Originally Posted by caridwen
Why would it be the negative aspect of the Queen here, as in, that I was somehow disatsified. I always imagined the Queen to be very sensual and sexy.
That's exactly it. She's sensual and sexy. And I didn't mean to imply that YOU were dissatisfied. I meant that your ex's might have *felt* that they couldn't satisfy you.
Look, I've found that people often fall into four camps when it comes to seeking a:
1) There are those who want a partner who takes control; who makes the decisions, does the work, is smarter, etc. than they are, and they can sit back and enjoy the ride while the partner drives. They want to be a "cheerleader" and the want a "hero" to cheer on, support and love.
2) There are those who want a "sometime" partner. An equal but different person who lives their own life, while they live theirs, and now and then, the two get together. Weird as this might sound, some people like this idea of the wife having her life, the husband having his, and now and then they meet for dinner. Some of these people even live in separate houses or don't see each other for a month at a time.
3) There are guys who want an equal partner. Someone who's on par with them intellectually, and in ambition and holds much of the same interests. They want to team up with this person, like a superhero team. Work together, shoulder to shoulder. Some are so equal and so close they seem to be joined at the hip. Others are more yin/yang; one's weakness is the others strength and vice versa.
4) There are those who want, essentially, the opposite of #1. They want a partner who isn't as smart as they are, or as strong or able to earn as much money, or whatever. And they get to feel ike the breadwinner and they get to explain things, and they get to drive and the other person praises them for their driving. They get to be the hero, and their partner is their biggest fan and cheerleader.
When you meet guys who fit into category #4, they're going to have a problem with a woman who is sexual and sensual. THEY want to be the one who is sexual and sensual--and they want the girl to be shy and awkward, so they can show her the way. They don't need to be her first, but they want to be the one to make her blossom into a woman.
So, yeah. The Queen/Pents IS sexual and sensual. THAT is what's going to make some guys unhappy with her. Because they want someone they can teach and mold, not someone who might call the shots, and who might know enough to judge their performance.
If you picked guys who wanted you to admire THEIR sexuality and learn from it, then YOUR sexuality would have threatened them.