3 cups. 10 cups rx, queen wands rx + an affair

I was doing a reading for an older woman on the weekend. She has been married for over 30 years. The first card in the spread was the queen wands (Rx) and I was talking about the traits of this queen and mentioned that perhaps they were blocked a little and that she should search within the fullfill her full potential. And then it just jumped into my head. This woman does not have sex with her partner and hasnt for a very long time. Now I am new to tarot and I dont trust my intuition too much as yet so I buried that thought and continued.
A little way in the spread the 10Cups(RX) came up and I started saying "This card represents a happy marriage, permanence" and before I could continue she jumped in saying. Yes she knows this is for her. She has the best marriage ever and that she is very lucky and that when she has visited psychics in the past they always tell her how strong her marriage is.

Then comes the 3 cups which in this spread I was starting to think "hmmm 3 in a relationship?"

So as I was speaking I remembered that sometimes the Queen Wands (Rx) can mean infidelities in a relationship. And I think that with these other 2 cards this could be the case.
I looked her in the eye and met her confident smile and said nothing.

A - am I wrong about these cards?
B - was I wrong in saying nothing? I can almost answer this myself because I felt she would be SHATTERED and that she is the type of person who wouldnt believe it

Thanks
Free Flight

Do you think 10c R is a positive card? Upright i could see that, but when reversed there is something thrown in that changes the meaning in some way. In elemental dignity (i feel like a b@$t@rd bringing that up again), the queen of a fire suit next to water signs, prominant reversed one at that, would make this situation at little fiery and steam emerging (maybe not the good kind). Although there is some hindsight bias, i could definitely see how the 3c could mean a love triangle after the previous cards. I think tarotbear is going to say something, brace yourself As long as you didnt tell her it was a truth, or better yet kept it to yourself since you were unsure even a little, i dont think its bad that you stretched yourself trying to gain insight, and very intelligently so!

PS ill have your reading up in a little on my thread

Hi Rainwolf
No in my mind the 10c rx is not positive. I was about to say to her this is a card that means .... upright, but because it is reversed there are some blockages such as....but she never let me get a word in as she jumped in about how perfect it all is.

looking forward to the reading
FF

Oh ok, in context your reply sounded like you said it was positive...and i was like ''huh?!?'' Ill post it tomorrow morning when my headache goes away.

Maybe the queen wands R would mean refusing to see the truth; most know how the queen is upright....flip her over and she makes up what she wants to believe...

My opinion on this (I'm not saying it's right by the way, as I am learning more and more on these boards all the time!):-

If I saw QW rx I would think that I was being shown the side of a character that emerges during conflict.This woman's husband would be a "rock" in a time of crisis. BUT too much opposition (too many arguments) can make him jealous and deceitful with a nasty streak. And unfaithful. Interesting point you made about the "no sex" thing that popped into your head. Right way up, she (alone of all the queens) sits with her legs apart, signifying her sexual energy. So could rx position mean that this is blocked? I think you were spot on there.

10 Crx to me is a highly charged situation (such as a marriage/love affair) that has gone wrong. It can even signify domestic violence, although I'm sure you would have picked that up psychically.

And 3 of cups - pretty obvious given the other two cards. I think your overall assumption was right.

I don't think I would have come straight out and said it to her though. These situations require tact and a lot of beating about the bush, and you hope that they will understand what you trying to say!!! I probably would have said something like, "there have been argument and quarrels. There has been a problem in expressing your emtions (referring to the sex)" that kind of thing.

But, if you weren't sure of your interpretation, then I think you did the right thing is keeping quiet.

It would be interesting to give her another reading in a few weeks (if she is someone you know) and see what pops up then.

I think you were right not to tell her what you were seeing as being possible about an affair. I honestly don't think I'd be able to ethically tell someone I'd seen those things in a reading unless they had expressed concerns about the possibility themselves, and especially not if I wasn't close friends with the person I was reading for. I guess you could have asked if she had any concerns about her husband being unfaithful, even though she had rushed to say how good her marriage is. Maybe if you had asked if she were concerned, then you could have drawn further cards to help her deal with her feelings and insecurities about it if she'd confessed to being concerned, but I surely still don't see how I could tell someone I saw that their husband was unfaithful in the cards.

Rainwolf - LOL!!!

My first reading as a paid public reader dealt with an affair - and I was dead-on!

{Still chuckling over Rainwolf's reaction!!!}

Without knowing exactly where the three cards came up, or how close they were to each other, I am guessing. But the Queen Swords Rx is a card about uncontrolled actions and reactions - the Queen has fallen on her sword and that makes her manic. It says 'WATCH OUT! Uncontrolled bitchery is in the air!' If this was the first card of a large spread such as CC, it forebodes problems from within being externalized, sometimes in physical forms. The Ten Cups RX 'a little further' into the spread foretells big, unhappy events of extremely emotional natures. Where the Three cups comes in is a matter of timing. It could also represent a marraige counselor stepping in as much as an affair.

Without the rest of the spread, it is quite possible to see her marraige is possibly reflected in these cards, and to 'see' an affair possibly tied it to it. However, IMHO, your desire to remain silent was probably the best thing you could have done, although I would (as tactfully as possible - yes - even TB can be tactful during a blue moon) have mentioned that there seemed to be some kind of extreme emotional event in the future (to prepare her for it's possibility) , and also mentioned that the Three Cups also does represent a 'healing' - so possibly there would be someone or something to help deal with the 'problem.' {If others have told her she has a sturdy marriage, seeing the third person as the troublemaker could be an error}. Once again - never plant the seeds of doubt in an Querent's mind (think "Othello"), or she might start looking for signs of an affair that isn't there.

{Side note - in the famous reading that outed TB as a reader: the prodiminant card was the Two of Cups - usually seen as a card of 'coming together.' However, in the Witches tarot (Reed) the image is a man at the bottom of a waterfall/cliff looking up at the woman he is pursuing. She is at the top of the cliff with both cups - and about to run from the man. The rest of the cards (unrecorded for the future - alas!) implied short-lived emotional ties. She was having an affair with a co-worker.}

Is everyone sure that it's her husband that is having or considering an affair?

It seems to me that if you picked up that the woman hadn't had sex with her husband in years, maybe the Q Wands rx reflects her own feelings of being thwarted. Maybe she is going to go outside the marriage (3 cups), and that will force her to an emotional confrontation (10 cups rx.)

Not knowing the other cards, it's tough to tell. But a marriage can be a good marriage, as she insisted, especially in later life, but have no sexual energy in it. It's easy to assume that an older man is having an affair with a younger woman. But it is just as often the case that an older man is simply not interested in sex any more, and that his wife still is. This is not uncommon.

So I'd look carefully at the surrounding cards before making a call on this one.

I was going to ask as well, why did this combination make you feel it was her husband having an affair? Women have affairs as well.

The three of cups can also represent a support group or marriage guidance counselling. In marriage guidance there are usually three people. It can also represent (for me anyway,) the internet and group forums - where it's very easy to hook up with people.

It would be interesting if you posted the whole spread, the question and the cards in their positions

Hi All,

and thanx for the replies

I am not sure why I thought it was the male who was having an affair. It just never crossed my mind. To me she just didn't seem the type (in retrospect that sounds like blind logic though *lol*). Now before anyone asks what is the type that i would think have affairs, I just don't know.
She just seemed so happy with her marriage & its longevity I didn't consider it.

FF