My chart: Team effort

I have gone back to looking and thinking about my chart, and wanted to share my observations here in the hopes of receiving feedback, criticism, and opinions on whether or not I'm getting the right sense of how all the different relationships in a chart function. I also think my chart is interesting (does anyone ever actually feel their personal chart isn't interesting? ), and wanted to share it in case it is interesting to others.

noby's chart

One of the things that powerfully jumps out at me is the sets of conjunctions on my chart, and how in general they are conjunctions between planets normally associated with one another or seen as a pair of opposites.

Sun conjunct Moon: In my experience, this relationship is manifested in the lack of distinction between my inner and outer life. I publicly share my innermost thoughts, and honesty and self-disclosure are very important values to me. I can often see and admit when my outwardly manifested behavior is the product of some inner event or state. I think this planetary relationship has helped give me a boost in the work of becoming self-aware.

That both of these planets are in Aquarius suggests how much of my being is reflected by this sign. The interaction between this conjunction and the sign Aquarius sometimes tends to make me perversely contrary, as I delight in openly airing observations that make others uncomfortable. I can also see here some struggle in accessing my intuition, as my core being and instinct are in an intellectual sign.

Venus conjunct Mars: This seems to be a more problematic relationship. Venus in dreamy Pisces meets with my Aquarian traits to make me very idealistic in the realm of romance and pleasure. But the squares to Venus make sense in my lack of luck or abundance in sexual love. Mars in Pisces seems to indicate an unfocused expression of force, fruitless outbursts, and the inability to really gather and focus energy to initiate change. There's a hesitancy in Mars in Pisces, an uncertainty as to where to direct energy.

And the fact that both of these planets are conjoined, two planets which point in very different directions in a lot of ways, seems to often leave me feeling torn between two different options. I find myself losing my temper in a nasty way and then lovingly apologizing afterwards. I go too far off the handle, but then go too far in apologizing and making myself into a doormat. I tend to swing from one extreme to another.

Pluto conjunct Saturn: I think this pair of planets make a great team. I personally experienced the power of their interaction when I experienced the personal transit Pluto square Saturn at a time I was at a Zen monastery. I could see in that experience the manifestation of this relationship, which is that all of that structure and seeming limitation created pressure which led to profound transformation. I see this team as working in a very purifying and intensifying way, pressurizing inner coal into diamond. I believe this pairing has been and will continue to be of great benefit as I walk the spiritual path.

The fact that this pairing occurs in the Twelfth House further suggests to me the spiritual and otherworldly nature of this relationship, and its nature as helping me open up into the Absolute. Both planets are conjunct my Ascendant, which is Scorpio, and which is ruled by Pluto. Lots of transformational power. Also, they are the only two major planets in my chart which appear above the horizon. All of this makes me think that spirituality and personal transformation will be a big part of whatever work I do in the world, and it all also goes to explain the degree to which spiritual study and practice dominates and steers my daily life.

Jupiter conjunct Uranus: Uranus is an important planet given my Sun and Moon are both in Aquarius. I also have three planets in Sagittarius, including these two, suggesting the strength of Jupiter's influence. This relationship is a bit more odd and hard to understand for me. It seems that the revolutionary energy of Uranus pushes me to go against the grain in my quest for expanding my knowledge. Perhaps this explains why I enjoy studying less respected and more arcane disciplines, and rebel against the more conventional forms which life tries to saddle me with.

Some other observations: Thank God I have Mercury in Capricorn; otherwise, with all of that nutty Aquarian energy, I don't think I'd make sense to anyone else, and probably not even myself! I appreciate how this placement seems to help me express more abstract and "woo woo" ideas in a down to earth and understandable manner. Interesting how many Mercury squares I have, as communication has never been a difficulty in my life. If I want to communicate something, I am fortunate enough to be blessed with the ability to find the right words and ideas to express what I am thinking, feeling, or sensing.

I often struggle with a lack of groundedness. I tend towards abstraction and idealism, to such a degree I've come up with an expression to describe this phenomenon: "floating away in my red hot-air balloon of abstraction." I notice this lack of grounding reflected in the fact I only have one major planet in an Earth sign, and it, as noted in the above paragraph, has a lot of squares.

Oh, how I do go on about myself! I hope I haven't bored you all to death

Any observations, comments, or criticisms much welcomed and appreciated.

A few comments

Noby, your Sun/Moon conjunction can be looked at in different ways. When we consider the special realtionship we see in this pair, one of the more obvious factors is the fast-changing relationship between them. How many of us have wondered how we would be different were the Moon somewhere else in our chart. A few hours, a few days and we would have been a different person. In your case, the Moon emerging from a conjunction with the Sun symbolizes the "performer" phase -- these people tend to be actors, to seek recognition from those around them, to be the center of attention. Don't these few words strike home!

