer.


I didn't really approve of this, so I kind of did the same thing as the person does now, only with a more humane approach - I stepped in to the thread, saying that "If you won't get an interpretation in the near future, I can read for you."

I think that this boosted the reader's motivation a little, and he/she started answering more for them (but it still happens).


So now it has come to the situation that there are unanswered threads dedicated for this reader, while the reader comes and reads for people who are waiting for my interpretation. Once a querent, who had waited forever for this reader, turned for me in the same thread, saying

"Bumping again, this time for [my nickname]."


It is a bit complex situation, I admit.

If I say something about it, he/she could very well just state, "Well you started it."

Meditarot said:

Thank you for your advices! I appreciate them. = )



But I have to admit, I have been getting a new kind of problem lately.

Since when I started doing readings, I've been getting more and more requests. I've had to ask some of these querents to wait while it's their turn.


The thing is, on multiple occasions it has happened that another reader has stepped in to the thread and said,

"Don't worry. I'll read for you.", continuing straight for the interpretation.


This is a bit invasive in my opinion, but what can I do? I've asked for the querents to wait, and then someone else stepped in.

Click to expand...

If this happens let the Reading Exchange moderators know.. It really isn't good to jump into someone else's thread. Wendywu and Chiska are the moderators of the Reading Exchange, they are very discreet and would want you to let them know of problems like this..

Sulis said:

If this happens let the Reading Exchange moderators know.. It really isn't good to jump into someone else's thread. Wendywu and Chiska are the moderators of the Reading Exchange, they are very discreet and would want you to let them know of problems like this..

Click to expand...

Sorry if I've been making myself unclear..

It's not the AT-forum where this has been happening, but another one altogether.

I've got nothing bad to say of AT : )

I have had a similar problem on another forum, with a particular member who tends to ask the same question of different readers. Once I gave her a detailed reading that I thought neatly answered her question. But later, I saw her asking the same question of a different reader in another thread. I felt a bit insulted, and I also felt like she was "shopping around" until she got the answer she wanted.

But after a few minutes of fuming, I thought the matter over and gained a little perspective. I am a new and inexperienced reader (of playing cards, which is what I use on that forum) and the answer I gave troubled her, so I couldn't really blame her if she wanted a second opinion. I still read for her often and we get along well, so I don't really feel like pushing the issue.

I've taken the whole thing as a learning experience. Now at least I know how not to act when I don't like the answer a reader gives me. If I want a second opinion, I'll read for myself. (If I knew any cartomancers in real life, I might also turn to them with my question, but alas I am alone ).