A question for all you lovely professional readers~

I understand when a professional reader will not answer questions about health because they are not health practitioners. However, I was wondering in what circumstance would you not answer a question about future love life possibilities?

I asked my psychic the other day and she was very vague... basically told me that "due to my morals as a psychic reader, I cannot answer this question as it would sway your decision." However, the point of getting a reading done is to anticipate possible outcomes so it doesn't throw you for a loop, is it not? Why would this one cause a moral dilemna?

likely she didnt know the answer, and sometimes they dont want to tell you about things like that because it might hold you back.

If i dont know the answer i say i say it, i say i am not being shown anything, but i also ask why she cant be told. the only way i see it as a moral decision if the person involved is married, or the prospective partner is

yeah, ditto to what 214red said..
If I ever have some moral/theological/whatever issue with what someone wants a reading about, I let them know specifically, and find another way to address the question.
It seems odd to me that someone would just tell you they can't answer your question, but not why.
Sometimes a person asks me the same question repeatedly, 20 different ways, not really listening to the answer that I'm supplying (likely because it's not the answer they're hoping for), and at a certain point, I refuse to read anymore on that topic... and usually they don't get why.. but I don't think that's your situation?

Surely - for example .- "should I get married?" would be a question a reader would think twice about reading on. That's a future love life question and I would have thought the person themselves shouldn't be going to the cards for such a significant decision (assuming we all take getting married quite seriously?)

Obviously, I have no idea what your question was, but if anyone asked me to read on things such as "do I truly love him/her?" I'd say - come on - dig deep and look inside, analyze yourself. The cards shouldn't be used for that type of thing, surely.

I mean the cards can be used for anything. I'm just thinking of circumstances/issues which would strike me as *odd*...

(I know we don't do yes/no questions anyway. Doesn't stop querents wanting to have a reading on a yes/no question though)

Le Fanu said:

Surely - for example .- "should I get married?" would be a question a reader would think twice about reading on. That's a future love life question and I would have thought the person themselves shouldn't be going to the cards for such a significant decision (assuming we all take getting married quite seriously?)

Obviously, I have no idea what your question was, but if anyone asked me to read on things such as "do I truly love him/her?" I'd say - come on - dig deep and look inside, analyze yourself. The cards shouldn't be used for that type of thing, surely.

I mean the cards can be used for anything. I'm just thinking of circumstances/issues which would strike me as *odd*...

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I'm with you, Leffy. Not least because it would effectively involve someone who isn't there to be consulted. But also - as you say - we need to live our lives, make our own decisions, not ask the cards for permission, almost, before trying anything.

I think there's always the possibility that the reader within any medium will filter the information they give you based on their own experience and values. To me, as much as possible, it's my obligation to give the reading in spite of my own values. If, for instance, the reader thinks cheating on a spouse is a bad thing, he or she might temper the reading based on that value. However, I think that's doing the client a disservice. The client ALWAYS has the choice to act on the information provided, regardless of source.

However, if the reader sees the client killing themselves or someone else because of romantic passion, isn't that good enough reason to modify the message somewhat? Would you say, "good grief, don't KILL yourself over this!" or would you say, "you might find yourself seriously losing perspective and contact with reality AND you have the ability to avoid that; please take steps to recognize that and take another path"?

It's quite possible that whatever the message and however grave or mundane your reader couldn't come up with the words to get the idea across without compromising their values. You do get to ask more questions of course, at least usually this is possible in a reading, so you could find out more. By now your reader is likely not to be in touch with the message that had come through, no offense to you.

Finally, it is remotely possible that your reader was hoping you'd book another reading. There are quite a few threads that discuss how to tell a good 'un from a bad 'un in AT. I don't want to say your reader was a bad one because, as I note above, there can be ordinary "good people" reasons why they could not give you the message at that moment.

Marcia959 said:

I think there's always the possibility that the reader within any medium will filter the information they give you based on their own experience and values. To me, as much as possible, it's my obligation to give the reading in spite of my own values. If, for instance, the reader thinks cheating on a spouse is a bad thing, he or she might temper the reading based on that value. However, I think that's doing the client a disservice. The client ALWAYS has the choice to act on the information provided, regardless of source.

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Well put!
It's my belief that the cards deliver the information that the person most needs to hear in that moment.
I have done a ton of readings for people about their infidelity; it's a pretty common question actually.
I do have moral problems with cheaters, but I think my job as a reader is to be as impartial as I can, and deliver the message on the table. Besides, I can probably be of more use actually doing a reading about their tangled situation (the reading will reveal the complexities of it!), than just saying that it's beneath me to address that, and leaving the person to deal with it on their own. Often, those kind of readings will help to detail why the person should think about the morality of their situation, in a way that's clearer than just me preaching at them.
I also think that I can't assume I know better what's right about their life than they do. They have the right to ask for the information they want, and then do what they like with it.

As for "Should I get married?", I think it's a fine question. Obviously, a choice of that magnitude shouldn't hinge entirely on a card-reading.. but it may help them to sort out their choice.
That's not a question I'd draw a 'yes' or 'no' card for.. but I think it would be valuable to cards exploring their perception of what marriage is about, perhaps cards about the dynamics of their current relationship (if they have one), and to understand better what might push them forward or what might hold them back, and what processes they might use to know when they're ready.

214red said:

likely she didnt know the answer, and sometimes they dont want to tell you about things like that because it might hold you back.

If i dont know the answer i say i say it, i say i am not being shown anything, but i also ask why she cant be told. the only way i see it as a moral decision if the person involved is married, or the prospective partner is

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Hmm... interesting. My question was, simply, would him and I possibly be anything more than friends? Neither of us are married at all... the only thing she would say is that she "didnt' want to sway my decision." Confusion, right?!

Rasa said:

yeah, ditto to what 214red said..
If I ever have some moral/theological/whatever issue with what someone wants a reading about, I let them know specifically, and find another way to address the question.
It seems odd to me that someone would just tell you they can't answer your question, but not why.
Sometimes a person asks me the same question repeatedly, 20 different ways, not really listening to the answer that I'm supplying (likely because it's not the answer they're hoping for), and at a certain point, I refuse to read anymore on that topic... and usually they don't get why.. but I don't think that's your situation?

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lol! Nope. Definitely not my question. I totally do understand that though. lol... if it was "no" the first time... it'll probably be "no" for about 14 million times after~

Le Fanu said:

Surely - for example .- "should I get married?" would be a question a reader would think twice about reading on. That's a future love life question and I would have thought the person themselves shouldn't be going to the cards for such a significant decision (assuming we all take getting married quite seriously?)

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I definitely wouldn't go to the cards for something like that. It's a decision that I would want to make based on what I wanted, not what the cards were telling me. ^^

Obviously, I have no idea what your question was, but if anyone asked me to read on things such as "do I truly love him/her?" I'd say - come on - dig deep and look inside, analyze yourself. The cards shouldn't be used for that type of thing, surely.

I mean the cards can be used for anything. I'm just thinking of circumstances/issues which would strike me as *odd*...

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lol... it makes no sense to me to ask the cards what I already know. I was only asking if she sees possibility of something more than friendship between him and I. I left it really general, but she couldn't answer my question. =(

(I know we don't do yes/no questions anyway. Doesn't stop querents wanting to have a reading on a yes/no question though)

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lol! Yes/no questions... gotta love to hate them =P