Complicated Relationship Situations

[prissybaby]

Hi guys! I have another question.

When you do a reading, particularly relationship ones, do you find you give a better reading for complicated situations if you have some background to what happened to get the two lovers to where they are now? Or can you do the reading "cold" such that you always seem to find the complications that led to where they are in your reading and can give an accurate future reading or advice without the questioner giving background information?

 

[SunChariot]

Well, I do most of my readings for others "cold" as I only read for others online. I don't ask for background info, but sometimes people just give it.

So which results in a better reading....? I think that might depend on how you read. Reading in person might be different from reading online as you can pick up cues from the querent, which can help some people but doesn't work for me.

In the end, I guess I can only tell you what works for me and let others answer for themselves. Ideally, I think it ought not to matter. I personally believe my answers come from Spirit, which knows all and is always willing to pass on that info. But enough background info to really understand the question can be useful so we don't make inaccurate assumptions.

Eg If someone were to ask me "How can I solve the issues in my relationship with "S"? I might just presume it is a romantic relationship, when it might be a relationship with her daugther. If I just presume it is a romantic relationship, that could affect how I interpret the cards...

Babs

 

[Grizabella]

There are some who pride themselves on doing better readings if they know nothing in advance, but I prefer the background information. I'll do them either way, though. I seem to do equally as well whether I have background info or not, but I still prefer at least some background because I think it saves time. Of course, time is money some would say, but the money isn't my focus. I'm more interested in helping my sitter. I work by donation if I'm going to charge at all.

Now, before anyone nitpicks and construes that what I'm saying is that those who don't want background information are just trying to drag the time out to make more money---don't even go there. That's not what I'm saying at all. There's nobody here who would do that so far as I know and I trust that everyone just does what's the most expedient for them, same as I do.

 

[prissybaby]

Grizabella, since you enjoy background information, do you think there is such a thing as too much information when it comes to a reading?

 

[Manda]

I want a focus, for example I want to know if we are dealing with a romantic relationship or another kind, but I do not want background information. That clouds it for me.

 

[Alta]

I don't want a lot of background information, but I like to know roughly where it falls between hopeful crush and life-long love affair.

 

[vonniedeak]

I usually ask for a little background information and let them tell me a little about it. I read professionally (for money) and I don't try to waste my clients time in giving a reading so far off or so vague that it wastes their time and they come away disappointed. There will always be those people who leave you guessing and relying on gut instinct and your cards accuracy, though, so my advice would be to listen to your cards most of all. The cards won't lead you wrong. The more specific their question...the more specific the cards will be and I tell them that straight up.

Blessed be,

Von

 

[caridwen]

This is difficult as I have done readings for people that would have made a lot more sense if they had told me some background on the reading.

Background also helps form a question and I make up spreads depending on the situation. For example, a querent asks for advice on their love life so I do a Celtic Cross as it's a good overall spread for a general reading. Then halfway through the reading they reveal that they actually want to choose between two lovers. Great! Thanks for letting me know... I could have done a more succinct reading on options and outcomes.

However, sometimes we judge other's situations when they give us background information for example, using the above querent. She is married and wants to know who to choose, her husband with whom she has three young children and has been with for twenty years or her 20 year old lover she met three months ago giving free Salsa classes in a tapas bar. It isn't for me to judge and say do I really have to do a reading on this? You should go back to your husband and make the marriage work. That isn't my decision to make and that isn't my judgement call.

I may then proceed to do a very prejudicial reading because I think she should go back to her husband and not run off with her dance teacher.

If she doesn't give me the background information, I may actually advise her to choose option A which turns out to be the tapas teacher...who knows?

I think a general indication of what they want to know is enough to start off with. Then the reading should hopefully reveal the rest.

 

[BelovedK]

I do give a more helpful reading with a little background information. I am not as gifted of a psychic as I wish I was, and have been way off before with a cold reading. I don't want much, but the basics and a succinct question.