When we consider the planetary pattern of your chart, the Saturn/Pluto/ASC conjunction is a real key. These are the first planets rising and tend to shape your personality: tenacity, one who commits all resources to achieve her ends, self-disciplin is the word of the day according to these factors when taken together and excluding other chart characteristics. Now, consider the Sun/Moon characteristics I noted earlier. The two patterns, Sun/Moon and Saturn/Pluto can augment each other quite comfortably.

Now, consider the square to Mercury. Mercury works with our perspective functions; Mercury categorizes, files, perceives through its own built-up filters and directs/shapes our view of the universe and immediate environment. How is Mercury going to cope with this powerful personality focus?

Perhaps we need to look at Venus/Mars. Normally this pair helps us work towards achieving a kind of "poise" between these polar opposites, achieving a sense of balance in handeling anger, a form of aggresiveness in seeking harmony and balance -- a nice ying/yang engine, actually, that affects our personality expression, sexual awareness and self-confidence. So, how are we to tie this energy into the Saturn/Pluto energy? If we look at Ebertin's mid-point system and methodology, these two groups are in a 135 degree relationship (a square and a half), very powerful in that system.

Lets put together a mid-point structural sentance and see what we get! "The urge to engage in research, exercise thoroughness, the need to solve difficult issues is often carried out in solitude. Even the cutting off of relationships and other social involvements will be done in order to facilitate your task(s) or interests. You will resist most efforts to dissuade you from following thru in the direction(s) you choose." Now, this is a little stinted since it is based on fragmented interpretations -- a little like "keywords".

This above statement now explains a bit about how Mercury works! You are quite mental (or, as you say, aloof in your dealings with people) and do not take the time or make the effort to indulge others when that approach would interfere with your tasks, your veiws, your plans. Now, I'm sure that you are a more gentle creature then these words suggest, but I'm trying to piece together some fragmentary information about you and your chart. We can "nice" it all up later as fellow astrologers often do. We can't treat clients this way but we can "astro-babble" each other.

Now, on to Jupiter/Uranus. I suspect these two may trine your MC. This would provide a sense of personal magnetism, an inspirational drive imparted to others ---- Ohhh, so this is the mechanism that supports your Sun/Moon drive to be the center of attention, to lead, to be recognized. You want to be a leader on your terms! Your Venus/Mars will have to catch up before you can do this more comfortably, do your thing with grace and style, achieve closeness with others. Your Mercury has a few things to learn.

Well, thats my copious and blunt take on things. Dave

Fascinating observations, dadsnook2000. Thanks so much for your thoughts!

A lot of that hits home, especially "The urge to engage in research, exercise thoroughness, the need to solve difficult issues is often carried out in solitude. Even the cutting off of relationships and other social involvements will be done in order to facilitate your task(s) or interests. You will resist most efforts to dissuade you from following thru in the direction(s) you choose."

One of the suggestions you make raises a lot of question marks. I don't seek the spotlight in any obvious way; I tend towards solitude, and when in larger social situations, hug the corners. I really don't like having a lot of attention directed my way. I have a lot of issues from having grown up with perfectionist parents and being something of a perfectionist myself; I have issues around not feeling "worthy" of attention, and fearing rejection from others. This tends to make me shun the spotlight. I'm a horrible actress, too.

That said, there is a part of me that deeply wants to be recognized, on a larger scale. I want to do some kind of work in the world that will resonate with many people and initiate some major movement, particularly in the area of the way people work with their own consciousness. That said, I don't desire the trappings of fame, the wealth or mass adulation. But I do want to create something powerful. I tend to look at this desire to create something that reaches thousands or millions versus hundreds or dozens as an egotism, and something to be dropped and overcome. But it's there. But other than that, I'm not sure where the "actor" or "spotlight seeking" thing fits in. Maybe it's a shadow thing? I've always avoided lots of attention, but perhaps some part of me wants to be validated? I don't know.

Oh, and no worries about needing to "nice" it up. If you think my chart suggests I'm evil incarnate, I'd still like to hear it. None of the "harsher" things you suggest ring false. I enjoy looking at my shadow and my "bad qualities" and working with them.

Again, thanks for your post, it's very thought-provoking and helpful.

An added comment.

You are not through yet in the process of growing into and becomming your chart. Remember what I said about Venus/Mars! When you reach the point where you assimilate them into yourself you will gain a broader sense of "poise" and naturalness. This will modify Mercury's workings and allow you both see and think about things differently.

With the poise and gracefulness that will strengthen over time, you will let the Sun/Moon actress-recognition-attention mechanism express itself. Yes, you may never be a Michael Jackson (Sun-Moon opposition) type of show-off but you will be more the center of attention and much admired. Dave

Well since Dave's offered his observations, I hope you don't mind some critiquing. You've gotten off to a very good start though!

- sun conj moon> true, you've got a double helping of detached Aquarius, but you may have more receptive energy than you think: you also have your chart ruler (planet ruling ASC sign) in Pisces, three planets + ASC in water, plus your 4th and 12th house are tenanted.

