Kagura

I wonder if there is a gem or a crystal to "heal" the spirit (soul)?

Or should I say... To drive away all the evil inside... something that has a power to make a better feeling...

I'm lost since my mother died and I feel like I'm dying inside.
I don't know what is right or wrong, I don't even know who I am anymore.
But I have heard that some gems makes people feel better... and I just tought to ask If there is something?

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//Kagura

raeanne

Hi Kagura,
A quick look through my notes found these four:

Agate – Discerns the truth, accepts circumstances, powerful emotional healer.
Carnelian – Releases sorrow, envy, fear, apathy, and rage, past life work.
Diopside – Brings necessary tears, heals trauma, aids regression, scrying stone.
Elestials – Assist in comprehending life, levels of death, spirit and the immortality.

You may also want to carry an obsidian stone for protection (or any other protection stone you are familiar with) during your time of grief. You have my sympathy during these difficult days.

__________________
Raeanne - "If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is becuase he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away" Thoreau

Phoenix

I don't mean to offend, but I think that grief counselling would be the best for you at this point. It will help you deal with yout feelings.

However, for a stone, rose quartz comes to mind. It would probably be the best for you as it is potent in healing the emotions.

Good luck, and you have my sympathies.

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Guess who *my* favorite X-Men character is....

skytwig

Yes, I too suggest counseling. Therapy and the healing arts go well together. Counseling with someone you trust (you do have a choice) helps one to know where to use the stones effectively.

I am a Reiki Healer, but i am also a person who utilizes psychological therapy. It has proven to be a great combination.

I lost my mother a few years ago and depression hit me hard. It got so bad that i couldn't control it, even with Reiki, crystals work and meditation. I finally went to my doctor and got my anti-depressant changed and i got back into therapy.

Please don't try to 'fix' it on your own, OK? Depression is nothing to mess around with. Just ask your 'Guides/Spirit' for direction to someone who can help you, someone you will feel safe with.

All of the above listed stones are good to use. Chinese fluorite and smokey quartz are also helpful.

Blessings! - skytwig

Kagura

I know I nead therapy, but it has taken me 5 years to realise that... I'm still waiting for the call from this person who I'm supposed to meet...

I got some trouble to my self cause all of this. My mind is not so clear about enything anymore... I couldn't see how badly everything had gotten and how it effected them who are me near..

I just needed something to belive in... something that helps me together again... Just some little hope....

__________________
//Kagura

skytwig

Well, at least you are willing to get help. Do you have local resources to turn to if this person doesn't call back? and if it gets to the point of self-harm, please go to the hospital, OK?

You mind not being clear could be from depression, so be careful with yourself. seek immediate help if you feel overwhelmed. Call a crisis center or go to the hospital. sometimes, we just have to see we can't handle it on our own.

I shall send some Light your way.... Don't stop seeking outside help, though.

skytwig

Kagura

I got an time when i'm supposed to go there, but I have too much in school by then... so it will take more time for me...

I'm not that deppressed anymore... I'm just tired of trying to be something that i'm not... an angel as everyone of my relatives sees me... can't understand why...
It's hard to do what people says that I have to do when I don't wanna do it....

but im ok.... I will survive.... And thanks for the light....

__________________
//Kagura

buzzbee

I've found lithium crystals to be helpful - I have a double terminated one on a chain that I can wear helps sooth the wounds of the spirit.

Kagura - I applaud your investment in yourself to follow through with the grief counseling. Each of us has to decide in our way how long we will grieve.

My mom died when I was 22, and even though I wasn't living at home any more, it rocked my world. The fact that you now can see how your grief-behaviors were influencing those around you is a b-i-g step in the right direction.

It's also important that you learn the grief can end, but the love continues forever. I wish you peace in your heart.

Nevada

Kagura,

They must love you a lot and think you're very special. They just may not be very skilled at helping you with your grief. When you're experiencing grief, you can't be everything you or others expect of you. You need to be in the grief for a while and just let it hurt, and let it work itself out. Sometimes it feels as if your heart is literally breaking apart inside you. But that pain will pass. Saying goodbye to one you love can take a long time. If it's been a very long time -- over a year -- and you don't think you've made any progress then you should definitely get counseling. If the appointment you were given is a bad time for you then please call them back and ask for another time.

I lost my mother a little over a year ago. In my case, I knew ahead of time that she was dying, and I think I actually started through the grieving process while we were still taking care of her. But it is hard, and there isn't much that can help the pain except time, and working through it. It helped me a great deal to go through photographs of my mother from many different times of her life, including those when I didn't know her. It helped me know her spirit better and wish her many blessings on her way into her next life, whatever that may be.

I was 45 when I lost my mom. If you're much younger, then it's probably going to be more difficult to accept that she's not here for you in the physical world. We grow independent of our mothers very gradually as we get older, though the ties always exist. The grief is always hard, but I think harder for younger people.

Sometimes something happens, either good or bad, and I want to pick up the phone and call my mom to talk to her about it. Then I realize she's not there to call on the phone. Sometimes when this happens, I just talk to her anyway, wherever she is, and tell her what I would have said on the phone. I've found this very helpful when I'm missing her. I also found out what the nickname was that her friends called her when she was a girl. I bought myself a little teddy bear and named it by her childhood nickname, Percy. Whenever I felt really sad I would hug and talk to that bear. This helped me a lot too. I don't need it so much now, but I still keep that bear close, and now it will always be special to me.

I don't know what you believe, but I believe that my mother will always be my mother. It's a tie that never breaks completely. Think about what she wanted for you, and her love for you that brought you into this world. She's always with you, a very positive force in your life, a part of who you are.

We have a hospice here near where I live -- a place where people with terminal illnesses receive palliative care. The hospice also provides help for the grieving family members. The hospice my mother was at when she passed provided us counseling if we need it for up to 18 months after her death, and they had a chaplain we could speak to at any time we needed to. If you have a facililty like this in your area, perhaps called by a different name, you might try contacting them. They may be a good resource of helpful information in handling your grief. Perhaps they could refer you to a good counselor. If the first counselor doesn't feel like a good fit for you (ours didn't and we requested another), then try someone else. Sometimes the personality combination just isn't right, and you should feel that your counselor is someone you can safely open your heart to.

I hope some of this helps you. Grief is a process that is a little different for each person, though it follows a general pattern. You are normal, you're just hurting! You will get better. Though you'll always miss your mom to some degree, the pain will dissipate, and you'll live with loving and comforting memories of her all your life.

Please take care of yourself.

Hugs