- do take note that the squares to your Mars/Venus conjunction are pretty wide. Your Saturn/Pluto aspects are probably more influential overall esp b/c they are conj your ASC. But back to the conjunction - Mars/Venus seems a contradiction, but it can manifest in a great deal of charm, magnetism. The way you describe the two, it's almost like you have an opposition there! Hm... This may be b/c it's easier for a man to express this energy b/c (and I'm assuming you're still living in TN) sexual charisma for N. American women is sometimes labelled as "slutty" etc whereas men would be considered in more neutral terms like "hot". (The worst term applying to a male I can think of is "player" which is also something of a compliment.)

As for the lack of lovin, well, your planets do square both traditional and modern house rulers (Jupiter, Neptune respectively). Jupiter's conjunction to Uranus might make this area particularly unstable or unpredictable.

- you've got a very positive view of Pluto conjunct Saturn in 12th. I wish other ppl trying to deal w/those planets or w/the 12th house could all read it.

Thanks for all the feedback, everyone. I have found it very helpful, thought-provoking, and encouraging.

Sometimes I forget that I am still so young... Good reminder, ds2000, that I haven't yet grown into my chart. I will be interested in seeing how all of these different aspects do and do not manifest over the years.

Leo62, good reminder about the Leo midheaven. I've wondered about that, as the Leonine energy seems so distinct from the other kinds of energies going on in my chart and those which are expressed in my life and personality. Although Sun Opposition Midheaven may work to some extent to explain that.

And I do experience myself, and others have described me as, an "intense" person... even though I rarely feel I'm at an intense enough level!

Of course I don't mind critiquing, isthmus. I asked for it, didn't I?

I'm still a noob at this, so there's certainly going to be places I flounder around in trying to interpret my chart.

You and Leo62 are right to remind me of the interaction between detached Aquarius and the other more emotional and receptive areas of my chart.

Point well taken about my struggling to understand Mars and Venus, and looking at it more like an opposition than a "team effort."

I'm bemused and amused at all this talk of my magnetism and sexual charisma... Other people tend to give me a wide berth. Although it can't be said I really make the effort to be approachable or to approach others.

noby said:

I'm bemused and amused at all this talk of my magnetism and sexual charisma... Other people tend to give me a wide berth. Although it can't be said I really make the effort to be approachable or to approach others.

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Noby - I think this may be because they are picking up on those powerful Pluto/Scorpio energies. Your energy is strong and magnetic and probably you scare people without realising it! I have Moon/Pluto conjunct, and I was always bewildered and a bit hurt when people gave me, as you say, a "wide berth" (and when I thought I was being so nice and "harmless" too ). It took an astrologer to point out to me that a strong Pluto (and certainly Scorpio rising) gives out powerful energy of its own whether you intend it or not. Don't want to sound patronising or paternalistic, but this *does* get easier as you get older and begin to own the weightier side of your chart and your personality (which of course your Aquarian side would rather explain and rationalise out of existence!). Some kind of physical energy-work might be useful, to get you out of your head; I don't know what you're into, but I've found martial arts (when I was younger!) and more recently Tai Chi particularly helpful.
Good luck.

Sorry it took me so long to reply to you, Leo62.

You make good points. Certainly, there are a lot of energies going on in my chart which add up to reinforce my personal experiences of being intimidating to others and avoided by them. It's funny, actually, there's a few people I see on a regular basis whom I only know casually, such as students who are in classes I take, who look like deer in headlights when they see me nearby. I always thought, "Oh, they're afraid that the weirdo might greet them in public." But perhaps there's something more to it than that...

I actually wanted to start learning aikido this semester, but it didn't work out. I do make sure to do things which get me out of my head, such as aerobics classes, gamelan ensemble (a Balinese musical ensemble composed of brass metallophones and gongs), and of course, regular, daily zazen (Zen meditation). I know I should probably spend more of my leisure time doing something other than reading and writing, though...

dadsnook2000 said:

Now, consider the square to Mercury. Mercury works with our perspective functions; Mercury categorizes, files, perceives through its own built-up filters and directs/shapes our view of the universe and immediate environment. How is Mercury going to cope with this powerful personality focus?

...Your Mercury has a few things to learn.

Click to expand...

It's interesting to come back and re-read this. I'm currently dealing with a lot of the patterns of belief and perception I've accumulated which hold me back, muddy the waters, or leave me in a stalemate.

I feel things intensely, and am driven (Pluto conj. Saturn conj. ASC), but often get stuck (square) trying to explain or rationalize (Mercury) my experiences or feelings. I often second-guess myself. Mercury in conservative Capricorn seems to work positively to give structure and solidity to some of my more abstract thoughts, helping me to communicate subtle matters more concretely. But I can see how also, given its squares to powerful elements in my chart, it can interfere with my dedication to break through and break out of stagnation or prescribed life paths, as I revert back to conservative second-guessing, trying to "be more realistic." I often have a hard time telling the difference between something crazy and something valid. I waffle about everything, taking a lot of extra time to make any particular decision. I could go on and on, but basically, I can see how "Mercury has a lot to learn." This is very helpful.